pictured above: Sam Darnold, ballin' out
CONGRATULATIONS TO ...
* The New York Football Jets, who ran their playoff-free streak to 14 seasons, which is the longest run of any team in the Big 4 sports (NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL). In the NFL, they're trailed by the Broncos (8 seasons), Panthers (6) and Falcons (6). No other team has more than three.
* The Carolina Panthers, who extended the NFL's longest active streak of seasons with 10+ losses to six. (It's the third longest streak of the Super Bowl era; only the Bucs from 1983-94 and the Raiders from 2003-09 have sucked worse.)
* The 2024 Cowboys, who became the first team since the 2021 Cowboys to turn a blocked punt into a first down for the kicking team.
* The Chicago Bears, who had 4 yards of total offense in the first half of Sunday's game vs the Niners.
* Homer Simpson, who on Monday night became the first player since the AFL-NFL merger to throw a TD pass and intercept a pass in the same game.
PLAYOFF PICTURE
If the playoffs started today (via ESPN's Playoffs Machine):
Only one major change this week: In the NFC, the Bucs take the #4 seed from the Falcons.
AFC
Bye: Chiefs** (12-1)
#7 Broncos (8-5) at #2 Bills** (10-3)
#6 Chargers (8-5) at #3 Steelers (10-3)
#5 Ravens (8-5) at #4 Texans (8-5)
On the bubble: Colts and Dolphins (6-7)
Eliminated last week: Browns, Jets and Titans (joining the Patriots, Jaguars and Raiders)
NFC
Bye: Lions* (12-1)
#7 Commanders (8-5) at #2 Eagles* (11-2)
#6 Packers (9-4) at #3 Seahawks (8-5)
#5 Vikings (11-2) at #4 Buccaneers (7-6)
On the bubble: Rams (7-6), Falcons (6-7), Cardinals (6-7), Niners (6-7)
Eliminated last week: No one (the Giants are the only team out)
(* = clinched playoff spot)
(** = clinched division)
Draft order: Raiders, Giants, Patriots, Panthers, Jags (via Tankathon)
... Jags had the first pick but had to go ahead and win. Dummies!
WEEK 15 SCHEDULE
(# = divisional game)
A week with a bunch of matchups no one wants to see (Jets-Jags, any game involving the Giants or Titans) is saved by intriguing TNF and SNF games, a MNF doubleheader and a great late Sunday afternoon slate. Even better, it looks like we might be getting TWO games in each of the early Sunday and late Sunday slots.
Thursday
Rams at Niners (Prime)# **
Sunday early
Cowboys at Panthers (Fox)
Chiefs at Browns (CBS)
Dolphins at Texas (CBS)
Jets at Jaguars (Fox), ugh
Commanders at Saints (Fox)
Ravens at Giants (CBS)
Bengals at Titans (Fox)
Sunday late
(all games start at 425p)
Patriots at Cardinals (CBS)
Colts at Broncos (CBS)
Bills at Lions (CBS GOTW)***********************
Buccaneers at Chargers (Fox)
Steelers at Eagles (Fox GOTW) *****
Sunday night
Packers at Seahawks (NBC) ***
Monday night
Bears at Vikings, 8p (ABC)
Falcons at Raiders, 830p (ESPN)
Byes: None! We're done with that nonsense
Coverage maps: Here on Wednesday afternoon
Feels like a must win TNF game.
Bucs at Chargers. West coast games never go well, Herbert's going to torch Tampa's garbage secondary.
Please let Desmond Ridder beat the Falcons. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease.
* Homer Simpson, who on Monday night became the first player since the AFL-NFL merger to throw a TD pass and intercept a pass in the same game.
^^^
Misspelled Browns. The Browns are as least as bad an organization, and you have to live in Cleveland.
Feels like a must win TNF game.
Every game from here on out is must-win for SF if they want a shot.
Stele wrote:Feels like a must win TNF game.
Every game from here on out is must-win for SF if they want a shot.
Plus need Washington to utterly collapse, being two games back for that last spot. Problem is Washington has one tough game against the Eagles, then it's Saints, Falcons, Cowboys, all of whom could be in full-bore garbage fire mode by the time they play. And, yes, the Saints' big move this week was signing Ben DiNuzzi to give competition to Rattler and Pretty Boy Haener, so I'm guessing that counts as garbage fire mode.
I expect the Bucs to get stomped this weekend (Winfield's knee is bothering him again, and he's out for a few weeks), but they did just sign LB Deion Jones. Why is this actual news? Well, he's the exclamation point on the Jameis era:
one tough game against the Eagles, then it's Saints
Say less, fam. It's as good as done.
The Bucs best shot is that that Cousins might be washed at this point. Which makes sense. He's coming off an Achilles tear.
Question is do the Falcons audible to Penix or ride it out with Cousins. In the past I'm pretty sure they said they would play Cousins regardless but I wonder if it gets to the point where he's a statue and might actually die.
Ideally if they were gaming it out for future years they probably know they are not going anywhere in the playoffs so sit Penix. Cousins gets them in yay if not yay higher draft. But this is the same team that threw a bag at Cousins then over drafted Penix so even if they luck into their best future situation they might Jets/Browns it.
(I took the Bucs for the division when it was floating at 4.5-5:1. I'm not special I also took the 49ers to win the West 3 weeks ago)
Oh, the Falcons are terrible, and if Tampa had an even vaguely capable defense the division would have been won by now, but we're going to be starting guys like Kaevon Merriweather and Vi Jones, and, if you don't know those names, there's a reason.
That being said, I think we can all agree the game with the highest potential entertainment value this week is Raiders-Falcons, just from the perspective that if the Falcons lose, the implosion will be incredibly fun to watch over the next few weeks.
Oh, the Falcons are terrible
But the dumpster fire's so delightful.
This is vastly an improvement over their Tyson-Paul broadcast but... Manti Te'o?
You know, I'm perfectly with not having NFL football on the teevee EVERY GODDAMN WAKING MINUTE OF EVERY GODDAMN DAY. Let these poor f**kers spend some time with their families.
Yes, I know. Chiefs-Steelers and Ravens-Texas. Two quality games, blah blah. But all four teams are playing on four days rest (because the NFL is giving us Texans-Chiefs and Steelers-Ravens on the preceding Saturday). Plus I've got sh!t to do Christmas Day.
Why are there 24 people involved in broadcasting a football game? Are they going to play a pickup game in the park on camera? Scott Hanson and Mina Kimes are the kickers?
but... Manti Te'o?
Don't they have a catfishing show? It's cross-promotion.
Confirmed for the 430p Sunday slot: Everyone gets two late games, with most of the county getting Bills-Lions and the Keystone State Bowl (aka Eagles-Steelers).
This map for the 430p Fox game is hilarious:
The red is Steelers-Eagles (ie most of us). Blue is Bucs-Chargers, which isn't a bad game necessarily but its existence is depriving people in these markets from watching Steelers-Eagles:
* most of Florida (bc Bucs)
* LA (bc current Chargers)
* San Diego (bc NFL just has to troll the former home of the Chargers)
* Oregon (bc Justin Herbert)
* ATL (out here catching programming strays for no obvious reason)
Bill Belichick is apparently finalizing a deal to become the head coach in Carolina.
Sorry, Enix, I meant the University of North Carolina. I guess he's pulling a Reverse Saban here? It just seems incredibly bizarre in all ways, college is such a different world than the pros.
Is his son unhireable? Is this basically Bill kicking open a door for Steven?
The Steelers vs the Eagles is very much always a big brother vs kid brother game.
I’m starting to come around to the idea that Minnesota should seriously explore keeping Sam Darnold as their QB for 2025 and beyond.
If they were to do so, this draft class’s weak QB roster gives them a unique opportunity. I think if they were to make JJ McCarthy available for trade, they’d have multiple teams in the top 10 interested.
I think JJ would easily go somewhere in picks 3-8 if he were in this draft class (he went at 10 this past year).
If you’re one of the 5 QB needy teams in the top 10, and you miss out on the top two guys, would you trade your pick plus a 2nd to “draft” JJ McCarthy (minus one contracted year)?
If you’re the Vikings and you could flip JJ for a top 10 pick plus an early 2nd, would you?
If Darnold finishes the year strong, I think this scenario is gonna start picking up traction.
Minnesota could always keep JJM and do the Jordan Love plan, but the weakness of the QB draft class and the demand for QBs at the top of it really opens an interesting window.
And how much would you be willing to pay for his FA contract?
I’m starting to come around to the idea that Minnesota should seriously explore keeping Sam Darnold as their QB for 2025 and beyond.
Funniest thing would be to trade HEYDARNOLD back to Carolina so Handsome Dave can (a) bench a guy he doesn't really believe in, and (b) take credit for all the QBs who have turned their careers around while they were coworkers.
And how much would you be willing to pay for his FA contract?
I think a good starting point for a Darnold deal would be the 3 year, $100m deal that Baker signed this past offseason. Then we have to factor in another year of cap inflation, plus the fact that the QB draft market is considerably weaker in 2025 than 2024. I think his value should be in the upper 30s, with market competition pushing it into the low 40s.
Now, if Matt Stafford retires this offseason and the Rams get involved, then the market competition gets even hotter, and I think then he's looking into something in the mid-40s like Kirk Cousins signed this year. I think the one spot that might be even more appealing to Darnold than staying in Minnesota is hooking up with McVay, where he can stay in the same kind of offense but return home to LA.
I don't think we're looking at him joining the $50m+ tier unless the Vikings go on a deep playoff run. If they win the Super Bowl, then all bets are off.
How to make Legion's night:
1. Dre Greenlaw returns to practice.
2. JAKE HAENER NAMED STARTER IN NEW ORLEANS.
Be a real shame when Greenlaw's abdomen explodes five plays in thanks to the apparent 49ers curse.
How to make Legion's night:
1. Dre Greenlaw returns to practice.
2. JAKE HAENER NAMED STARTER IN NEW ORLEANS.
3. 53 YARD FIELD GOAL BY JAKE MONEY MOODY
If the Niners could stop dropping INTs Stafford is trying to throw to them, that’d be awesome.
MilkmanDanimal wrote:How to make Legion's night:
1. Dre Greenlaw returns to practice.
2. JAKE HAENER NAMED STARTER IN NEW ORLEANS.3. 53 YARD FIELD GOAL BY JAKE MONEY MOODY
49ERS CONTINUE TO STALL OUTSIDE RED ZONE
Neither team remembered to bring their offense
*Legion* wrote:MilkmanDanimal wrote:How to make Legion's night:
1. Dre Greenlaw returns to practice.
2. JAKE HAENER NAMED STARTER IN NEW ORLEANS.3. 53 YARD FIELD GOAL BY JAKE MONEY MOODY
49ERS CONTINUE TO STALL OUTSIDE RED ZONE
I thought the whole premise here was how to make my night. How did we get back to kicking me in the shins already?
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