NFL 2022: The Week 3 thread

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Week 2 was:
(a) wacky
(b) bonkers
(c) maddening
(d) all of the above

Answer:

Spoiler:

(d), all of the above, durrr

Consider:
* We saw two 20-point comebacks on one day versus none all of last season (Dolphins and Cardinals)

* The TuAnon people might have been right:

(LJ8 might be pretty good, too. Can't believe the Ravens lost.)

* Kyler Murray did this*:

(*=this = ran for 84.85 yards over 21 seconds on a 2-pt conversion; Barnwell has the dots)

* Joe Flacco might be elite after all.

* Speaking of elite, Micah Parsons is out there wreckin' fools:

* The Eagles might be good?

IMAGE(https://media.giphy.com/media/GJWLPWlWTH8r02HmGw/giphy.gif)

* And the Jags shut out the Colts?!

* Tom Brady got mad:

IMAGE(https://www.theverge.com/_next/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fcdn.vox-cdn.com%2Fthumbor%2FxczPDRUBICsHBZymcvI7xC_DtNE%3D%2F0x0%3A500x300%2F450x300%2Ffilters%3Afocal(250x150%3A251x151)%3Ano_upscale()%2Fcdn.vox-cdn.com%2Fuploads%2Fchorus_asset%2Ffile%2F24033742%2Ftom_brady_gif_tablet.gif&w=640&q=75)

* Mike Evans and Marshon Lattimore got mad, too

IMAGE(https://c.tenor.com/MWGftUVghSIAAAAC/mike-evans-marshon-lattimore.gif)

Evans to the refs afterward: "It's Tom Brady! What do you want me to do?!"

* The Lions? THE LIONS!

IMAGE(https://media.giphy.com/media/Nn33QzCxtSsT010BQk/giphy.gif)

* The Browns had a 99% win probability ...

... and Browns'd themselves.

* The Panthers were about to sign a QB named Chad Powers until they found out he went to Penn State instead of Temple. ("Chad does it his way. Chad likes to throw deep!")

* Aaron Rodgers reacts to Week 2:

IMAGE(https://media.giphy.com/media/WIsAoa6a8VYZmSqClQ/giphy.gif)

And so on. It was a wild week. Speaking of:

Ï'M ßÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÇK!!!!!!

No, not Cam. This cutie:

IMAGE(https://static.www.nfl.com/image/private/t_new_photo_album/f_auto/league/jj1kjefgg23sg8n758iq.jpg)

We missed you, Jimmy G!

QB RANKINGS

A new feature at The Ringer: QB rankings, updated weekly.

The top 5 (no surprises): Mahomes, QAaron, Herbert, Allen and Brady.

GET TO KNOW A GUY

If Justin Herbert and his busted-up ribs can't go, the Chargers will roll out backup ...

Chase Daniel!

* 5 starts and 71 appearances in 13 seasons for seven different teams

* Has thrown for almost 1,700 career yards, which equals a third of Herbert's 2021 season total

* USA Today's Chargerswire describes him earnestly as a QB with "an arm nowhere near the talent of Herbert"

* Was a undrafted free agent

* Has been in the league longer than Julio Jones and Von Miller

* Has been paid nearly $42 million in his career. Good work if you can get it!

WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS

From NFL.com this week. Top 5 are Bills (1st last week), Chiefs (2), Eagles (10!), Bucs (3) and Packers (8).

I'm not sure the Panthers are listed this week.

PANTHERS STATS OF THE WEEK THAT MAKE YOU GLAD YOU ROOT FOR ANY OTHER TEAM

During the Matt Rhule era (just two years and two games but feels like my entire life):

* the Panthers are 1-24 in games in which they have given up 17+ points (and 9-0 when they gave up 16 or fewer)

* the Panthers are 0-15 in 4th quarter/game-winning drive opportunities

* The Panthers are the first team in NFL history to lose in consecutive weeks on 56+-yard fourth-quarter FGs (source)

* Panthers lost in the fourth quarter on a field goal of 56 or more yards, something that had never happened before in consecutive weeks in NFL history.

Maybe the Panthers aren't properly motivated? I mean, here's video of Matt Rhule charging out of the tunnel ...

[watches video]

Actually, it's Rhule leading the team through the tunnel at a pace that would be considered too slow for both funerals and execution.

The good news is that the Panthers will be working on situational football because they have installed scoreboards at each end of their practice field. It's a trend around the league, right? Situational football, I mean ...

Sigh.

WEEK 3 SCHEDULE

Thursday: Steelers-Browns (Amazon)

Sunday early: Aints-Panthers, Texans-Browns, Chiefs-Colts, *Bills-Dolphins*, Lions-Vikings, Ravens-Patriots, Bengals-Jets, Raiders-Titans, Eagles-Commanders

Sunday late: Jags-Chargers, Rams-Cards, Birds-Birds (FaLOLcons-Seahawks), *Packers-Bucs* (national GOTW to absolutely no one's surprise)

Sunday night: Niners-Broncos (NBC)

Monday: Cowboys-Giants (ABC and ESPN, plus ManningCast, with a special guest appearance from Chad Powers)

Byes: None yet!

Coverage maps (and announcer pairings) are here.

PARTING SHOT

From the most recent Draw Play:

IMAGE(https://i.imgur.com/16KRFiI.png)

Congrats, Legion, you earned this one.

(derp)

Enix wrote:

A new feature at The Ringer: QB rankings, updated weekly.

Geno Smith above Jimmy Garoppolo is a joke, especially after Jimmy just went into a game cold and easily outperformed Geno.

This was such a tough week for me. On the one hand, I watched my two teams throw a shutout (Jags) and an all-but-special-teams shutout (49ers - Seattle's lone points coming on a FG block return). On the other hand, having the Trey Lance Era put on hold for another year is maddening. But with Garoppolo there, it feels like having died in a video game but surviving thanks to a previously stashed 1up. It is the weirdest feeling.

Nah, if we're talking in video game terms, Trey Lance is what you thought the new meta in the game was going to be but when that suddenly got nerfed, you had to fall back to your old build in Jimmy G whom you fortunately kept either in your inventory or in your bank.

Primetime Jimmy G. What a week

Rat Boy wrote:

Nah, if we're talking in video game terms, Trey Lance is what you thought the new meta in the game was going to be but when that suddenly got nerfed, you had to fall back to your old build in Jimmy G whom you fortunately kept either in your inventory or in your bank.

So, I'm... waiting for the next patch?

Richard Sherman and KJ Wright talking about how Russ wasn't held to the same standard as everyone else.

*Legion* wrote:

Richard Sherman and KJ Wright talking about how Russ wasn't held to the same standard as everyone else.

Sherman, at least, was part of the ‘he’s not black enough’ group iirc

A Thursday night division match between the Steelers and Browns. Go Team Scoreless Tie!

Paleocon wrote:

A Thursday night division match between the Steelers and Browns. Go Team Scoreless Tie!

Yeah, that's a Must Not Watch on Amazon Subprime.

Enix wrote:
Paleocon wrote:

A Thursday night division match between the Steelers and Browns. Go Team Scoreless Tie!

Yeah, that's a Must Not Watch on Amazon Subprime.

When the disgustingness of the players, coaches, and famous former players makes watching a mildly enjoyable thing unpalatable and terrible.

It's called the Watson-Roethlisberger Effect.

Mike Tanier takes Lamar Jackson’s betting-on-himself to task, pointing out the same sort of thing I have been: playing 2022 at a lower number because you’re holding out for a bigger payday than what’s on the table just puts you in the hole when it comes to total earnings, necessitating major gains in negotiations just to break even.

But Tanier of course goes deeper, highlighting Baltimore’s ability to use the franchise tag for 2023-2025, digging Lamar even deeper in the hole compared to the supposed offers he’s rejected. Quote Tanier:

Yes, this gets confusing, which is why folks hire agents.

Also on FO: Meet Talanoa Hufanga, San Francisco's Latest Stud Defender. Hufanga has made a major jump up in year 2 into a mini-Polamalu of sorts. His lack of top speed probably still limits his coverage range, but with the league leaning harder into 2-deep coverages (everything old is new again) and quarters coverages, that is becoming less of an issue.

Here's an even more damning addition to my Panthers stats from the OP.

It's just what the headline says: Team winning percentage when allowing 17 or more points during the Matt Rhule era.

That's Green Bay up there at 71%. Median seems to be around 40%. Carolina is at THREE POINT EIGHT PERCENT, MY GOD.

IMAGE(https://preview.redd.it/kifjum7tc2p91.png?width=1998&format=png&auto=webp&s=aba932baf9b712d15836da0052d74633b4c3e519)

In case one was distracted by events in the NBA, Key official pleads guilty in Mississippi welfare scandal involving Brett Favre. As Florio notes, this could be a sign that this official is cooperating with prosecutors and could ultimately lead to legal action against Favre.

Sample size is small because it's 2 years but ya that's hilarious.

I read it as having Rodgers, Brady, Mahomes or Josh Allen means you can give up 17+ and still probably win.

Tricky part for any the teams on that list that are defense first if they hardly even give up 17 in the first place so then the sample is even smaller.

This will be the week to see whether Russ truly is the 49er's kryptonite. He's looked pretty bad (for him, I'd say he's playing at replacement level overall) the first two weeks if you've watched closely.

Rat Boy wrote:

In case one was distracted by events in the NBA, Key official pleads guilty in Mississippi welfare scandal involving Brett Favre. As Florio notes, this could be a sign that this official is cooperating with prosecutors and could ultimately lead to legal action against Favre.

Favre has enough money to where this would be at most a slap on the wrist. Does anyone think he'll actually face consequences?

Who knows. Martha Stewart went to jail for a lot less money than that. That is to say I don't think it would be so farfetched that he actually gets in trouble.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Favre has enough money to where this would be at most a slap on the wrist. Does anyone think he'll actually face consequences?

If he does, it will be a Lori Loughlin 2-month stay at white collar prison with yoga and Pilates kind of consequence.

Pink Stripes wrote:

Who knows. Martha Stewart went to jail for a lot less money than that. That is to say I don't think it would be so farfetched that he actually gets in trouble.

Martha was guilty of securities fraud though. The rich don't like that.

Siphoning money away from programs to help the poor? That's just a time-honored 1%-er tradition.

Seems that Dan Orlovsky of all people has cracked the code to the Panthers offense: If Baker is in shotgun and CMC lines up next to him, it's a pass. If CMC lines up one yard behind him, it's a run or an RPO.

Every. Single. Time.

I don't think it's quite as bad as Orlovsky intimates. At least the part with CMC lined up a step back from Baker. Yeah, it's obviously an RPO, but so was pretty much anytime a team lined up in the pistol formation, and this formation with CMC offset and a step back is basically a modified pistol. RPO is less about surprise and more about putting a defender in conflict and determining the play based on what the conflicted defender does. As a defense I still have to defend the run and pass both, it's not giving that much away.

Shotgun with CMC at equal depth to Baker... I mean, OK, they could run draw or inside handoff on that sometimes, but that alignment is going to pretty overwhelmingly be a pass play when you see it from any other team too. Does it suddenly become much more sound if they run 10% of the time out of it? Also, Orlovsky's first example is them running screen off of it, which yes technically is "pass" but it's a counterpunch against a defense that is aggressively pass rushing against what they think is a pass look.

I think Orlovsky's commentary is overblown, for cable TV consumption. These tendencies are maybe not great but I don't think they represent some some smoking gun. I think it's just one brick in the McAdoo wall.

*Legion* wrote:
Pink Stripes wrote:

Who knows. Martha Stewart went to jail for a lot less money than that. That is to say I don't think it would be so farfetched that he actually gets in trouble.

Martha was guilty of securities fraud though. The rich don't like that.

Except at least 4 Congress members did it during the early stages of Covid and they haven't even been investigated, much less jailed.

Enix wrote:

Here's an even more damning addition to my Panthers stats from the OP.

It's just what the headline says: Team winning percentage when allowing 17 or more points during the Matt Rhule era.

That's Green Bay up there at 71%. Median seems to be around 40%. Carolina is at THREE POINT EIGHT PERCENT, MY GOD.

IMAGE(https://preview.redd.it/kifjum7tc2p91.png?width=1998&format=png&auto=webp&s=aba932baf9b712d15836da0052d74633b4c3e519)

Thanks for that. It didn't make me feel much better on the terrible Patriots offense but it's great material for trolling my Panthers fan friend!

Of the non obvious first round graded WRs I wanted Pickens.

So of course the Packers didn't pick him. Not that 1 catch solidifies a player but wow.

Bojorquez punting to Olszewski is certainly a battle of names.

Ugh Browns gonna win

*Legion* wrote:

Bojorquez punting to Olszewski is certainly a battle of names.

That's the Pride of Bemidji State University Gunner Olszewski to you.

The Steelers are the dirtiest team in football. I swear I saw them holding onto and twisting ankles every other play.

EvilDead wrote:

... but it's great material for trolling my Panthers fan friend!

Panther Fan is pretty much in self-troll mode these days. Everything the team does is by definition bad. Matt Rhule could house all the orphans in the world and Panthers Fan would be like, WELL WHAT ABOUT THE PUPPIES, YOU CLOWN?!??

I swear this is so much worse than the Lost Season of 2010 featuring Jimmy Clausen, Matt Moore and Brian St Pierre as your starting QBs. At least we knew going in it would be bad.

And in 2023, the only QB who will probably be on the roster is a rookie coming off of preseason Lisfranc surgery, and we're $20M+ over the cap. Good times, y'all.

Well that was a rollercoaster of activity for the west coast lunch hour:

IMAGE(https://i.imgur.com/C07Nm7S.jpg)

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