Some half-ass crap I think this week:
1. Best 2-0 teams: Ravens (Lamar!), Seahawks (Russell!). The Chiefs are probably my No. 3 here, but they came a little too close to losing to the Chargers and Blaine Gabbert 2.0 (hair resemblance only; Justin Herbert didn't suck!).
1a. The Ringer's top 6: Ravens, Chiefs, Seahawks, Packers, Steelers, Bills.
2. Worst 0-2 teams (aka your leaders in the Tanking for Trevor/Losers for Lawrence sweepstakes): Giants (w/o Saquan), Jets (oh god they're bad), Panthers (no CMC for a month or so), Lions (because Lions).
3. Best 0-2 team: Probably the Texans because Watson is so good and they've lost to two pretty good teams. The Falcons are next because they can score a ton of points. Maybe the Vikings if Kirk Cousins stops counting his money and throwing completions?
4. Worst 2-0 team: OMG the Bears are undefeated? Seriously?!
5. Is it the FAILcons or the FaLOLcons?
6. Sunday night's game was awesome. More like this please!
7. Speaking of: Cam looks great — like 2015 Super Bowl Cam, but with a better O-line and marginally better receivers. It's clear that someone in New England got Cam to work on his mechanics a bit. He's still throwing lasers off his back foot, but he looks steadier, and he doesn't spend the first quarter throwing the ball into the stands until he can correct his aim. He keeps this up, and he's league MVP again.
7a. Russell Wilson is the current MVP until Lamar Jackson's turn on MNF.
8. Monday night's game was meh. But damned if Derek Carr wasn't the best QB on the field by a good margin. (And did you notice the seats in the Raiders' new Vegas stadium? Black! Every single one of them.)
9. RIP, Niners. I don't know how you recover from so many serious injuries in a division that right now is the best in football even with a wounded SF team.
10. Sean Payton and the Saints are $100K and $250K poorer, respectively, because their head coaches can't follow the simplest directions. So are Jon Gruden, Kyle Shanahan, Peter Carroll, Vic Fangio and their teams. C'mon, people, wear your damn masks.
11. Who do you have in the Thursday night game: Team Beard (Fins) or Team Hair (Jax)? That might actually be an entertaining game.
12. Podcast recommendation: A year ago, Robert Mays and Kevin Clark tag-teamed on what I thought was the best NFL podcast out there. They split up about halfway through the season (Clark is kind of a bully, and Mays has since left for The Athletic). But Mays has a new pod now, too. I recommend both of them.
13. Another podcast rec: Bomani Jones on his Tuesday show went off (humorously) on the Falcons, Giants, Jets, Fireman Ed, Matt Patricia and the Lions and Drew Brees and the Saints. I am there for that kind of quality content, especially because he went easy on my beleaguered Panthers.
Your coverage maps for the week: Click here. It's the usual 1 p.m. in-market garbage followed by (for most of us) Dallas-Seattle.
We all get Green Bay-Nawlins on Sunday night (should be fun) and ***CHIEFS-RAVENS*** ON MONDAY NIGHT. That's a pretty fine weekend of football!