You thought I was going to make this post entirely about Gardner Minshew the Second (First of his Name... somehow). We've got 8 weeks for that.
No, this is about Sam Darnold, who was diagnosed with mono and is out indefinitely.
I went on Google Image Search to find a picture of Darnold to make a mono joke with, but when I was there, I was struck by something.
Darnold is confused.
Very confused.
Like, all the time.
There are so many pictures of him with his left hand to his head like this.
It doesn't seem to be a new development.
It's there during warmups.
It's there when the playcall comes in from the sideline.
It's there even as the world behind him fades away.
And when the hand comes down... well the look of confusion stays.
If Jimmy Clausen defined Douche-Face, Darnold is the poster child for visible confusion by a quarterback, exceeding even that standard set by the other New York starting QB.
Speaking of Darnold, we learned this week that when his current head coach, Adam Gase, was in Miami, he did not hold a high opinion of Sam Darnold. Miami was looking at quarterbacks, and Gase liked Baker Mayfield and bad Josh Allen, but not Darnold so much.
Gase also did not want the team to spend the money for Le'Veon Bell, and now he runs an offense powered by Sam Darnold and Le'Veon Bell. Well, except without Darnold for the time being.
He really does look like the long lost brother of Princes William and Harry in some of those.
Sadly, "Sideline" does not appear to be available in free agency in our fantasy leagues.
The other day, a guy from the Jags analytics department was on Jeopardy.
He did not do well.
Still no picks? 
Eagles at Falcons should be a good game. The last two have been pretty tight low scoring games but for some reason this one feels like it might be a shootout. The Eagles are looking like a team that will have to outscore everyone this year as the combination of a secondary that can’t cover Arena league WR’s and Schwatrzy playing 10 men in the box on obvious passing downs will lead to giving up 28 to 40 points a game.
Still no picks? :D
Picks have been dead for over a year. You want picks, you all gotta find someone else to do these threads.
Then what's the point of a weekly thread? Just do a season long one like for every other sports season thread so people can come back to the same place for continuing conversation.
Then what's the point of a weekly thread? Just do a season long one like for every other sports season thread so people can come back to the same place for continuing conversation.
But then I'd have missed the array of confused Sam Darnold faces...
J-E-T-S JETS! JETS! JETS!
Then what's the point of a weekly thread? Just do a season long one like for every other sports season thread so people can come back to the same place for continuing conversation.
Counterpoint; shut up your face and let Legion entertain us with the humour that is the first post!
I’m looking forward to the Browns losing to the mono-ridden Jets.
No, no, please delay the start of the game so we can watch more Farmers/Sesame Street commercials. Hopefully this inspires someone to deep fake Bert's face onto J. Jonah Jameson.
Decided to fire up Amazon Prime Video to watch TNF while organizing the TV room. Discovered Prime Video does not carry the NFL games until next week.
Meh.
Decided to fire up Amazon Prime Video to watch TNF while organizing the TV room. Discovered Prime Video does not carry the NFL games until next week.
Meh.
Weather delay, so you're not missing much at the moment.
Decided to fire up Amazon Prime Video to watch TNF while organizing the TV room. Discovered Prime Video does not carry the NFL games until next week.
Meh.
Same thing. NFL network on my PC is working though.
Jameis seems to be having an easier time without Nick Bosa and Dee Ford wrecking the edges of his offensive line.
Sack by Brian Burns though! Granted Jameis held the ball for an hour before he got there, but I'm still expecting good things from Burns.
I f*cking love watching Kuechly.
Congrats to anyone who had money on the prop bet that the Panthers would have more safeties (1) than TDs (zero).
Someone make me laugh! The Darnold photo essay was a good start.
Hey guys, so maybe Cam Newton isn't okay.
Sorry, Enix.
Hey guys, so maybe Cam Newton isn't okay.
I see an early Luck retirement in his future. I also 100% don't blame him if he does.
Eventually found a stream and watched a fair amount of the second half; Cam looks broken, and it's week two. Definitely have to give Todd Bowles credit for coming up with a defensive scheme capable of applying pressure when Tampa has no pass rushers, but there's no way a team with a healthy Cam Newton does a direct snap to McCaffrey on 4th and ballgame. That right there was a giant surrender flag for Carolinas season; if Cam Newton can't get a yard, that offense is screwed.
I am looking forward to losing to the Jets and their plague ward QB Monday Night.
Eventually found a stream and watched a fair amount of the second half; Cam looks broken, and it's week two. Definitely have to give Todd Bowles credit for coming up with a defensive scheme capable of applying pressure when Tampa has no pass rushers, but there's no way a team with a healthy Cam Newton does a direct snap to McCaffrey on 4th and ballgame. That right there was a giant surrender flag for Carolinas season; if Cam Newton can't get a yard, that offense is screwed.
The Charlotte paper had a story that said essentially the play call was OK but that the Bucs D didn't do exactly what they thought they'd do. In other words, the Panthers thought that the CB (Hargreaves) would follow the man-in-motion from L to R. Hargreaves, meanwhile, thought the play would be some sort of Philly Special deal, so he stayed home.
If Hargreaves follows the WR, McCaffrey runs past the D-linemen into the end zone. Instead, McCaffrey runs into Hargreaves. Ballgame.
I think you're right, MM, that the Panthers O is screwed. Something's broken. Maybe it's Cam's head.
Anyway, I'll be considering bandwagon invites. Invite away!
Dante Pettis today said his "body is back to normal" after the groin injury he had last week. I think they downplayed the injury last week when they left him off the injury report.
It's probably all a lie though, and Garion can feel free to dump Pettis on me in Dynasty league.
Maybe it's Cam's head.
Now, what could possibly give anyone that impression...?
Dante Pettis today said his "body is back to normal" after the groin injury he had last week. I think they downplayed the injury last week when they left him off the injury report.
It's probably all a lie though, and Garion can feel free to dump Pettis on me in Dynasty league.
Oh, I already cut him. Should be on the WW now.
Lies! I've got a nice gently used Donte Moncrief with your name on it, just hand Pettis over.
Moncrief didn't get cut after last week?
j/k I still expect Moncrief to get targets.
OBJ says players told him that Gregg Williams told folks to hurt him in prior games. I believe it because of history and stuff.
Williams had a press conference today.
“We don’t do that,” Williams said. “Never done that anywhere I’ve been. We don’t do anything to hurt the team. It’s the number one primary thing. . . . You guys are cooperating, giving him attention. Just don’t give him attention. It just is what it is.”
Of all the things he could say, he said that. He's never done that anywhere. Ooooooookay.
Enix wrote:Maybe it's Cam's head.
Now, what could possibly give anyone that impression...?
I can't stop laughing at this.
Pages