NFL 2018 Offseason Thread

Speaking of mania, the Bucs' Mike Evans just got a five-year deal worth ... *checks notes* ... $900 billion.

Enix wrote:

Speaking of mania, the Bucs' Mike Evans just got a five-year deal worth ... *checks notes* ... $900 billion.

$55 million guaranteed. Four years, four 1000+ yard seasons, and those coming from a combination of Josh McCown, Mike Glennon, Ryan Fitzpatrick, and a less-than-entirely accurate Jameis Winston. I have to imagine Winston without Evans' ridiculous catch radius is a much less promising QB.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:
Enix wrote:

Speaking of mania, the Bucs' Mike Evans just got a five-year deal worth ... *checks notes* ... $900 billion.

$55 million guaranteed. Four years, four 1000+ yard seasons, and those coming from a combination of Josh McCown, Mike Glennon, Ryan Fitzpatrick, and a less-than-entirely accurate Jameis Winston. I have to imagine Winston without Evans' ridiculous catch radius is a much less promising QB.

Yeah, that's actually less than I expected. He is the offense.

As frustrating as Winston is, he's a baller and feeds Evans. It's a shame he can't make all the throws but better than.......Flacco anymore.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:
garion333 wrote:

I can't wait for the 49ers to go 5-11 next year with Jimmy G throwing more picks than TDs. You'll be eating a lot of crow.

If you thought BORTLESMANIA was insufferable... just wait.

BORTLESMANIA was hilarious, not insufferable.

Jimmy Gysteria could well be insufferable.

I concur. Bortlesmania was us AND you making fun of Bortles.

Gysteria is already insufferable and needs a vaccine cause you can't stop scratching your itch.

The Browns did something! They got Jarvis Landry!

Guess they're bringing Manziel's noodle arm back.

garion333 wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
Enix wrote:

Speaking of mania, the Bucs' Mike Evans just got a five-year deal worth ... *checks notes* ... $900 billion.

$55 million guaranteed. Four years, four 1000+ yard seasons, and those coming from a combination of Josh McCown, Mike Glennon, Ryan Fitzpatrick, and a less-than-entirely accurate Jameis Winston. I have to imagine Winston without Evans' ridiculous catch radius is a much less promising QB.

Yeah, that's actually less than I expected. He is the offense.

As frustrating as Winston is, he's a baller and feeds Evans. It's a shame he can't make all the throws but better than.......Flacco anymore.

Winston can make every throw, except for the deep sideline route, which he is AWFUL at. So, of course, they have Desean Jackson, who is an utter monster at the deep sideline route. It didn't go (GO, HA!) well last year.

I'll say Evans isn't the offense anymore he was for 2015/2016 until Brate came on and they drafted OJ Howard and Chris Godwin last year. That being said, Evans is definitely what drives that offense, and he makes just ridiculous catches. His body control and ability to adjust is insane. As far as I'm concerned, this is an absolute bargain contract-wise. Even with a Winston extension down the road, the team's got plenty of cap space.

garion333 wrote:

I concur. Bortlesmania was us AND you making fun of Bortles.

Gysteria is already insufferable and needs a vaccine cause you can't stop scratching your itch.

The most elite passer in a red jersey since Dontari Poe.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:
garion333 wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
Enix wrote:

Speaking of mania, the Bucs' Mike Evans just got a five-year deal worth ... *checks notes* ... $900 billion.

$55 million guaranteed. Four years, four 1000+ yard seasons, and those coming from a combination of Josh McCown, Mike Glennon, Ryan Fitzpatrick, and a less-than-entirely accurate Jameis Winston. I have to imagine Winston without Evans' ridiculous catch radius is a much less promising QB.

Yeah, that's actually less than I expected. He is the offense.

As frustrating as Winston is, he's a baller and feeds Evans. It's a shame he can't make all the throws but better than.......Flacco anymore.

Winston can make every throw, except for the deep sideline route, which he is AWFUL at. So, of course, they have Desean Jackson, who is an utter monster at the deep sideline route. It didn't go (GO, HA!) well last year.

I'll say Evans isn't the offense anymore he was for 2015/2016 until Brate came on and they drafted OJ Howard and Chris Godwin last year. That being said, Evans is definitely what drives that offense, and he makes just ridiculous catches. His body control and ability to adjust is insane. As far as I'm concerned, this is an absolute bargain contract-wise. Even with a Winston extension down the road, the team's got plenty of cap space.

$55 mil guaranteed on an $82.5m deal, reportedly.

I have a suspicion that some portion of that guarantee will turn out to be injury-only. Even still, it's likely over 50% fully guaranteed, which is unusual for WR contracts near the top (only two WR contracts with over $10m annual average have over 50% guaranteed: Emmanuel Sanders, and Tampa's other WR, DeSean Jackson).

*Legion* wrote:

Hmm. I wonder if something has happened in the NFC West recently that has Los Angeles on the warpath to acquire defensive backs?

Apparently I'm not the only one that thought of it

IMAGE(https://i.imgur.com/8azXnwf.jpg)

Oh, and:

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Jimmy Gysteria

The correct medical term for this affliction is Garoppolio.

Browns just traded for Tyrod Taylor.

garion333 wrote:

Guess they're bringing Manziel's noodle arm back.

Oh, so close!

I think I'd prefer GARAPOLOOZA!

Jimmy Cholerroppolo?

Tyrod Taylor seems like a great guy to trade for in order to give a rookie QB a year or so to get comfortable. Top pick in the 3rd round is pricey, but they've got loads of picks.

This means they can sit on Tyrod as long as they need to bring along the rookie QB they should take.

Watch them not take a QB in the 1st *again* and Tyrod suck big time. Oh, Cleveland.

Edit: Oh gawd, this is a sure sign they are taking Josh Allen and sitting him.

I agree with Taylor being a good candidate for a bridge QB.

This also makes me think Cleveland was the "AFC team" behind the 2nd round pick offer the Eagles apparently received for Foles.

But let's talk Taylor because there's some interesting stuff at play here once you get into his contract. The Bills had a strange arrangement with Taylor, in that his contract technically runs through 2021, but years 2019-2021 have zero salary. There is a clause in the deal that those years void if Taylor is on the roster at the start of the 2019 period.

What I am unsure on is if this void applies to another team or not. The way I had seen it expressed before was: "The contract voids if Taylor is on the Bills roster 5 days after the start of the 2019 waiver period." I don't know if the use of the team name means that the void clause is specific to him being on Buffalo's roster, or if it means the contract holder's roster.

Those dummy years were meant to spread out his prorated cap hit, all of which of course stays in Buffalo, and in fact accelerates against Buffalo's 2018 cap as soon as this trade executes. I'm guessing that there is probably a clause in the deal that triggers the voiding of those years in the event of a trade, but it's a little detail I'm interested in seeing if anything ever makes reference to it, because contract minutiae is apparently one of my things.

Browns trade DeShone Kizer to the Packers in exchange for DB Damarious Randall.

*Legion* wrote:

Browns trade DeShone Kizer to the Packers in exchange for DB Damarious Randall.

Don't want to suggest something radical like "Aaron Rodgers should stay healthy, but . . ."

IMAGE(http://u.cubeupload.com/MilkmanDanimal/KizerHundley.jpg)

FO's QB ratings last year. Hundley and Kizer were #34 and #35 out of 35 qualifying QBs.

WTF is happening in Cleveland? Twitter is going nuts.

Kizer was at least a rookie, and playing for the Browns, and had a coach who didn't do him any favors.

I've held a... pessimistic opinion of Kizer since the draft, but I would concede he has more upside than Hundley at this point.

Yeah, Kizer has the tools to be something special, but he needed time. He's still just a moment too slow in his processing. With confidence that might go away.

MNF announcing news: Sean McDonough is out, and Joe Tessitore is in.

I'd say that's an upgrade. I hope Tess will still do boxing - he's great there.

I don't like the trade but the saving grace is if GB is trading away CBs they are looking to add seriously in that department.

That's me trying to cope with Kizer now being on the roster and the thought that Rodgers isn't playing and he has to start.

It's Friday night tell Cleveland to relax. We were talking about the NFL market at work in the afternoon. They don't even know when to properly generate news for the 24 cycle.

Enix wrote:

MNF announcing news: Sean McDonough is out, and Joe Tessitore is in.

I'd say that's an upgrade. I hope Tess will still do boxing - he's great there.

Agreed on Tessitore, he's one of my favorite in sports, mostly because of years of Friday Night Fights.

Watching Golden Boy on ESPN2 right now, and these guys aren't in the same league.

No problem with Tessitore, at all, but I think Kevin Harlan would be a fantastic Monday Night guy. His play-by-play is fantastic, and he's also got a great enthusiasm for the game, as well as a killer sense a humor.

Sure, bring in Harlan, and bring back Glanville with him

Man, with Glanville, they would be close to the classic Monday Night Football crew, with Harlan as Frank Gifford and Glanville as Don Meredith. Who could they get to be Howard Cosell?

And now the Browns traded Danny Shelton to the Patriots for a conditional future pick.

That one I don't entirely get. He hasn't quite lived up to his draft spot, but he was good once he got into shape after his rookie year.

I do work yesterday, and I come back to see my Browns are not doing things that make sense!?

garion333 wrote:

And now the Browns traded Danny Shelton to the Patriots for a conditional future pick.

John Dorsey trading muthaf--kas just because he can.