Florida News Story Catch-all

Yes. There's a bias. Rich people (or at least not-poor people) can afford to do most of their weird stuff in private.

Sorry, writer. I'm not going to admit that I'm ridiculing the poor of Florida. I also don't buy the conspiracy theory that Florida is leaving the poor to fend for themselves so the state can profit off minor crime and bizarre stories. If that writer had any purpose other than making himself feel superior, he would have found some actual subjects of Florida headlines and shown that their wacky hijinx were a result of their poverty, or addiction, or mental illness. Failing that, his article is nothing more than a buzzkill.

As I understand it, Florida has looser laws than other states regarding what can be disclosed to the media regarding the crime. It's not that these stories are uncommon anywhere else, it's that most of the time we aren't allowed to hear about them in most states to the same degree. In other words, this kind of sh*t probably happens elsewhere, but Florida is one of the few places that gives the media the ability to release that kind of detail.

And I just realized I misunderstood the topic. Anyway I'm leaving the above post because I'm sure there are people wondering why we hear about Florida man, and not somewhere-else man.

Ah, the ever popular White House role play.

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BadKen wrote:

Sorry, writer. I'm not going to admit that I'm ridiculing the poor of Florida. I also don't buy the conspiracy theory that Florida is leaving the poor to fend for themselves so the state can profit off minor crime and bizarre stories. If that writer had any purpose other than making himself feel superior, he would have found some actual subjects of Florida headlines and shown that their wacky hijinx were a result of their poverty, or addiction, or mental illness. Failing that, his article is nothing more than a buzzkill.

Yeah, what happened to "Stupid is as stupid does"? Stupidity should always be ridiculed.

If we can’t laugh at and ridicule people who are ignorant and make bad decisions, that puts the third of the country that voted for Trump off the late night comedy agenda.

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One of the best episodes.

Far Cry players know not to f*ck with a cassowary.

The contractors responsible for the painting error were under the influence of scohol at the time.

merphle wrote:

The contractors responsible for the painting error were under the influence of scohol at the time.

The real joke is in the merphle.

Florida Easter Bunny is here to beat you senseless for your sins. Florida Santa Claus' need to step up their game.

In Florida if a cop asks if there's a big lizard in your pants, he's not hitting on you.

Florida man in lawnmower DUI crash accuses cops of poisoning him, police say

Gary Wayne Anderson, 68, was driving a lawnmower in Haines City, Florida, on Saturday around 7 p.m. when he struck the parked police cruiser while an officer was inside a nearby business, according to a police news release. Police said the impact made “a loud noise.”

Police said Anderson couldn’t complete a field sobriety test and had a demeanor that “ranged from laughing to aggressive.” He also had “extremely bloodshot watery eyes,” an arrest affidavit said.

“F--- it, I’m drunk,” Anderson told an officer, according to the affidavit. “Take me to jail.”

Anderson accused police of poisoning him and asked that he be taken to a hospital, according to police. He also said he had been poisoned when he got to Heart of Florida Regional Medical Center, police said.

Test results revealed Anderson’s blood-alcohol content was .241 percent, which is more than three times the legal limit in Florida, and that Anderson had cocaine in his system — but he accused police of giving him the cocaine, and used racial slurs and profanity at an officer, according to police.

Police said Anderson hasn’t been licensed to drive since his license was suspended in 1978.

Running Man wrote:

In Florida if a cop asks if there's a big lizard in your pants, he's not hitting on you.

I got one in my backyard, but I can't afford to feed him anymore.

Florida man tries to sell his baby at a pawn shop

"Slocum claims that his encounter with the store clerk was a prank and that he wanted to place his own video on social media"

Ah, the timeworn excuse of assholes everywhere: "it's just a prank"