Florida News Story Catch-all

Since wacky news stories coming out of Florida have absolutely flooded (no pun intended) the "Post A News Story" thread, I figured they could use their own space.

I'll start: Florida Man Arrested After Slapping Girlfriend in Face with a Sex Toy (SFW article)

Deputies are on the lookout for a coordinated trio of shoplifters who stole almost $3,000 worth of champagne -- plus an 8-piece box of fried chicken.

Jake's alive in Florida?
IMAGE(http://www.windycityepicurean.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/bluesbrothers.gif)

For once I'll skip the obvious joke there. Not to get controversial, but from this quote from the 64 year old man,

“It feels scary when you haven't done anything wrong and get arrested,” he told the paper. “It's just a terrible feeling."

we know he must be white.

It's sad that he almost certainly improved the flavor.

Obvious joke is obvious.

An armed society is a polite society.

Gravey wrote:

An armed society is a polite society.

Your quote from Minarchist was ever thus.

Hey, you can really work up an appetite watching Channing Tatum!

Ah this reminds me of the old Loveline game Germany or Florida?

Adam would read some strange news story and have callers guess which place it was from.

Are they sure it wasn't just the Collector's Edition DVD pack?

I guess he wanted to grab her by her....

She'd recently installed a home security system, yet he was still able to sneak back in?

I'm not sure how finding an alligator in a storm drain in Florida makes the news, really.

Yeah, I figure kids see a couple of them when they're just walking to school.