Tell us your best dad jokes!

How much space will Brexit free up in the European Union?

Spoiler:

1 GB

I would like to build a "he-shed" in my yard for all my manly activities, but I know my wife would just take it over and then it would be a he-shed, she-shed situation.

Love it!

tanstaafl wrote:

I would like to build a "he-shed" in my yard for all my manly activities, but I know my wife would just take it over and then it would be a he-shed, she-shed situation.

That's what she shed.

Whats the difference between a little rock flying through space and a cow flying through space?

Spoiler:

One is a little asteroid, the other is a little meatier.

Alz wrote:

Whats the difference between a little rock flying through space and a cow flying through space?

Spoiler:

One is a little asteroid, the other is a little meatier.

And a T-Rex flying through space is

Spoiler:

a big meat-eater.

Noticed my dog kept coming over to me and sniffing my phone when I’m using it. So I decided to get her her own device, an iPat.

Dr.Incurable wrote:

Noticed my dog kept coming over to me and sniffing my phone when I’m using it. So I decided to get her her own device, an iPat.

That joke doesn't really stand up on its own for me. It falls flat.

Not everything works but that’s why I shared it, thanks for the feedback! I’ll see if there’s a way to make it better, or if it just is bleh.

Dr.Incurable wrote:

Not everything works but that’s why I shared it, thanks for the feedback! I’ll see if there’s a way to make it better, or if it just is bleh.

I think you missed my terrible use of puns, and maybe my response needed work...

Spoiler:

because Ipads are thin, don't have legs, and when you put them down... they lay flat...

I didn’t even think in that direction, eh heh heh. On my side of things, I’ve been on my pain meds all day due to really bad arthritis pains, now that you explained it I can see it clearly. Still I think I can polish mine a bit more, that feels a little... awkward I think the best word is.

This just happened:

My wife: Man, I keep entering "20" instead of "2020" for dates in the accounting system, and I keep having to go back and fix them.

Me: So you're making a lot of two-oh-vers?

Why don't email servers ever get hungry?

Spoiler:

They eat a lot of spam.

And if they get indigestion, they should just

Spoiler:

pop 3 tums