Tell us your best dad jokes!

What did one magnet say to the other magnet?

Spoiler:

"I'm very attracted to you."

ThatGuy42 wrote:

What did one magnet say to the other magnet?

Spoiler:

"I'm very attracted to you."

I'm repulsed by you! We're polar opposites.

What is the best time to make my dentist appointment?

Two Thirty

Alz wrote:

What is the best time to make my dentist appointment?

Two Thirty

Spoiler:

Tooth Hurty......

Speaking of dentists:

Why do dentists call them dental x-rays, when they should have called them

Spoiler:

tooth pics

Tscott wrote:
ThatGuy42 wrote:

What did one magnet say to the other magnet?

Spoiler:

"I'm very attracted to you."

I'm repulsed by you! We're polar opposites.

But opposites attract...

I asked my granddaughter to fetch the paper and she went "Oh, grandpa, you don't need that! Here, use my phone."
Now she's mad at me for smashing the spider with her phone.

This just happened.

My daughter was feeling stressed out and emotional, so I gave her a hug. I transitioned it into more of a 'face hug' for extra comedic effect, with the hopes that she'd chuckle and feel better. She said, "I don't like being smothered," to which I replied, "That's why I'm sfathering you."

Why are cis-het women who live in the bayous so happy?

Spoiler:

They can always visit the mangroves.

IMAGE(https://i.imgur.com/ciOWsI0.jpg)

I’ve got a scary math joke but I’m 22 to say it.

My therapist told me that I find it impossible to vocalize my emotions.

Spoiler:

Can’t say that I’m surprised.

My friend Pedro saw I was having a bad day, so he came up to me and said “Mucho.”

“Thanks,” I replied. “That means a lot.”