Math-y dad jokes:
What do yo call a math professor after a beach vacation?
A tangent
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can't drink and derive
Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
To get to the same side
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9
Why did I divide sin by tan?
Just cos
What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four
What is purple and commutes?
An Abelian grape
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil!
Oh gawsh I'm dying. Math dad jokes. Who ν?!
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. Bartender says, "For you, no charge."
"I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "I'm positive!"
I had an email full of sciencey dad jokes, got deleted when the account expired. 
Some bloke just threw milk and cheese at me.
How dairy.
More a math joke than a dad joke, but pretty amusing:
I did like that the video length is "2:56"
I did like that the video length is "2:56"
Reads as 2:57 to me...
I once swallowed two pieces of string and an hour later they came out of my ass tied together.
I shit you knot!
I shit you knot, CORAL!
Remember the rapper named Ice Cube? I found a current picture of him:
HE'S WATER NOW CORAL
Ice T completely sold out too (Coral)
Is there some sort of trick to the Coral thing? I don't get it.
Not enough coral jokes in this thread.
What did the clownfish say who left his home to hang out in the coral reef?
"With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"
....
you know what I was going to say here.
Is there some sort of trick to the Coral thing? I don't get it.
It's a silly internet thing 
Remember the rapper named Ice Cube? I found a current picture of him:
Spoiler:HE'S WATER NOW CORAL
My son and I have been racing snails in the courtyard. I took the shell off mine, thinking it'd make him faster. It didn't. If anything it made him more sluggish.
Did you hear about the man who drowned in a bowl of muesli?
He was pulled under by a strong currant.
Another math one...
What did the math book say to the therapist?
"I've got lots of problems doctor"
Q: What is 4Q+6Q?
A: 10Q
You're welcome
Q: What is 4Q+6Q?
A: 10Q
Spoiler:You're welcome
Hey
Hey
Hey
What's the difference between three hedge fund managers and three thousand hedge fund managers?
2997 hedge fund managers
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
I'll leave this here...
Danielle Riendeau of Polygon and Idle Thumbs made an entire game based around dad jokes!
UpToIsomorphism wrote:Q: What is 4Q+6Q?
A: 10Q
Spoiler:You're welcome
Hey
Hey
Hey
Agreed! Where's the profanity filter on this one Certis?
I'm not sure whether this one's been posted yet, but:
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese
My friends tell me I'm hooked on brake fluid, but I can stop any time I want.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but I turned myself around.
If I'm addicted to cold turkey, how do I stop?
The Hokey Pokey one killed me.
My friends tell me I'm hooked on brake fluid, but I can stop any time I want.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but I turned myself around.
If I'm addicted to cold turkey, how do I stop?
EDIT: (Because I forgot it the first time) I've spent a lot of years obsessed with speed bumps, but I'm starting to slow down.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but I turned myself around.
Part of the fun I have reading these is turning them into jokes I can totally get my wife with.
Me: "Babe, I have something I need to tell you."
She-Prime: "What's up?"
Me: "I have an addiction to something."
She-Prime: "An addiction to what?"
Me: "The hokey pokey"
She-Prime: "Seriously?"
Me: "Yes. But with your help I can turn myself around. That's what it's all about."
Then she shanks you with a sharpened candy cane.
Dad puzzle: Also true story!
Last year, a math professor announced that he and his wife were pregnant at our department meeting. He announced that right now, he has a 3/4 probability of having a boy, and also a 3/4 probability of having a girl.
How is this possible?
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