Tell us your best dad jokes!

WizKid wrote:

I was a bit unsure about having Darth Vader in the new star Wars movie, but in the end I thought he came out ahead.

Spoilerths!

Nothing not already shown in the teaser/ trailers.

so... as someone who only watches netflix, and have seen zero trailers, I guess I should expect spoilers in the dad joke thread?

I will admit, I truly did not see that one coming.

Wink_and_the_Gun wrote:
WizKid wrote:

I was a bit unsure about having Darth Vader in the new star Wars movie, but in the end I thought he came out ahead.

Spoilerths!

IMAGE(https://art.penny-arcade.com/photos/i-DwTVMBd/0/1050x10000/i-DwTVMBd-1050x10000.jpg)

Oh come on. Everyone knows a proper lobotomy goes through the eye socket.

but this is a gruesome self-lobotmy..

Is this thread still active?

No new posts all year.

I miss the days when men were men, and people respected their fathers. I'm starting to feel fathers, and men, are mainly comic relief or examples of how not to behave.

I know that's not the goal of the above post, but it triggered a bunch of stuff that's kind of been hanging around in the back of my head for a while now.

Never mind. Not even close to worth it.

Dakuna wrote:

I miss the days when men were men, and people respected their fathers. I'm starting to feel fathers, and men, are mainly comic relief or examples of how not to behave.

I know that's not the goal of the above post, but it triggered a bunch of stuff that's kind of been hanging around in the back of my head for a while now.

Culture tends to swing like a pendulum from one extreme to the other. Patriarchy worship like Father Knows Best in pop culture has given way to the bumbling idiot dad type of Homer Simpson character. Several research projects like this one have documented the shift. All this is compounded by the personal experience of the millions of people who have grown up in a society with more broken family situations than ever before. When your own father acted like a piece of trash it's hard to find sympathy for fathers in general (unless maybe you become one).

...

And a feeble attempt to get back on track...

IMAGE(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Dad+jokes_6912be_5036872.jpg)

I love the bumbling dad thing, and I read this thread religiously. I also make fun of my Dad..

I am worried about things getting out of hand sometimes.

I like the nose ring, I can imagine hours and hours of fun with young children "I got your nose!"

Need more Star Wars themed Dad jokes?

There's a twitter account for you.

(Even the twitter handle is sort of a spoiler for Force Awakens, so I'll let you click through.)

But in case you'd like a sample or two:

A bounty hunter froze Chewie's home planet!

What was his reward?

Cold hard Kashyyyk!!

How do X-Wing pilots cheat on tests?

They copy Red Leader.

Bahahahahahahahahaah

The Dadliest of Dad Jokes. (Imgur gallery)

This.

WipEout wrote:

The Dadliest of Dad Jokes. (Imgur gallery)

Amazing.

#25 is one of my go-to dad jokes. Did a fist pump.

My wife accidentally spilled vinegar in the pancake batter.

I told her not to be upset. It was just sour crepes.

What piece of playground equipment is both in the present and the past at the same time?

Spoiler:

The See-Saw

What kind of pastry does an irrational baker bake for thanksgiving?

Spoiler:

Pumpkin pi.

danopian wrote:

#25 is one of my go-to dad jokes. Did a fist pump.

You're out-of-this-world.

True story:

A colleague sat down at my table today for lunch. He asked if I had ever heard of a "blood orange" before, as he set one down, to which I replied "yes". He wondered aloud where they came from. I said "Transylvania."

Yesterday I ate two pieces of string, and today they came out tied together.

I sh*t you knot.

noice!

Someone just asked me to stop singing "Wonderwall" by Oasis.

I said maybe...

What do you call Quakers with healthcare?

Spoiler:

Friends with benefits

IMAGE(http://i.imgur.com/nKQN51F.jpg)

Hahahahahahahahahhahaha