Fellow Atheists/Agnostic Atheists - Let's Chat: Do you feel it is risky being "out" these days?

Feels safe to re-rail. Where were we? Not discouraging fabulous atheists beards, but I feel like there was interesting discussion going on before the derail.

I'm not sure whether light is worse than heavy. I have the cheek-sideburn connection covered. But the rest of the ski-mask area is also taken care of, which means plenty of shaving if I would want to maintain the serious atheist beard of the man above.

(So instead I wear a standard mirror-universe-style evil goatee and moustache: IMAGE(http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/evilspockk.jpg) Right down to the reddish color. Although the fact that it's redder than my hair is... not as obvious as it was back when I had hair.)

Yeah. Because pretending to be gentiles worked out so well for the Jews.

I believe you were talking about the various intricacies of GA, AA, GMC and other such acronyms, though the beard topic appears to be well-accepted.

Sorry, I was just trying to help. Oh, and I haven't gone away. I was here lurking the entire time. I lurk in a lot of threads.

I'm a non-god-worshipping BuJu. And I can't grow a beard. Le sigh, there is nowhere left for me.

But at least my devout mother is okay with it. My grandmother, on the other hand, still fills my mailbox with Jews for Jesus literature.

clover wrote:

I'm a non-god-worshipping BuJu. And I can't grow a beard. Le sigh, there is nowhere left for me. :'(.

There are hormone treatments...

clover wrote:
Dr.Ghastly wrote:
clover wrote:

I'm a non-god-worshipping BuJu. And I can't grow a beard. Le sigh, there is nowhere left for me. :'(.

There are hormone treatments...

There can be only one beard in this household. I'm out by default.

Don't worry, Edwin grows enough hair for the both of you.

Dr.Ghastly wrote:
clover wrote:

I'm a non-god-worshipping BuJu. And I can't grow a beard. Le sigh, there is nowhere left for me. :'(.

There are hormone treatments...

There can be only one beard in this household. I'm out by default.

DSGamer wrote:
clover wrote:

My grandmother, on the other hand, still fills my mailbox with Jews for Jesus literature.

Wait. What? That's a strange religion to be guilted into.

Tell me about it. I'm a Jesus-dodging heathen twice over! I need extra saves.

Hopefully a new entry helps.

I've been on the long, slow road to agnosticism for some time. Even at my most devout I was far more 'spiritual' than I was 'religious,' and always questioned things. I've just taken the next step to not participating in the couple events that my parents or brother would like me to attend. I would gladly go and share the time with them, but I will refrain from joining in blessings and the like if they require me asking the blessing. So far I have had very little backlash from it, but I'm also not pushing it in there faces or anything, and they are pretty non-confrontational in the religious area. I would expect a heart to heart with my brother every couple years or so, but he respects me enough to ask my thoughts and look for openings as opposed to just trying to change them.

It's a tough enough place to work through on my own, I am very grateful that the family I am incredibly close to gives me the respect to do my own thing.

As far as friends go, I'm not very good friends with the type of people who would ostracize anyone for those kinds of things. Preemptive strike there, I suppose.

My mom, an agnostic theist who mostly attends Unitarian churches, has gotten a ton of flack from her sisters. My one aunt is from a super evangelical denomination, and the other is a recent convert to the same church (Their father was having serious health concerns, culminating in his recent passing, and it feels like they absolutely manipulated that vulnerability she was feeling into her conversion). While in town for the funeral, my recently converted aunt pulled my mom aside and told her how concerned she was that "your family" (ie: my parents, sister, and I) won't be joining them in heaven because we haven't accepted Christ.

But the absolute worst was the way they manipulated my Grandfather's funeral. He was a spiritual guy. He didn't attend church, but if you talked to him, he firmly believed in a higher power (a near-death experience when he was younger really confirmed it in him). He was incredibly gentle and completely non-judgmental. When talking to the pastor (from my aunts' church) about the funeral, my mom insisted they not use several words that she felt didn't do her father justice: Sin, Judgment, Hell, and several others of the same intent. The pastor agreed to her demands. Come the day of the wedding, his talk was all about sin, fire, brimstone, and how we're all going to hell unless we accept Jesus, and worst of all "This is what Dale believed!" (Dale being my Grandfather). My sister's nails haven't dug into my hands like that since she was 8 years old and was trying to inflict invisible pain (invisible pain, still visible in scars 20 years later).

Below, I've included the Eulogy my father gave, which he modified slightly as a counterpoint to what had happened.

my awesome dad wrote:

There are some stories that live forever. They are told by the fire, or over the cradle, or in the rocking chair, passed down from parent to child, grandparent to grandchild, generation after generation, and are never forgotten. All these stories start like this: “Once upon a time …”

Once upon a time, there was a man named Dale who had three beautiful daughters. Dale loved his daughters more than anything in the world, but he didn’t have much money, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to leave his daughters an inheritance of material things. So he taught his daughters the secrets to true happiness, and gave them the treasures he kept in his heart.

He taught them that it’s better to whistle than to whine, better to sing than to sulk.

He taught them that it’s better to make a new friend than to nurse an old grudge.

In fact, he taught them that every person you meet might just be your new best friend … and if they don’t show any particular interest in being your new best friend, then you just aren’t trying hard enough.

He taught them that it’s more important to stand up for someone else than it is to stand up for yourself.

He taught them that the more you do for others, the less you need for yourself. The more you give to others, the richer you become.

He taught them that things you buy soon wear out and are forgotten, but memories you make – the smell of pines in the mountains, the sound of singing around a campfire, the sound of puking from the back seat of the Malibu – those last forever.

Because of Dale, his daughters grew up to be kind, generous, compassionate, funny, hard-working, loving women. They passed the things Dale taught them on to their children, who became kind, generous, compassionate, funny, hard-working, loving people of their own. And in this way, Dale’s story will live forever, passed on through the generations of his descendents and his friends.

This is the life after death that I believe in: the immortality that each of us creates for ourselves every day, through every interaction we have with one another, through every thing we do for and to each other. I don’t know if there’s a heaven or a hell waiting for me when I die, but if there’s one thing I learned from Dale’s life, it’s that I shouldn’t be worrying about myself. It’s not important what happens to us when we die – what’s important is what we do for those we love, what we give to those who live on. Dale treated each interaction with another person as if it were a gift to be cherished and celebrated, and as a result, each interaction with him became a gift to us. He affected every one of us in ways both small and profound, and we are all forever changed by him. Dale’s story – and Dale – will live on in generations yet unborn.

When Amy’s son laughs so hard at his own joke that he can’t get out the punchline – that will be Dale.

When Chris’s son thinks making friends with all the kids who get on base is his most important job as first baseman – that will be Dale.

When Emily’s granddaughter comes out of the grocery store knowing the whole life story of the checkout clerk – that will be Dale.

And they will all live happily ever after.

Sorry if this post doesn't totally make sense or isn't fully on topic, I'd re-read it, but it's getting awfully blurry in here all of the sudden.

Erm, nevermind. Thread got rerailed as I was posting.

Also, D'awwww. Koas, your Grandfather sounds like an awesome dude.

Don't recall that. I don't know much about Nazis and I don't really talk about them. Like, at all. PM me the reference, would you?

LarryC wrote:

Don't recall that. I don't know much about Nazis and I don't really talk about them. Like, at all. PM me the reference, would you?

In all fairness, that was actually Bandit and CheezPavilion.

That was awesome Kaos, thank you very much for sharing.

Farscry wrote:

That was awesome Kaos, thank you very much for sharing. :)

Yeah. Indeed.

Farscry wrote:

That was awesome Kaos, thank you very much for sharing. :)

Agreed. That was a very classy way your dad handled it to try and keep the focus on the positive influence of your grandfather.

The Khmer Rouge and the Stalinists were all fond of the AK-47, too, but that doesn't mean that they did what they did because they worshipped the gun. That's the error that argument runs into - correlation vs. causation, I suppose.

Hitler did associate Christianity with Aryan virtues, and Stalin thought enough of it to spend time studying for the priesthood. Clearly, the usual assertions don't fit the facts.

Paleocon wrote:

Yeah. Because pretending to be gentiles worked out so well for the Jews.

EDIT: Nevermind

LarryC wrote:

I believe you were talking about the various intricacies of GA, AA, GMC and other such acronyms, though the beard topic appears to be well-accepted.

EDIT: Nevermind

EDIT: Nevermind

EDIT: Nevermind

EDIT: Nevermind

EDIT: Nevermind

DSGamer wrote:
Paleocon wrote:

Yeah. Because pretending to be gentiles worked out so well for the Jews.

If you're referring to WWII I'd remind you that Hitler was an atheist. :)

Catholic actually. Bigtime Catholic.

Edit: Damned you cell phone autocorrect!

EDIT: Nevermind

Please continue the thread. I like(d) this thread. Tired of going tit for tat so I'll just remove my comments from this last page.

DSGamer wrote:

EDIT: Nevermind

That's nonsense. Clearly, Hitler didn't believe in Nevermind.

lostlobster wrote:
DSGamer wrote:

EDIT: Nevermind

That's nonsense. Clearly, Hitler didn't believe in Nevermind.

Was he more of an In Utero guy?

This seems like an appropriate place for this: Blasphemy Rights Day

Garden Ninja wrote:

This seems like an appropriate place for this: Blasphemy Rights Day

Thanks. That's really good and does a good job of explaining the history of why being atheists feels "hard" even in modern society.