Geek Confessions & Blasphemies


A spinoff of the gaming thread of the same name...

Never saw Firefly? Didn't know Watchmen was a comic before it was a movie? Thought Crystal Skull was the best Indy film? What are some more general non-gaming confessions you should turn in your geek credentials for?

I'll begin:

1. I think the Walking Dead comic is pretty bad.

The setup is great. The art is fine. But the writing I just found terrible. At least in the first few issues that I read, it just felt like the dialog is right out of a bad soap opera. Maybe it gets better several issues later, but it was so cringe-worthy to me, I just never kept going past the first few issues.

2. I just don't get Doctor Who

I've tried. Jeebus knows I've tried. My family loves this show so much. I wan't to love it too, but I just kinda think it's... not so good. I think the acting is great. The characters are witty and charming. But the sci-fi. Oh... the sci-fi. The stories hurt my soul so much. They're so off the wall and filled with inane plot twists and exposition that I just tune it out. At least Star Trek tried to make its techno-babble sound plausible. [Note: I am well aware of the irony in my saying that I can suspend my disbelief for Star Trek, but not for Doctor Who.]

1. I enjoyed the Star Wars Prequels and I really liked the 4th Indy film.

2. I don't hate Shia LeBeouf and think Kristin Stewart is actually kind of a good actor.

3. I think, in general, films and TV show have only gotten better and better as time goes on. I'll almost always watch a reboot if it exists, rather than the original.


I like the original Star Trek better than Next Generation

I think.

This one might be a bit harder for me than gaming blasphemies.

Firefly and Serenity were OK, I guess. Nothing special.

1. The zombie trend is not just exhausted, it's an incredibly problematic fantasy to begin with. And most of the time, especially in video games, it's used as solely a wish-fulfillment fantasy. Fetishizing an apocalyptic scenario where you're free to hack apart your neighbours, as envisioned by First Worlders who will never in a thousand lifetimes understand what those scenarios are really like—Rwanda always springs immediately to my mind—is at best saddening.

2. Serenity was a stupid movie. Firefly was a fine show (I thought Cowboy Bebop did a much better job of organically combining space fantasy and Westerns), but Serenity was basically a big FU to the Firefly audience.

3. The Game of Thrones TV show is terrible. I checked it out because the books were so lauded for their grey morality. Well that was nowhere to be seen in the two seasons I watched, pitting dogged righteous Sean Bean against Draco Malfoy. Garbage.

4. In fact, most fiction geeks go ape-sh*t over is sub-par, in terms of the accolades the echo chamber throw at it. The paramount example is Star Wars. They're fine space action movies, great special effects, singular visual design; but they're very thin stories with absolutely no meaningful substance. Untarnishable good guys fight thoroughly evil guys.

5. Add that to my total disdain for "lore". I can't even get into this. It's bullsh*t that adds nothing to an individual's life. Tolkien gets a pass because he at least was the first. Everyone else can put their sh*t in the round file.

6. Hand-in-hand with that is a related disdain for "canon". WHO GIVES A SH*T. IT'S NOT REAL. IT DOESN'T MATTER. It's fiction, all that matters is what reinforces the theme. The bullsh*t made-up facts are meaningless, whether they're "approved" or not.

7. The LOTR movies were poor adaptations.

I've got more, I'm sure.

A Game of Thrones is over-hyped, as is The Wheel of Time.

Both suffer from a lack of editing.

Wow, the hater-ade is thick here. Too thick.

I have never seen a Star Wars movie/anything.

The only Star Treks I've really enjoyed have been DS9 and the new movie.

The older I get, the harder it is for me to really hate things. I think I'm dying.

Dr.Ghastly wrote:

Wow, the hater-ade is thick here. Too thick.

I tried to start on a positive note.

I think the problem is that people are stating things objectively rather than subjectively.

Also, Gravey is my polar opposite. You monster!

Edit: For example: I think the Lord of the Rings movies improve on the books in almost every way.

I don't like Doctor Who either.
DS9 was probably the best Star Trek series.

Redwing wrote:

Also, Gravey is my polar opposite. You monster!

This was supposed to be a safe place!

Here, I'll try a positive one.

I don't care about the "lack of originality" in today's Hollywood. Most of the films I end up getting excited about are usually genre films based on something I really like. For example, The Avengers this year, or Prometheus. It seems silly to complain that Hollywood has "no original ideas left" and then get all psyched up for movies based on comic books.

Besides, I ended up going to see films like Looper and Seven Psychopaths as well, and found them both to be a delight. Doesn't stop Avengers from being seriously bad ass, though.

I like season two of Heroes. I enjoyed it, and was also fine with it preparing for a pretty good season three. Too bad season three was terrible.

I laughed at the Jar Jar bits when I saw The Phantom Menace for the second time in the theater.

Gravey wrote:
Redwing wrote:

Also, Gravey is my polar opposite. You monster!

This was supposed to be a safe place!

It's ok, I can't stay mad at that avatar!

Yeah, for some reason I feel like this Confessions and Blasphemy thread could turn out a lot worse than the one about games. Don't know why. But because I have faith in the GWJ community, I think it won't.

That said...

For the most part, I don't like Tolkein's work. The Hobbit? Never read it. Saw the animated thing as a kid, liked that. Read LOTR, thought they were boring. The movies, liked them in the theater. Tried watching them recently, couldn't get past all the running and running and running of the first one. The new Hobbit movie? Meh.

I'm not very good at math and programming. This one isn't really that big a deal cause a lot of folks in the world are the same. But the thing is, and this is the part that just eats me up inside, is I want to be good at math and programming soooo bad.

I hate anime with the passion of a thousand thousand burning suns. Japan is wasted on me.

After living through both ST: Voyager and Enterprise, I not so secretly hoped that the whole badly abused Star Trek franchise would finally be laid to rest. Yes, yes, JJ Abrams would be allowed limited access for *research purposes only* (and a fast buck for Sony). Beyond that, RIP.

Can't believe I'm going to admit this in public. And it's my wife's fault (she's the scientist in the family). I... I now enjoy watching the Sheldon Cooper character on Big Bang Theory.

I haven't seen a single episode of a Joss Whedon television show. Don't think I would care for any of them either.

I like Gravey's 4, 5, and 6.

Oh, I really don't like the common nerdy internet mashup art. (See: a ton of the picture thread. Recent Hunger Games posts, for example). Or this:

Other people have covered the Joss Whedon angle. I don't hate the guy, I don't begrudge him a single bit of his success. By and large, not my cup of tea though.

I like the X-Men, but like Alpha Flight more.

I thought Gamma World was more exciting than D&D.

I enjoy watching the Clone Wars.

Oh, and Secret Wars was cool.

mwdowns wrote:

Yeah, for some reason I feel like this Confessions and Blasphemy thread could turn out a lot worse than the one about games. Don't know why. But because I have faith in the GWJ community, I think it won't.

It's my feeling that geek-dom (and I mean geek-dom in general, not the GWJ community here in particular) holds a lot of things sacrosanct, and aren't generally open to dissension, let alone criticism. From my experience, the "geek card" is in practice taken pretty seriously by the hive mind. A lot of things (Game of Thrones, Joss Whedon, superhero movies, and so forth) are rallying points for the subculture, and maybe self-identification with certain interests is too domineering. So when an individual doesn't like the whole suite of "geek interests", even simply expressing a personal dislike causes offence. If I don't like media property x, it just means I don't like that thing—I've nothing negative to say about those who do like it or about geek-dom.

Even though I wouldn't hesitate to call myself a geek or nerd, there are rafts of things "geeks" are assumed to enjoy that I don't. I would expect that's true for many geeks, really.

Edit: Hence taking the opportunity, in this appropriate thread, to let'er rip.

Oh, and MUSICALS. I don't know if this entirely qualifies as "geeky" but considering the overlap with Dr. Horrible and Community and the like more and more often, and the term "Theater Geek", i'm going to claim it does.

I find them utterly insufferable. Again, I don't care if other people want to enjoy them, I just don't know how in the hell they sit through 140 minutes of hokey-ass schmaltz with the histrionics turned up to 16. I don't hate all the music, I can certainly enjoy a song from a musical, if it has been otherwise removed from the context. But watching the whole damn thing? No thank you.

I think Twitter is ignorant, wholly undignified, and possibly the beginning of the end for civilized society.

I don't understand why anyone would want to air their personal dirty laundry on public internet forums such as Facebook/MySpace/etc. It baffles me why grown men and women would want to get into immature, high school level, attention seeking bitch-fights by exchanging text messages of 140 characters or less that everyone can read and, inevitably, throw their 2 cents into. What is it with people seeking out "drama"? I do not understand.... Do these people just not have any real life friends?

Don't know if this counts as a confession - it damages my cred in some circles:

I like physical activities and enjoy various sports.

Yeah, I'm leaving my geek card at the door.

LarryC wrote:

Don't know if this counts as a confession - it damages my cred in some circles:

I like physical activities and enjoy various sports.

Yeah, I'm leaving my geek card at the door.

Now that's just plain crazy talk.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks the LOTR movies were much better than the books. Tolkein was an amazing visionary and world builder but so so writer.

Here are some of my confessions:

I like Star Wars AND Star Trek pretty equally Considering the online wars where fanboys hurl death threats against each other, Im considered an odd duck for liking both in some circles. I also can't understand the fan obsession with trying to decide if the Enterprise could take on the Millenium Falcon or if Kirk could beat Solo in a fist fight. If you're going to compare two franchises, why not compare acting, plot, characterization, etc?

I have trouble dealing with alpha nerds who are super socially awkward. I know that to the public at large I'm rather geeky and that I also spent a good deal of time being stuffed into middle school lockers. But try as I might to be understanding, I have a real problem dealing with the guys who can't make eye contact, think they are geniuses because they know a lot of useless trivia, or laugh maniacally at gamer humor. You know, the guys who start sounding like hyenas at heat when somebody says "and then I took arrow to the knee." Oh and poor hygiene is never acceptable.

I like cheesy History Channel shows. Sure, the basic premise of Mankind The Story of All of Us is life really sucked till Jesus came along, and then it sucked some more until America invented mom, apple pie and Internet porn. But I still love overly simplified history shows with lots of fun facts and pretty CGI. I also love me some Swamp People, Ice Road Truckers, and shows were macho Alaskan prospectors tell each other to go get wet in the glory hole.

I've neve seen Firefly, Serenity, or Buffy TVS. As far as I can recall the only Whedon works I've ever seen are Cabin in the Woods and Dr Horrible. Oh yeah, and Avengers.

I think Picard was a much better captain than Kirk.

I think pretty much all the superhero movies I've seen have been much better than the comics they're based on. With the notable exception of Watchmen, which was merely about equally good (because it's about the only good superhero comic, not because there was anything wrong with the movie). I'm not much of a fan of superhero comics, although I do often like other comics.

I really liked the third Dexter book. This one is a bit obscure, I know, but I do seem to be about the only reader on earth who didn't hate it. (For those not familiar with the books: the third one switched from the standard crime thriller format into actual supernatural horror; readers vocally hated it, and the author never went there again.)

I don't like Star Wars, the acting is wooden, stories are thin and plots are nonsensical. I still prefer the model FX to most digital stuff, but that's it.

Oh hey, mwdowns and I disagree about Tolkein. There had to be something eventually.

I mostly agree with Gravey, but I think the Game of Thrones series is okay.

I like Deep Space 9 and Voyager more than Original Series or Next Generation.

Tolkien was a horrible writer and I have never been able to stomach any of the LOTR books. He's slow, plodding, spends too much time on pointless descriptions, is awful at characterization and dialogue, and is just plain bad. I love the world he created, I just don't want to hear him describe it. Love the movies, though. Amazing creativity, but I just can't stand the way the guy writes.

Babylon 5 was a far better sci-fi universe than either Star Wars or Star Trek. Season 5 never happened. NEVER. HAPPENED.

The NFL is one of the best things on the planet. Again, sports. Woo. To be fair, I'm geeky about the NFL, so I guess it fits?

Avery Brooks was the best Star Trek captain, and DS9 is the best ST series. I appreciated the attempt to make the universe less shiny. Hated Voyager, though.

I like comics, but only read what I can find at my local library. I keep thinking I need to start really reading comics again, but I'm too cheap and lazy to hunt things out. If it's on the shelf, I read it.