A personal announcement, emphatic thank-you, and cheers to Fedora.

Hypatian wrote:

Actually, the kind of amazing thing to me about my weight loss so far is that I feel like I've dropped a ton, and that kind of makes me think "Oh crap, I'm getting closer to the point where my shape isn't going to change much any more." But then I look down and I still have lots of obvious undesirable flab--so I'm looking too far ahead, I'm not even close yet. I guess I'd let myself go further than I thought. On the down side, I think the current place fat is disappearing from is my rear, which is definitely not my first choice.

I think you might need to adjust your thinking on this. Shape and weight are not as closely coupled as you might think, mainly becuase it's a 3-way relationship - shape is influenced by weight and body-composition.

F'rinstance, and as Amoebic noted, the shape of your butt is a function of your glutes and the fat over the top of them. Lose the fat, and you think you've lost your butt. But work on your glutes, and hello bubble-butt!

Or paraphrased - Squat 'em for your Bottom!

NSMike wrote:

With respect to everyone, we're kind-of off-course from the original intent of the thread. I don't want to be a buzzkill, but perhaps this kind of discussion could go somewhere else?

Sorry, Mike.

By the way, how are you feeling lately? I know you were pretty blue a few weeks back. Are things looking up a bit at all?

Elysia wrote:
NSMike wrote:

With respect to everyone, we're kind-of off-course from the original intent of the thread. I don't want to be a buzzkill, but perhaps this kind of discussion could go somewhere else?

Sorry, Mike.

By the way, how are you feeling lately? I know you were pretty blue a few weeks back. Are things looking up a bit at all?

No. Thanks for asking, though.

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

It didn't read as snarky at all to me.

Stengah wrote:

It didn't read as snarky at all to me.

I didn't think so either. Succinct and polite is exactly right.

NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

SallyNasty wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

Speaking of which, is Hypatian able to be shamed into coming to pencon?

She's just in Pittsburgh.

Not this year. My life's a little too complicated and messy for me to feel up to traveling right now. I'll definitely plan to attend in the future.

Hypatian wrote:

Not this year. My life's a little too complicated and messy for me to feel up to traveling right now. I'll definitely plan to attend in the future.

If you can't bring Hypatian to PenCon, bring PenCon to her!

PittCon? PennCon?

Something that we considered doing but since it's so close to Ohio anyway, it wasn't really in the running.

Who knows about next year, though? Maybe moving East a bit will work out then.

Anyway, not the thread for that discussion =)

clover wrote:

PittCon? PennCon?

=)

oilypenguin wrote:

Something that we considered doing but since it's so close to Ohio anyway, it wasn't really in the running.

Who knows about next year, though? Maybe moving East a bit will work out then.

Anyway, not the thread for that discussion =)

clover wrote:

PittCon? PennCon?

=)

I'm all for that!

PennaCon

Wait, we're going pasta next year? PenneCon?

Thus, all threads collapse into this singularity.

NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

Mike, I didn't read it as snarky at all. I haven't had a chance to answer, as I'm coping with the plague. (I'm thinking of wearing a sign around my neck, reading, "Unclean.")

Anyhow, this is one of those threads where expressing your emotions was part of the point of the thread, in a way. You're dealing with a lot of major changes in your life right now, many to do with coming out. There's bound to be a bit of emotional fallout from so much upheaval (sorry for the fearfully mixed metaphors - cold meds make me loopy), and it wouldn't be at all inappropriate to express some of that here.

If you ever want to vent privately, or in more detail, feel free to PM me. I can't necessarily offer to have any answers, but I'm glad to be a sounding-board.

SallyNasty wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

Dude. This is the second or third time you've hit on NSMike. Just get permission from Mrs. Nasty to explore your orientation and get it on!

Elysia wrote:

There's bound to be a bit of emotional fallout from so much upheaval (sorry for the fearfully mixed metaphors - cold meds make me loopy)

Nonsense. It's the upheaval that carries the fallout everywhere, spread over the ground and up into the atmosphere. A brilliantly constructed metaphor!

NSMike wrote:

That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

I had half a post written on my phone but wanted to get this right. It happens.

Man, look what you did here. You took a brave step that has probably brought a lot of people together, happily, who might not have otherwise known they were among friends. I really do hope that you find yourself in a happier place soon. You most certainly deserve it.

I told the classmate/friend that I really needed to talk to last night. It went surprisingly well, even though I said waaaay more than intended.

Good infographic I found on transphobic terminology

Trigger warning: transphobic terminology (duh)

ClockworkHouse wrote:
SallyNasty wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

Dude. This is the second or third time you've hit on NSMike. Just get permission from Mrs. Nasty to explore your orientation and get it on!

When was the other time? Can't a guy be friendly and supportive without having ulterior motives?

Oh, Clockette.

SallyNasty wrote:
ClockworkHouse wrote:
SallyNasty wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

Dude. This is the second or third time you've hit on NSMike. Just get permission from Mrs. Nasty to explore your orientation and get it on!

When was the other time? Can't a guy be friendly and supportive without having ulterior motives?

Oh, Clockette.

Wouldn't those be posterior motives?

Tanglebones wrote:
SallyNasty wrote:
ClockworkHouse wrote:
SallyNasty wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

All I know is that here in about a week's time a hairy Irish/Italian guy is going to give you a hug.

Dude. This is the second or third time you've hit on NSMike. Just get permission from Mrs. Nasty to explore your orientation and get it on!

When was the other time? Can't a guy be friendly and supportive without having ulterior motives?

Oh, Clockette.

Wouldn't those be posterior motives?

Depends on which color hanky he's wearing and where.

Is that still a thing people do?

garion333 wrote:

Is that still a thing people do?

Not really, but it hearkens back to a time long distant where gay men went to these things called "bars".

Rubb Ed wrote:
garion333 wrote:

Is that still a thing people do?

Not really, but it hearkens back to a time long distant where gay men went to these things called "bars".

So like Grindr but in meatspace? Craziness!

Rubb Ed wrote:
garion333 wrote:

Is that still a thing people do?

Not really, but it hearkens back to a time long distant where gay men went to these things called "bars".

The more you know...

*cue NSMike's avatar and some inspirational music*

Elysia wrote:
NSMike wrote:

Sorry, rereading that a day later, it looks a little snarky. That was not my intent. I just didn't want to emotion-vomit in a public venue, so I was trying to be succinct and polite. Looks like I did the opposite.

Mike, I didn't read it as snarky at all. I haven't had a chance to answer, as I'm coping with the plague. (I'm thinking of wearing a sign around my neck, reading, "Unclean.")

Anyhow, this is one of those threads where expressing your emotions was part of the point of the thread, in a way. You're dealing with a lot of major changes in your life right now, many to do with coming out. There's bound to be a bit of emotional fallout from so much upheaval (sorry for the fearfully mixed metaphors - cold meds make me loopy), and it wouldn't be at all inappropriate to express some of that here.

If you ever want to vent privately, or in more detail, feel free to PM me. I can't necessarily offer to have any answers, but I'm glad to be a sounding-board. :)

Most of what I'm dealing with right now has to do with another member of the community whom I want very much to continue to feel welcome here. Nothing would be served by publicly posting things.

I appreciate the offers, truly, but this community is treasured by both of us, and I don't want to do anything even remotely likely to drive him away.

And to be blunt, but without any intention of offense, even those extremely kind and open offerings of help that I have already privately received from the community have done little, through no fault of anyone. I don't know what I need right now. Time is the common element among all suggestions. Perhaps that's all I've got. I don't form relationships of any kind with people casually or lightly, and I've never had one just... End. All of the old friends in my past that I don't see anymore, we've just drifted apart. I've never been in the situation where someone tells me that our relationship is now over, and I have to respect that. I can't process that. And I can't help feeling like I did something terribly wrong.

Edits to add some thoughts and remove others.

I don't form relationships of any kind with people casually or lightly, and I've never had one just... End.

Those firsts are the worst. Hang in there.