Conan Movie - Catch All

Pages

So, as we sat around playing Dungeons and Dragons as teenagers, we must have watched Conan and Highlander no fewer than 40 times each.

Hearing that a new conan movie was in the works, and that this trailer had been released, all of me was screaming "please don't screw this up".

I don't know about you but my Conan doesn't have Battman's voice, is muscularly huge, and though he's not particularly bright, he didn't take grammar lessons from yoda.
I guess I have to accept that what was cool for Conan when I was a teen, is not what will be cool for Conan of the current generation.

The cynic in me is worried that I'll find a scene where he claims a sword, slays the fabric merchant and sews himself a pair of skinny jeans.

I hope that I don't find myself shedding a tear while, like highlander I continue to believe that there has only ever been one of either movie made.

Didn't I read somewhere that Conan is to be played by the guy who was Ronan out of SG-Atlantis ? I was trying to work out whether that was him or not.

It does not look like a classic in the making, but then I've been mistaken before - I remember reading about 'Sherlock Holmes', seeing Robert Downey and Jude Law cast as the leads, Guy Ritchie directing and deciding that it would be a travesty. Which it wasn't.

I'll concede that I posted my opinions based solely on the bad movie poster image, and the voice in the trailer.
After looking at the website, the behind the scenes images, and the cast photos, I'm going to soften my stance.

If it turns out like the conan in the shot with him swinging the sword with blood all over his shoulder then I can probably come around to that.

The extras and cast photos look dirty and gritty; which is good. I caught a glimpse of bare breasted women in the background of one cast shot, which as much as I like breasts, speaks more about the grittyness and target audience of the movie than it does about my adolescent desire to look at breasts 24/7.

As much as I thought the lead was a little too pretty to be conan, it does look like he will perhaps be able to fill the role of a barbaian without turning it into a soap opera man candy role.

davet010 wrote:

Didn't I read somewhere that Conan is to be played by the guy who was Ronan out of SG-Atlantis ? I was trying to work out whether that was him or not.

That was most definitely him, and I am pretty excited by it actually. I think he could play the Conan role really well. He also has some fighting chops (as far as movie fighting goes) which is crucial for this movie.

Let's hope it doesn't suck!

I think we have a tendency to romanticize the past. The Dino movie Conan wasn't high art. It wasn't even a particularly good fight movie. It just struck a nerve with pimply faced youths in the 80's. I should know. I was one of them. It's not like it had a lot of competition.

Almost any half decent effort with an actual fight director nowadays would be able to produce a superior movie to it. That said, the arms race of fight movie quality pretty much means that this Conan will be mediocre in comparison to other movies in its category.

I think my favorite part of the first Conan movie was James Earl Jones as the villain. I remember him being pretty bad ass.

I hope that a better trailer for it comes out soon as that one was kind of underwhelming.

I thought that trailer was pretty bad. I realize it was just a teaser trailer, but it struck me as a very amateur effort.

Conan! What is best in life?

To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.

Wembley wrote:

I thought that trailer was pretty bad. I realize it was just a teaser trailer, but it struck me as a very amateur effort.

Yeh, I sat there thinking it was a bit of a 'Windows Movie Maker'-esque effort.

Here's hoping they use one of the Conan stories in full instead of picking their favorite bits of all the Conan stories.

Here is the full trailer. Looks like a typical sword and sorcery movie. Since that genre is rather small these days it will probably do ok with its intended crowd. I will probably see it if the reviews are good or when it comes to the cheap theater.

It seems too much like Clash of the Titans. I mean I really like CotT but if sword and sorcery movies are going to go down that path then it just seems like it is going to get old fast.

Looks fun to me. I'm there.

....a legend will rise? Really? I know Conan is *the* stereotypical "legand will rise" story but jesus, can people still use that phrase unironically?

Just wish it was being directed by someone a bit more talented. Marcus Nispel track record has been awful so far.

On the plus side the Aquilonia set looks like it was pulled right out of AoC which is cool.

necroyeti wrote:

....a legend will rise? Really? I know Conan is *the* stereotypical "legand will rise" story but jesus, can people still use that phrase unironically?

Grenn wrote:

But it fits. He starts out as a thief. He moves up to full-time adventuror, which includes working as a guard captain, assassin, and pirate co-captain. Eventually, he gathers some friends and an army, and takes over Hyboria. He loses it, and gets it back a year later. Pretty legendary for a barbarian from the north that was born during a battle.

I point you both to: http://www.gamerswithjobs.com/node/1...

ranalin wrote:

Just wish it was being directed by someone a bit more talented. Marcus Nispel track record has been awful so far.

I'm sure the game based on the movie based on the book will be badass though. Movie-based games are always rad.

Ahem.

Is this rated R? If not I have no interest in it.

garion333 wrote:

Is this rated R? If not I have no interest in it.

NC-17. They decided to one-up the camel scene.

garion333 wrote:
ranalin wrote:

Just wish it was being directed by someone a bit more talented. Marcus Nispel track record has been awful so far.

I'm sure the game based on the movie based on the book will be badass though. Movie-based games are always rad.

If you're talking about AoC then you're mistaken. It was based from the books not the movie.

Grenn wrote:

But it fits. He starts out as a thief. He moves up to full-time adventuror, which includes working as a guard captain, assassin, and pirate co-captain. Eventually, he gathers some friends and an army, and takes over Hyboria. He loses it, and gets it back a year later. Pretty legendary for a barbarian from the north that was born during a battle.

Spoilers man!! Sheesh!! Jerk.

LiquidMantis wrote:
garion333 wrote:

Is this rated R? If not I have no interest in it.

NC-17. They decided to one-up the camel scene.

Seriously? Might actually pay to see it in the theater then.

Question: Will it only be shown in porn theaters? I would need to find some. I'm sure Colorado Springs has a ton of them.

farley3k wrote:

Here is the full trailer. Looks like a typical sword and sorcery movie. Since that genre is rather small these days it will probably do ok with its intended crowd. I will probably see it if the reviews are good or when it comes to the cheap theater.

That actor doesn't make a very good Conan, but unlike Arnie, at least he can act. I'm also disappointed that they aren't working from any of the original RE Howard stories. In fact, it seems like they're straying from the Conan mythology in general (though to be fair, so did the previous Conan movies). Seems like a potentially decent movie, but I'm skeptical about it being a good Conan story. The whole point of Conan was that REH used him as a vehicle to explore the depravity of civilized man by portraying things through the eyes of a "noble savage," and that seems totally lost in this story.

MrDeVil909 wrote:
Grenn wrote:

But it fits. He starts out as a thief. He moves up to full-time adventuror, which includes working as a guard captain, assassin, and pirate co-captain. Eventually, he gathers some friends and an army, and takes over Hyboria. He loses it, and gets it back a year later. Pretty legendary for a barbarian from the north that was born during a battle.

Spoilers man!! Sheesh!! Jerk.

You've had 80 years to bone up on Conan mythology. I regret nothing!

complexmath wrote:
farley3k wrote:

Here is the full trailer. Looks like a typical sword and sorcery movie. Since that genre is rather small these days it will probably do ok with its intended crowd. I will probably see it if the reviews are good or when it comes to the cheap theater.

That actor doesn't make a very good Conan, but unlike Arnie, at least he can act. I'm also disappointed that they aren't working from any of the original RE Howard stories. In fact, it seems like they're straying from the Conan mythology in general (though to be fair, so did the previous Conan movies). Seems like a potentially decent movie, but I'm skeptical about it being a good Conan story. The whole point of Conan was that REH used him as a vehicle to explore the depravity of civilized man by portraying things through the eyes of a "noble savage," and that seems totally lost in this story.

Agree with pretty much everything said here as well.

True. He always did seem much more human than the people who considered "barbarian" a four letter word. I especially liked the story where he takes a wife.

But it fits. He starts out as a thief. He moves up to full-time adventuror, which includes working as a guard captain, assassin, and pirate co-captain. Eventually, he gathers some friends and an army, and takes over Aquilonia. He loses it, and gets it back a year later. Pretty legendary for a barbarian from the north that was born during a battle.

edited for accuracy

This looks so terrible.... I can't believe i've even been in threads with you guys that are looking forward to it.... I'm so embarrassed.

The only way it could be better is if it was directed by Zack Snyder and had clockwork nazi ninjas.

complexmath wrote:
farley3k wrote:

Here is the full trailer. Looks like a typical sword and sorcery movie. Since that genre is rather small these days it will probably do ok with its intended crowd. I will probably see it if the reviews are good or when it comes to the cheap theater.

That actor doesn't make a very good Conan, but unlike Arnie, at least he can act. I'm also disappointed that they aren't working from any of the original RE Howard stories. In fact, it seems like they're straying from the Conan mythology in general (though to be fair, so did the previous Conan movies). Seems like a potentially decent movie, but I'm skeptical about it being a good Conan story. The whole point of Conan was that REH used him as a vehicle to explore the depravity of civilized man by portraying things through the eyes of a "noble savage," and that seems totally lost in this story.

Man, the fact that Ah-nold can't act MADE the first Conan film. It made him more barbaric somehow. Likewise, the lower quality special effect also made the film grittier and I would STILL watch that film today over what is being previewed here today. This looks much to CG and frankly too epic. If you're going to make Conan film, make the first installment of his story and make it small scale. None of this one man saves the world crap. Oh, and the actor makes a HORRIBLE Conan.

The original holds a special place in my heart; probably for the same reason you love the music you listened to while you were a teenager. Nothing will ever affect you the same way.

Personally, I'm not going to go into Conan hoping for and infallible masterpiece. I'll be going in, expecting to be able to immerse myself in a fantasy world for an hour and a half, and be lead through a story where I, perhaps, can enjoy a character with which I can have some fantastic empathy (for lack of a better term).

I'm going in to have fun. I'm going to quash the expectation that it will be what the Lord of the Rings was to "fantasy writing made hollywood".

http://www.conanmovieblog.com/2011/0...

These keep sneaking past me.

Pages