Depression is ruining my life.

interstate78 wrote:

I thought I'd give this thread an update 'cause we rarely have positive updates on this subject, don't we?

I think I'm not depressed anymore. I've worked on some of my issues, accepted the things I can't change, found a purpose and long-lost self confidence. I started working on myself, started shedding weight, etc.

It's been over 6 months now where I can say I feel ... great? it's like I'm becoming myself again

I wish I could give you a formula or some tip to how I did it. What did I do... I started intermittent fasting? it helped a lot with a lot of my personal issues. Someone somewhere said that being able to do this every day, keeping focus, etc. gives you a lot of pride because every day is some sort of accomplishment. Maybe that's something I needed in my life, I dunno. I think it helped a lot, lost a lot of weight too, didn't even need to exercise.

Anyhoo. That's my happy story. Let's hope it's not just temporary, but the fact that nothing new came into my life (no new job, no windfall or new love interest) gives me hope that it's not just a fluke and that I may be done with depression for good.

Bravo to you! That is no small thing! Very inspirational and a great start to 2024!

Congratulations! That's great news.

Great to hear! Opening up, asking for help is always ALWAYS the way to go.
I had -still am- a situation similar myselfl so i UNDERSTAND

Had bad death and existential anxiety that landed me in the hospital this week. The anxiety has caused so much pain. I've been struggling with getting it under control and I believe I have a good grip on my mental issues. Unfortunately my flight or right response has my whole body in chemical agony. It feels like fire all over my skin. My shoulders feel like they are being kicked. I was screaming in pain getting dressed for the hospital.

Admitted myself into the hospital today twice. First round of nerve pain drugs weren't cutting it. Went back and got my really good drugs so I can sleep. Bad sleep equals bad anxiety which feeds the poison your amagdyla needs to cause you further pain. Cycle cycle cycle.

They are experimenting on me for what the right morphine and super steroid anti inflammatory drugs I'll need to go home.

Fyi - I started taking cymbalta for nerve pain and anxiety but that takes 4 weeks for it to work. And I had three weeks left. I could not spend another day at home screaming in pain.

Oh, I'm also studying Secular buddhism, brain retaining, meditation and complex breath work to engage the parasympathetic nervous system for rest-and-digest state.

I've been seriously re-examining my life.

The worst thing about anxiety for me is that I can find no correlation with anything actually setting off a panic attack other than being in a crowd. Other times my anxiety brain just decides “hey, wouldn’t a panic attack be fun right now?!” and I just have to deal with it.

Fortunately years of talk therapy with an outstanding therapist taught me enough coping strategies that it is no longer completely debilitating. Only mostly debilitating.

I wish I could be of any help whatsoever, but my coping strategies are very much tied to my specific experiences of anxiety. Trying to explain them in the context of a forum message wouldn’t be very effective.

I sincerely wish you luck finding someone who can help guide you to some techniques and meds that work for you. It can take a long time to find the right person with the right tools to help you, so keep trying.

BadKen wrote:

The worst thing about anxiety for me is that I can find no correlation with anything actually setting off a panic attack other than being in a crowd. Other times my anxiety brain just decides “hey, wouldn’t a panic attack be fun right now?!” and I just have to deal with it.

Not as bad for me, but I only recently realized I'm not a stick in the mud, I'm just an agoraphobe.

Man, you should've seen some of the concerts I never went to.

Apologies if this is not the right thread but I've been dealing with intense anxiety lately. A little background is I was diagnosed with social anxiety and general anxiety disorder over a decade ago but more recently, a therapist diagnosed me with OCD. I was a bit resistant to this at first since I don't have a lot of classic compulsions. I have gone through periods where I need to go back and check things like doors being locked multiple times and washing hands more than normal but most of my compulsions are harder to see. Things like spending hours looking at reddit threads to figure out what is going on with my physical health or looping intrusive thoughts that I obsess over.

I've broken out in hives on a regular basis for almost a year now and no visits to various doctors or dermatologits have helped. I've even had several pest control companies over to check for bed bugs and nothing. At this point, I'm thinking it has to be psychologically caused. So I'm thinking of starting anxiety meds but for whatever reason, I feel hesitant. I tried Paxil about a decade ago for a couple months and felt it wasn't helpful plus I was worried about side effects so I quit cold turkey. Then a doctor twisted my arm a few years later and after telling him no for several minutes, I said okay to seroquel for sleep. It helped with sleep but maybe too well so I gave it up after 5 months. I also tried Xanax on a as needed basis and that really helped but it wasn't good for a every day option.

So I'm just at the point where I can't deal with this anymore and decided to make an appointment a week from now to get prescribed some kind of anti anxiety mediciation. I am seeing a therapist still on a weekly basis but she hasn't been as helpful as my previous therapist that moved away last October. Her strategy to deal with OCD is to acknowledge when you're having those OCD thoughts and say that I'm not my OCD and then distracting myself for 15 minutes. I feel like I'm having a hard time doing that though and in general, I think skills where I sit with my feelings have a better success rate.

My psychiatrist, before he died, diagnosed me as bipolar 2. I told him that can't be, I like women.

The pills I'm on now, for laughs, if I don't eat before I take them, when I poo I really only pee Niagara Falls from that body part, it's really weird. I couldn't make it up 2 flights of stairs once so I went outside in our (isolated) yard (it was around midnight) and I just let it go. This is the 3rd different anxiety/depression/bipolar medication I've been on that makes pooing sometimes an adventure.

I'm not making light of us here... but am I the only one with poo issues with these types of pills?

MaxShrek - Not yet. The medications I'm on currently have odd bowel movements as side effects but so far I'm good.

This also reminded me of one of my first trucking jobs. I was still loading up a truck but there was no bathroom for available and it was after 7 p.m. So, I found an empty black garbage bag and dumped my business into it.

Forlorn Hope - "Things like spending hours looking at reddit threads to figure out what is going on with my physical health"

Yeah. I'm still doing this even though I've gotten a lot better at sitting with uncertainty.

Yeah, according to WebMD and Reddit, I must have stage 4 cancer and be dead already. It's really sad. Maybe I just need to take a break from the internet some days...

I've gotten better at not looking up stuff. A bit better anyway which means I'm going into a positive direction. Soon it might be just better and then a lot better.

When I worry about health or depression, I listen to Norm MacDonald stuff. It's therapeutic.