I found the girl I like in a whorehouse

Bear wrote:

I'm astounded that your penis hasn't fallen off yet..........

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

Farscry wrote:

You have some seriously crap luck in women.

Whoa whoa whoa...Nice guys who try to date classy girls but get cheated on have crap luck. With Mex's crazy lifestyle, I'm not sure we can even apply the word "luck" in this thread, neither good nor bad. Meaning no insult to Mex, who is a wildly entertaining person.

Hey hey, Mex, maybe she was just a client?

Yeah, I was looking for a picture.

Tagged for epic thread.

Mex, best of luck going forward. If you can still trust her after lying to you, more power to you, but if you can't, that's a lot to get past.

This sort of thing is the reason I've lurked here for years. Haven't played a video game since Bio Shock but gawd! y'all are entertaining.

I feel cheated by the short amount of content in the thread but I also feel like everything that needed to be communicated was. This is sensation altogether new to me.

Dimmerswitch wrote:

I knew who the author would be before I finished reading the thread title.

Same here. I thought, let's see what Mex is up to now.

Good luck Mex, you are an enigma shrouded in mystery and wrapped in a fish taco. (one of my favorite Fletcher lines)

Fedaykin98 wrote:

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

How you can post this with no link? I'll have to go search...

Bear wrote:

I'm astounded that your penis hasn't fallen off yet..........

I think he keeps it in a jar of preservatives by his bed.

I'll be sitting here waiting for the musical version of this story. Dolly Parton's still alive right?

It's better than finding a girl you like who might as well work in a whorehouse. "You're breath smells funny." .. "It should, I just blew a clown!"

niceeeeeee!

This thread is the best part of my day.

Mex wrote:

I feel bad =(

To be fair, I knew she had worked there, but when I met her she was "Retired" and said she didnt want to do it ever again, etc.

The other day she told me a story that just didn't click, but I let it go, and today I had a hunch and decided to go there and I saw her among the "girls". She recognized me and screamed and went to hide. Then I called her and asked her why she didn't tell me and she said she was just selling cosmetics to the girls or some crap.

Look at the bright side, you were in a good place to find another girl when you found out.

I heard something similar before, from the exact same person years ago.

93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

How you can post this with no link? I'll have to go search...

Yeah, I'm sorry about that. If it's any help, I think it was called something like "So I finally contracted an STD" or something, and was yet another thread whose author was clear from the title.

Fedaykin98 wrote:
93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

How you can post this with no link? I'll have to go search...

Yeah, I'm sorry about that. If it's any help, I think it was called something like "So I finally contracted an STD" or something, and was yet another thread whose author was clear from the title. ;)

I did a couple of searches and couldn't find it. Surprisingly, the combination "Mex" and "penis" brings up quite a few hits.

Here are a couple of random quotes all from different threads on the search page (not necessarily posted by Mex). I got all this awesomeness just on the first two pages:

Various Goodjers wrote:

I thought this was the Romanian Penis Terror:
I heard if you keep it in for too long your penis explodes.
I just want you to be aware when you are saying the word "penis" over and over ...
I never thought that was a penis Sway!
Is the issue that she didn't have the penis removed yet? Well, she dresses like a Luchador, maybe Mex finds that hot? ...
Staats' penis is like the village bicycle. ...
Once, when I was drunk, I wrote "Superman" on my penis and took a picture...
May your penis be filled with fiery flames every time you urinate,...
There's a fake penis on the outside of his pants.
Well at least it sounds more likely than Mex's idea. ..... Go make a friend who lacks a penis, it won't hurt, and it could lead to meeting ...
You know, when I think about it, almost as many dudes as girls have seen my penis. ... Oh there goes Mex on one of his tranny stories again. ...
Beware, Mex, of women who willingly show their breasts on the internet. ... Pretend she's a man, wagging his penis at you over cyberspace. ...

LMFAO! I think they're even more hilarious without knowing the context.

93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:
93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

How you can post this with no link? I'll have to go search...

Yeah, I'm sorry about that. If it's any help, I think it was called something like "So I finally contracted an STD" or something, and was yet another thread whose author was clear from the title. ;)

I did a couple of searches and couldn't find it. Surprisingly, the combination "Mex" and "penis" brings up quite a few hits...here are a couple of random quotes (all from different threads) on the search page (not necessarily posted by Mex). I think they're even more hilarious without knowing the context.

Various Goodjers wrote:

I thought this was the Romanian Penis Terror:
I heard if you keep it in for too long your penis explodes.
I just want you to be aware when you are saying the word "penis" over and over ...
I never thought that was a penis Sway!
Is the issue that she didn't have the penis removed yet? Well, she dresses like a Luchador, maybe Mex finds that hot? ...
Staats' penis is like the village bicycle. ...
Once, when I was drunk, I wrote "Superman" on my penis and took a picture...
May your penis be filled with fiery flames every time you urinate,...
There's a fake penis on the outside of his pants.
Well at least it sounds more likely than Mex's idea. ..... Go make a friend who lacks a penis, it won't hurt, and it could lead to meeting ...
You know, when I think about it, almost as many dudes as girls have seen my penis. ... Oh there goes Mex on one of his tranny stories again. ...
Beware, Mex, of women who willingly show their breasts on the internet. ... Pretend she's a man, wagging his penis at you over cyberspace. ...

LMFAO!

Yet none of them were So apparently I don't gots an STD (probably gonna be a long post)*NSFW*

There's also the So I might date an "escort" thread

Heh.. from the STD thread:

Mex wrote:

I erased all the phone numbers of girls of doubtful virtue

Commenting so I don't lose this gem of a thread.

TheCounselor wrote:

Look at the bright side, you were in a good place to find another girl when you found out.

To the point, plus funny.

So Mex, you went through all that emotional pain and suffering (and Piscaso-esque MS Paint sketch) and you're seriously considering relations with a professional whore? Do we all need to chip in for sex-rehab/sex ed??

Like Certis said, the world fired a warning shot and if you keeping flirting with danger, the next shot will hit the bullseye. Be careful man, we don't want to see a "My Penis Fell Off in the Shower Today" thread a few weeks from now.

Man, thanks guys, I feel better =)

It's good to get some outside perspective, the world doesn't stop. I'll probably call her in a few days, wait till I feel better. Maybe a week or more... Or maybe not, I dunno.

93_confirmed wrote:

So Mex, you went through all that emotional pain and suffering (and Piscaso-esque MS Paint sketch) and you're seriously considering relations with a professional whore? Do we all need to chip in for sex-rehab/sex ed??

Yeeeeah... There's sex-rehab? Do they send girls there? =D

In light of the past few posts, I'd like to formally welcome our new perverted overlords to the forums.

Mex, my friend, this one's for you, sorry, non-Spanish speakers

Add me to the list of people who knew the author before even opening the thread. I am alternately jealous of and flabbergasted at your sex life, with the occasional (but heartfelt) "phew!" of relief that it's not mine. Keep up the good work, you're an inspiration to all of us! Also, bottle some of whatever it is that makes you you, and send it to boogle, will you? Just not too much at once, perhaps!

I need to get to freaking Mexico.

trueheart78 wrote:
93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:
93_confirmed wrote:
Fedaykin98 wrote:

Did you miss the thread where it almost did? That was like, four years ago. Went from terrible tragedy to high comedy. Best original Goodjer MS Paint job EVAR.

How you can post this with no link? I'll have to go search...

Yeah, I'm sorry about that. If it's any help, I think it was called something like "So I finally contracted an STD" or something, and was yet another thread whose author was clear from the title. ;)

I did a couple of searches and couldn't find it. Surprisingly, the combination "Mex" and "penis" brings up quite a few hits...here are a couple of random quotes (all from different threads) on the search page (not necessarily posted by Mex). I think they're even more hilarious without knowing the context.

Various Goodjers wrote:

I thought this was the Romanian Penis Terror:
I heard if you keep it in for too long your penis explodes.
I just want you to be aware when you are saying the word "penis" over and over ...
I never thought that was a penis Sway!
Is the issue that she didn't have the penis removed yet? Well, she dresses like a Luchador, maybe Mex finds that hot? ...
Staats' penis is like the village bicycle. ...
Once, when I was drunk, I wrote "Superman" on my penis and took a picture...
May your penis be filled with fiery flames every time you urinate,...
There's a fake penis on the outside of his pants.
Well at least it sounds more likely than Mex's idea. ..... Go make a friend who lacks a penis, it won't hurt, and it could lead to meeting ...
You know, when I think about it, almost as many dudes as girls have seen my penis. ... Oh there goes Mex on one of his tranny stories again. ...
Beware, Mex, of women who willingly show their breasts on the internet. ... Pretend she's a man, wagging his penis at you over cyberspace. ...

LMFAO!

Yet none of them were So apparently I don't gots an STD (probably gonna be a long post)*NSFW*

trueheart78 wrote:

There's also the So I might date an "escort" thread

Thanks you two for reminding me of a whole lot of stuff I've done my best to forget. Except this:

IMAGE(http://img299.imageshack.us/img299/6307/gtfocopygy3.jpg)

And this:

IMAGE(http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/6889/sentienteyebrowyd5.gif)