Bold Predictions, One Year Later
The reason I like doing bold predictions is that they either end up making me look really smart or really stupid. There's no middle ground. Check out my article from just under a year ago, notice that few people were (wo)man enough to make any bold predictions themselves. Cowards.
The Nintendo Revolution will launch on November 19th, 2006 with a special edition re-release of Zelda: Twilight Princess. This new version of the game will include slightly better graphics and new dungeons made specifically for the Revolution controller wand. Fans will curse as they buy the game a second time, Miyamoto-san will chuckle as he tends his tomato garden.
Little did we know that Nintendo would drop the Cube release into December, after the "revolution" version shipped. I stand by the chuckling bit.
The PS3 will launch two days following the Revolution, complete with a new Metal Gear Solid game and"… not much else but sports and ports.
Two days BEFORE. Damn crystal ball. No Metal Gear Solid either, but I wasn't far off on the ports thing.
The Xbox 360 game line-up will be all Nintendo 64esque until Fall of 2006 when Halo 3 launches. Console sales will be hyped when compared to the Xbox, despite average numbers when compared to anything else.
Bam! Take Halo 3 out of there and I nailed it.
The PC market will continue to be represented more and more by developers over-seas until Windows Vista is released. After that we get more console ports and slightly less-buggy European games.
Hard to say. I think we had some strong North American PC releases this year.
The new Sin episodes to be released on Valve's Steam service will release with a bang and end with an uninspired whimper.
Bow before me, mortals. Tremble too!
Valve's Steam service will continue to cater to some big names in PC gaming looking to get out from under a publishers thumb. Warren Specter will adopt me.
Sign the damn documents, Warren! I'm a prophet now!
Sony's PSP game library will continue to languish until the end of May when some actual games are released for the system.
I was ... right? Loco Roco and ... hmm.
The Nintendo DS will be re-released with an updated design to compete with the sexy sleekness of the PSP.
I'm going to need a funny hat for my TV appearances.
Hellgate London will be the FPS Diablo you never wanted. Still fun though.
To be continued ...
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion will be excellent thanks to Sean Bean and despite the piggish graphics engine.
I'll take it!
Elysium will shave off his beard and the world will collapse in on itself.
One Burning Crusade beta key and it would have happened. Damn you Blizzard!
Gears of War will redefine what it means to poke your head around cover to shoot at bad guys. Over and over again.
Pyro will finally punch me in the face at E3, we all know he wants to. I will shock him and everyone within 15 feet with how profusely I can bleed.
I never saw KrazyTaco coming. Thank god.
With sweat technology finally mastered, developers will turn their attention to making games as unnecessarily like movies as possible. You thought lens flares were bad? Just wait for the extreme camera shaking and blur effects!
Rainbow Six Vegas? Blur city. Gears of War? Shake it like a snow globe. I win!
The Age of Empires III expansion will launch, no will care.
I have THE GIFT.
Fletcher will buy Starwars: Battlefront 3 just to piss me off.
He still might, but it's not out yet.
Guitar Hero: Karaoke Revolution will be out just in time for Christmas. Rocking out never sounded so bad.
"Smooooooooooooke on the water! Something something something"