Tired of PC games? Say it ain't so, Joe!
Yep, I'm tired. (Tired of being admired)
Tired of PC Gaming, that is. I've been a PC Gamer since my parent bought a shiny new Apple ][+ for me (and my sister, ha!) back in nineteen-eighty mumblemumble.
It started innocently enough: Raster Blaster, Lemonade Stand, Oregon Trail. I learned to program BASIC from a book that summer. You've never seen such stellar examples of someone's name running, rolling, bouncing and filling a screen. Then there was the graphics programming: both low res and, hehe, Hi Res.
And there was Castle Wolfenstein. How many here played that when it was new? Ah, how those SS officers could make me jump with a shout from nowhere and what a wonderful thing it was to steal a uniform.
Let's not forget Wizardry. Yes, the original one. In the box, along with the diskette(s) and manual was... wait for it... graph paper. Yes, a half-sized notepad of graph paper. No automapping here, boys, in my day we mapped our RPG worlds with a pencil and graph paper, and we liked it!
The years passed, a new town, new friends, and a new experience: computer games loaded from a ... cassette tape and cassette player? Awesome! And you don't need a monitor? Just hook it to the old 13" TV your parents gave you? Mule? What's Mule? Sorry, M.U.L.E., what's that? (Only the best multiplayer strategy game ever made! Ok, maybe second best. Chess is a tough act to follow.) Sweet mystery of life, at last I've found you! Ah, my sweet, sweet Commodore 64! I even talked my parents into the old 1541 disk drive.
(I will give my parents, particularly my mom this: they/she really did grasp that computers were the wave of the future, a tidal wave poised to upend the world, and those that understood them would be kings among men - okay, I made that last part up, but it's good to be the king.)
More learning programming, more typing page after page of code in from that magazine, snickering at the syntax errors, laughing out loud at the cumbersome techniques used, but still, faithfully paying fealty to those that took the time to type it all up. And cursing their mothers when it didn't work and I had to go bug hunting, or worse yet, typo hunting. Work work work, work work work, hello boys!
I've been gaming for a long time, is what I'm saying, and I think I've grown weary or bored or something. I haven't been able to bring myself to launch WoW in a couple of weeks other than a quick run into ZG. Even Dwarf Fortress no longer holds any sway. I did play Diablo for a couple of hours last night, and it was fun for a given value of fun, but there were so many design decisions that I now bristled at. (Seriously, why, exactly, can't I turn that item sideways in my backpack to pick up just one more thing? Is my backpack made of molded plastic and there's only one way to tetris things in there? Ugh.) Hell, I don't even want to muck with getting a C64 or Atari800 emulator working to play M.U.L.E.! I downloaded some heinously huge BF2 Mod right before patch day, I used to love the inkling of a glimmer of an outside chance of a snowball's chance in hell of finding and terminating Swampy, but, alas, even Yankee-hunting holds no allure any more. Twenty-mumblemumble years is a long time, but it's just not fun any more. Or there's nothing fun right now, who knows?
The only thing I can imagine bringing me back is Spore, so if you guys could have a chat with Mr. Wright, that'd be peachy. Even alpha code might keep me plugged in. Until then, I just bought a DSLite, I think I'll go play Tetris with something other than my Inventory. It's a lot more fun than the backpack shuffle and I can just snap the case shut and it's there waiting for me when I get back.
P.S. No, you may NOT have my graph paper, I might need it! Hey, get out of that box! You don't even know what Raster Blaster is!