So I think I'm going to get married...

Yeah, so... I think I'm going to be a gamer with a job and a wife. Which is odd for me to say. My dilemma arises because I know nothing about jewelry. So, if someone could give me a little suggestion about a ring I would appreciate it. Bear in mind, I have no extra money because I start graduate school in August. If anyone has any helpful hints I'd appreciate it.
Thanks,
Lester King

Others here advised to ask in your family if there''s any heirloom sort of jewelry in possesion which they won''t be too tight to pass on. This might work out wonderfully.

Congratulations! It''s traditional to give your honey a giant rock, but both me and my fiancee were very happy with the cheap amethyst/white gold ring we got at Ice.com. We occasionally tell people that it''s a special ""Blue Diamond"".

On an somewhat relevant note, diamonds are not nearly as rare as, say, rubies, and their market value is basically being artificially inflated by the deBeers cartel. They''re an awful ""investment"" (in all likelihood, you''ll only be able to sell it less than the wholesale value), and may actually decline in value as deBeers slowly loses control of the diamond market and flawless imitation diamonds arrive in quantity. Buyer beware...

Macgilla Gorrilla.800 has a good eye-dea.

If you have to pay, however, don''t go for size. 14k gold and a small, brillant stone, are better that a big, but dull, stone set in platinum.

A clear stone, say ~1kt, brilliant cut, sets you back about $4-6,000 in NYC.

It kinda depends on the type of girl. Do you know if she likes to follow tradition, just for the tradition of it? If so, get her a simple, clear diamond solitare in a gold/gold-ish setting, in either a princess or round cut.

If she is more of a comtemporary kind of girl, she''d probably like a platinum/white gold ring, or enjoy a different kind of cut like heart-shaped (harder to find affordably than others) and color, or maybe a cheaper diamond accented with smaller stones of her brithstone or favorite color, something meaningful, but not nessicarily the cliche-tradition.

Me, personally, although I''m a liberal kind of girl, I wanted a traditional gold ring with a round diamond in it, and also wanted traditional things at the wedding ceremony. If DH had gotten me a family heirloom, I would have appreciated the gesture, but somewhere down the line would have wanted more of my ""own"" thing. But that''s just me, and I wanted more almost cliche type things - you know, ask my father for my hand in marriage, that sort of thing.

Gratz!

First off, dont pay 3 months pay for a ring!

Hopefully you have a girl who loves you for you and not what you can buy.

When I got married I was going through a job change. My wife did not care how much the ring cost as long as it was from me to her.

Hopefully that can be the same for you...umm..the ring part, no tthe job...

For myself, I looked at the kind of rings Karla had in her jewelry box before I went anywhere. If you''re going to ""borrow"" a ring so you can get the right size make sure it''s one she wears on her ring finger, I grabbed one she wore on her middle finger for sizing. Whoops! They resized it the day I gave it to here though, that was nice.

Anyways, look at what she wears and keep that in mind as you go store hopping. Try to be open to new ideas and let yourself be inspired if you find something interesting or out of the ordinary. Neither Karla nor myself liked giant diamonds on rings so I got her a platinum band with a gold lozenge on it and a really small diamond in the middle. I''ll see if I can dig up a pic..

I ended up spending about 1/3 of what I intended to spend, and was much happier than if I''d gone with something traditional (and my wife was much happier).

I designed the ring myself. Now before you start going ""hey, whoa, that''s way beyond me"" I was pretty much where you were. A friend of my wife''s took me to a jeweler who does custom work and I went through all of the stuff they had and got ideas. I eventually designed my own celtic knot pattern (after searching and looking at celtic knots for 3 weeks on internet), and got her ring size (through her friend, not directly. this somehow makes it still a surprise). The artisan figured out based on her ring size and my knot pattern, how to make it go around the band continuously. I was thinking at the time that I also had to figure out how to get a ""rock"" onto it. But then I saw the design in wax that the artisan had carved. The made a mold from it, and created it from white gold.

Beautiful. Designed by me (many, many wife/fiance points for that). And I think it cost me ~$800. I would have spent much, much more than that, but it turned out to be what I wanted to do. We''re sort of non-traditional, my wife and me.

So I would first ask yourself how traditional your fiance is. Something you design can be much more personal, beautiful, and as it turns out even less expensive. Call around the jewelers in town, and see if any of them do custom work. If nothing else, they''ll have photo catalogues of custom stuff they''ve done (like a portfolio really) and you can get an idea of whether they do good work.

My wife really liked the 3 stone ""Past, Present, Future"" diamond rings, they have smaller individual stones rather than one big stone, but they look really nice. Hers is white gold and we got it at Zales. It also had tiny diamonds coming out from the 3 larger diamonds so it really sparkles. She loves her ring and she gets compliments on it all the time. Here is what it looks like.

As you can tell, I took my wife shopping for rings and watched her reactions to the different type of rings we saw, and those were her favorite so that''s what I got. A tip though, if you want the type of ring you get for her to be a surprise, be sure to keep looking for more even though you may have already decided on one, just to keep her guessing. My method may not be very traditional, but it worked for us!

Roo''s idea is excellent!

Here''s a shot of Karla''s ring, she still wears it above her wedding ring:

IMAGE(http://www.gamerswithjobs.com/images/ring.jpg)

I didn''t design it myself but it was so perfect for her I almost wonder if she snuck in ahead of me at some point and planted it.

I financed my engagement ring. In fact it was my first credit of any kind, so I wasn''t able to borrow enough to pay for the whole thing, but had enough cash to cover the difference. Just kept up with the payments, and when a big chunk of money came by, I paid it off.

Like was said before, don''t worry about the size, but diamonds are nice. Of course they''re going to sparkle, but I went with the one that sparkled to my liking

Here''s a neat little piece of advice I didn''t know about. You can use the engagement ring for the wedding ring also! I was all worried about having to buy another ring. I''m so naieve sometimes.

"Certis" wrote:

IMAGE(http://www.gamerswithjobs.com/images/ring.jpg)

So Sauron gave up trying on getting the One Ring and made a new one fashioned in his likeness.

Hehe... it does look kind of like the Eye, doesn''t it?

"karmajay" wrote:

When I got married I was going through a job change. My wife did not care how much the ring cost as long as it was from me to her.

I didn''t know there were women like that in the world. I''m hanging out in the wrong places, I guess.

that ring over there is worth the Andruil sword she gave him the other day.

Or was it Elysium?

Congratulations!! I bought a pretty inexpensive but pretty ring for my wife...Less than a carat, but the cut was wide and flat, so the diamond looks bigger and really sparkles. I think if you go to a real jeweler (as opposed to a mass-market outfit) they can help you get the most quality cut for your money.

What if I told you we got married in a sports bar also? hehe

Yep Im lucky...

"Gorilla.800.lbs" wrote:

Others here advised to ask in your family if there''s any heirloom sort of jewelry in possesion which they won''t be too tight to pass on. This might work out wonderfully.

This is what we did at first, as we married while I was still in school and broke. Once I was out of school and broke, we got a ring with a good stone for free from her sister (leftover from her first of three marriages) and had the diamond removed & used to make a custom ring. I have a plain white gold band. Our total outlay was under $500.

If you can''t pull off something like that, look for a jewelry district if there''s one in your area. We went to a random jeweler in the Los Angeles Jewelry District for my band, and it was about $100 there versus the $200+ that most stores wanted. It is even a ComfortFit (tm).

Actually, the ring is worth more than Anduril - it''s platinum. I don''t get many compliments on it, but then most people think ""engagement ring"" and envision some giant rock stuck on a gold band. Bleah.
I love my ring. It''s a testament to how well Shawn knows me.

Possibly a better angle:

IMAGE(http://www3.mb.sympatico.ca/~spleen/ring.gif)

Karla

"Druidpeak" wrote:

Here''s a neat little piece of advice I didn''t know about. You can use the engagement ring for the wedding ring also! I was all worried about having to buy another ring. I''m so naieve sometimes.

Did that
My wife is left handed, and was dropping hints to me that she didn''t want some huge rock on her left hand because it makes it hard to write. So, I got her what was actually a wedding band to act as the engagement ring. Then, on our wedding day, it became the wedding band. Clever, eh?

So yeah, I was somehow able to piece together the many blatantly obvious clues, when I conceived the design of the ring (on a piece of paper), took it to a small local jeweler, and he hooked me up somethin'' fierce. It helps that I got a healthy discount since my brother works for him too

From another practical standpoint, it makes sense to only have one ring. I know several fellows who complain that their (now) wife hardly ever wears their engagement ring anymore as the wedding band has taken up that slot on their hand. ""All this money I spent (or still owe), and she wears the wedding band?!"" That ""three months'' salary"" ""guideline"" is crap. Nobody should spend that much on a ring, ever. If you can afford a $20k ring more power to you, but it had better not be three months of your stinkin'' salary.

Wow! thanks for all the suggestions guys. I think I''m going to go with a simple gemstone ring. As far as spending 3 month''s salary on a ring... being unemployed that makes things very easy... what''s 3 times 0... hm... but regardless I appreciate the help.

"hoochie" wrote:

Actually, the ring is worth more than Anduril - it''s platinum.

Sure, but where are the flashy flame effects in platinum? Where''s the crackle of blue lighting as your platinum strikes a foul demon?

You probably shouldn''t get married while unemployed.
Just a ... gut feeling.

This place has yellow synthetic diamonds for sale. I think other colors are OTW. (Wife wants a blue one.)

http://www.accendocollection.com/

Cheaper and you avoid that blood diamond moral issue and you don''t give cash to deBeers whom I hear has a pretty scummy reputation.

Personally I think these are cooler than the natural ones. I mean, damn, in a lab we can make perfect diamonds in under a month?

You probably shouldn''t get married while unemployed.
Just a ... gut feeling.

Lol, perhaps I should explain. I''m not unemployed so much as in-between jobs. My new job will be ready for me next week, the unemployed thing is mostly a joke with my family.