Employee Profile: Seth

Nicely Job, Roundey Bladey!

Employee Profiles are back! This week we are proud to present, for your loving scrutiny, GWJ's indigenous specimen of Seth.

For three years in a row, Seth has been voted Goodjer Most Likely to see their Profile Appear in a Contemporary Art Gallery by his peers, many of whom are dazzled day after day by the literalism Seth applies to familiar signifiers such as 'Tag' and 'Avatar'. It is hard to win an argument with a man who has approached and tested the boundaries of what a forum profile can be, and smashed right through these conventional understandings on his way to postmodern superstardom. Those who have tried have been crushed and scattered throughout the P&C threads Seth leaves in his wake, slowly drifting back to their confidence like light sugar dusting on a bowl of corn flakes.

Enough rambling! I am trying to fill space here to balance against the supersized photo that Seth provided, but clearly it would take hours to punch out the text that might prove a match for this graceful, sanguine, really very large, image. Seth's big huge eyes compel us. His words call to us; let us heed!

1. Who the devil are you?

I'm so pleased that you asked! I'm a 27 year old married codger with too many opinions and not nearly enough self control. I also have a disturbing difficulty reconciling my real life personality with my online personality. Or so I think.

2. What are you supposed to be doing during the day when you're reading GWJ?

Endless conference calls, it seems. I'm currently a Sales Analyst working on the corporate banking side of a medium-to-large American bank. No, I do not work in loans or credit, so when you blame me for TARP, you're missing the target by at LEAST one office. Basically I make advertising presentations for Treasury Ma... wow, even I'm already bored.

3. How about family? Kids? Pets? Particularly meaningful inanimate objects?

No kids, but there are two miniature dachshunds, which are a lot like furry toddlers you know. If you took your toddlers outside every couple hours in the cold and make them poop outside. There's also Shelly, the painted turtle who just turned 21 years old this August. Plans to replace his water with vodka were swiftly nixed.

4. What was your favorite game over the last year or so? Why?

I... umm. I admit that it takes a whole lot of hype for me to get into a game. Favorite game over the last year that I played was Super Street Fighter IV -- it's the first game to reliably keep me away from the WoW crack for any extended period of time.

5. Which game are you looking forward to most?

Oh, the Star Wars MMO (SW:TOR). No question.

6. What is your fondest gaming memory?

Dominating a given Counterstrike map without a single death for an entire 30 minute rotation. Unfortunately I'm just not that good anymore.

That, or doing World of Warcraft's Zul'Aman's 45 minute 'bear mount' run with a scrappy group of people in nothing but Tier 4 and badge gear. We really did something Blizzard hadn't intended.

7. What is your most embarrassing gaming memory? If you hold back, we'll know.

During my years as a raid leader, I ocassionally get so excited when we do something impressive or so flustered when I attempt to explain an encounter that I make up words. Ask someone how "Nicely Job" or "Roundey Bladey" became standard terms in my guild's lexicon.

8. Finally, why do you play games at all? Why haven't you outgrown them?

Oh, look at you getting all philosophical! I find video games to be the natural and inevitable evolution of entertainment. From silent movies and radio to television and movies, from poetry to pop music, only video games let a creative artist harness the ability to allow the audience to truly be a member of the artist's creative efforts. Interactive media just seems like the natural progression of all things entertainment. So it's not really a matter of outgrowing them -- it's a matter of growing into them.

9. Thanks for taking the time to answer our hard hitting questions! Any last words?

Why, are you going to kill me now?

Ed note: No!

Spoiler:

Yes.

Comments

The spoiler has created suspense! What is going to happen!?!

I'm disappointed that all the questions weren't responded to with "[Answer]."

I think somebody needs to say something inflammatory to mark this special occasion.

I'm just proud to have made Seth's avatar. It's my glancing encounter with greatness.

He's WAY LAMER in Real Life(tm), folks.

And that's saying a lot.

I finally have a picture of Beisbol that I can photoshop endlessly!

What? No mentions (pics) of the hot wife? Clemenstation should be fired!

Bear wrote:

I finally have a picture of Beisbol that I can photoshop endlessly!

If I recall, you were THERE for the invention of the Roundey bladey! =)

And Elliotx has the right of it. A better time for Seth based flames has never been had. hint: I enjoyed Dracula 2000.

HedgeWizard wrote:

What? No mentions (pics) of the hot wife? Clemenstation should be fired!

Yeah, I was expecting at least 90% of the questions to be about seeing more pics of his wife. But alas . . .

No slight on Seth, but you know the site is getting big when you don't even recognize the employees being profiled.

Alien13z wrote:

No slight on Seth, but you know the site is getting big when you don't even recognize the employees being profiled.

Well they can't all have scary alien clown avatars that give children nightmares for weeks.

I don't see why not. If we can all have scary rubick's cube bra monkey bnpederson avatars, we can do pretty much anything.

Quintin_Stone wrote:

I don't see why not. If we can all have scary rubick's cube bra monkey bnpederson avatars, we can do pretty much anything.

Yeah and what's amazing is how long they've stuck around.

Seth wrote:

If I recall, you were THERE for the invention of the Roundey bladey! =)

It's a story I plan to tell my grandchildren.

"Kid's, did I ever tell you about the time I was in this raid with a transgendered druid......."

I enjoyed Dracula 2000.

Who the hell let you on the internet? I am indignant and enraged!

*disclaimer: I have never actually seen Dracula 2000

PyromanFO wrote:
I enjoyed Dracula 2000.

Who the hell let you on the internet? I am indignant and enraged!

*disclaimer: I have never actually seen Dracula 2000

You don't need to. The title alone should give you hints about how bad it is. (Hint: generic.)

Oh, and where the f- are more pics of Seth's wife. I mean, this profile post would be getting a lot more love if his ugly mug was removed and replaced by one of his wife's modeling pics.

And to resurrect another Sethism: when did Alan Tudyk start posting on GWJ?

Where are the old pics of her? Someone put 'em here so's I don't have to dig through some 500 page picture thread.

Also, grrrr employee profile not me fire burn hate!

Alright now, where're the pics?

Hey that's not me!

*Legion* wrote:

Where are the old pics of her? Someone put 'em here so's I don't have to dig through some 500 page picture thread.

Also, grrrr employee profile not me fire burn hate!

Alright now, where're the pics?

The Post a Picture of Yourself thread. I doubt you go there that often seeing how I've never seen one of you.

IMAGE(http://img.skitch.com/20091009-bx8ycpbkn894g6gg28tx3qsa3f.jpg)

Pot, meet Kettle. I think you'll find you have much in common.

Rat Boy wrote:

The Post a Picture of Yourself thread

En route!

I doubt you go there that often seeing how I've never seen one of you.

And you won't until my employee profile! I gave them a picture the time they sent me the profile questionnaire that they never posted.

[congratulations and fond ribbing]

Spoiler:

Ribbing, for her pleasure.

You really pulled a picture off Facebook, nicely jobbed sir.

Alexander wrote:

You really pulled a picture off Facebook, nicely jobbed sir.

I am not an attractive man. this is the best it gets.

Seth wrote:
Alexander wrote:

You really pulled a picture off Facebook, nicely jobbed sir.

I am not an attractive man. this is the best it gets.

I don't know, I found this picture attractive.

IMAGE(http://www.tvfanatic.com/files/alan-tudyk.jpg)

(I know, I know, the Tudyk card's been played already.)

Shouldn't this article look like this?:

Seth wrote:

1. Who the devil are you?

Answer to question 1.

2. What are you supposed to be doing during the day when you're reading GWJ?

Answer to question 2.

3. How about family? Kids? Pets? Particularly meaningful inanimate objects?

Answer to question 3.

4. What was your favorite game over the last year or so? Why?

Answer to question 4.

5. Which game are you looking forward to most?

Answer to question 5.

6. What is your fondest gaming memory?

Answer to question 6.

7. What is your most embarrassing gaming memory? If you hold back, we'll know.

Answer to question 7.

8. Finally, why do you play games at all? Why haven't you outgrown them?

Answer to question 8.

9. Thanks for taking the time to answer our hard hitting questions! Any last words?

Answer to question 9.

I question your dedication to the art of genericness, Seth, and I never thought I would say that...

Clemenstation, I think the profiles would be more interesting if the questions varied more.

*Legion* wrote:

And you won't until my employee profile! I gave them a picture the time they sent me the profile questionnaire that they never posted.

That was a long time ago. I'm sure you're completely bald by now.

Rat Boy wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

And you won't until my employee profile! I gave them a picture the time they sent me the profile questionnaire that they never posted.

That was a long time ago. I'm sure you're completely bald by now.

Hey! I'm being proactive instead of waiting for my head to Hasselbeck.