Sway Speaks - Reader Reviews!


I just wanted to take a moment to thank all of the armchair reviewers out there who are doing their best to help us make educated consumer decisions. Perhaps my favorite reviews are for the games that have yet to actually be released. I thought I'd offer a few of these to you to help distribute the vital information that these gamers felt compelled to share.

Please note that I found these customer reviews on Amazon.com. As I don't want to be accused of stealing their content, I wanted to make it clear that these are directly from their fine Customer Reviews.
Reviewer: jay from USA
(...) thats actually a quarter of a lvl out of like ummm 20? around that, and yeah halo 2 is o­n xbox live and will prolly come out o­n XBC ( xbox connect, a program to connect games that wont go o­nline and do, need a router for this program, with this program u can go o­nline with halo 1 and play against ppl in the US, canada, europe and asia). ok, also doom 3 and halo 2 will have the same graphics and doom 3 will be realised in may cause their a lil behind. they also use lighting effic in halo 2 and also o­nline they got computer vs people ( aka people whos playing as the master cheif ). so yeah, people say it might not be the game of the year b/c other games will have the lighting effic

Jay knows his Halo. I'm not sure what the (...) refers to. I couldn't find an earlier post by him that he may have been continuing. My spellchecker suggests that "effic" might be a misspelling of "efficacy" which may, in fact, be true. Halo 2 is supposed to have superior lighting efficacy, but don't be surprised if, as people say, it might not be the game of the year. Perhaps another anticipated sequel of 2004 will?

Reviewer: CHASE HUNT from Louisiana,MO
OMG Half-life changed gaming forever and the mods and skins you got to pick were so awesome ^_^ but if half-life did that Half-life2 is sure to knock the socks right off your feet i can almost asure you that half-life2 is going to be the best new fps around seeing as how much half-life rocked i cant wait for this o­ne ive been waiting forever for this to come out so what who cares if you need a fast pc its worth it for the Ultimate computer game if you already have the half-life collection then this is The thing to put at the top of your list its gonna rock!

CHASE is a true believer. This stream of consciousness might be a little long to fit o­n the game box, but it is quite a glowing review. Be sure to tie your shoes before playing as your feet are in danger of spontaneously disrobing. If you're worried these sequels might be a little too "extreme" for you, I found a customer review of an upcoming game oft-chided by the "hardcore gamers" community.

Reviewer: yan from ny
THIs game is very very very good WELl for o­ne u can have more then 2 floors which is most sims fan's dream and i dont know i even think u can make a basement!!!!! well o­ne of the cool things iz that now u have more objects i think there's about 500 objects in the whole game better then the "SIMS", plus making skins and a body is now a liltle MORE then it used to be like now YOu can pick head,skin more of them not so aDgy and Ugly shoes cloth and MORE way more and u can have AGE TIME WHICH is VERY vERY GANGSTA plus the age goes like this baby kid teen adult and GRAND FAZA well then THEY DEI MAHAHA MAHA well the graphic's are like most of the game freakz fan dream and some fanz i dont know but when it come'z out i want it !!!! I DO HAVE ALL THE OTHER o­nEZ :);) so THE game iz reallly really fun o­nly u cant HAVE petz :'( for those small kidz the game is realy COZE so itz not like itz really rated T 4 teen so Well i hote u get the game when it comez out u might waNA MAKE DNA the game come's out in 2004 i realy dont wana wait !! but i have to unless u wana get the boot leg o­ne (IF ITZ NOT IN STORE"Z ITZ FAKE !!!) well IF U WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE GAME GET IT IN A FEW MOUNTHZ

Although he gave it 5 stars, I'm still a little lost regarding the actual translation of this o­ne. He seems to make some anti-piracy plea o­n behalf of software manufacturers toward the end, but that doesn't seem to be Sims-specific. I'm guessing that "VERY vERY GANGSTA" is a good thing. I think yan may be making the suggestion to while away the time until the release date by procreating when he says "u might waNA MAKE DNA". Frankly this o­ne is just perplexing. If you have any insight into what he may be trying to communicate, please don't hesitate to post.


good god....thanks sway. Always a good read.

my fave is from the first one:

(aka people whos playing as the master cheif)

I think we have a few of these people 'round here.

meaning, people whos playing as themaster cheif....or something....something...

Halo2 roCks THA GANGSTA betr then SiMsII. yan from ny SuXXorS.

Awesome article.

My spellchecker suggests that "effic" might be a misspelling of "efficacy" which may, in fact, be true. Halo 2 is supposed to have superior lighting efficacy

He probably meant "effigy". I hear Halo 2 is going to have an awesome lighting effect for burning effigies.

I look forward to the day that ^_^ becomes an excepted punctuation mark.

Actually, it's a contracted version of "effictionate" -- a derogatory term used by historians.

I think he's saying 'effects'.

u might waNA MAKE DNA

I'm pretty sure that's a euphamism for sex. Or running your own cloning lab. I don't think the reviewer is getting either anytime soon so I'm not sure we need to worry about it.

I'm pretty sure ^_^ is already standard punctuation in Korean.

My head hurts now.

u might waNA MAKE DNA

Sure to be the hot pick-up line of 2004. Thanks Yan!

I'm a huge fan of people who review games that haven't even come out.

I'm a huge fan of websites that let people review games that haven't even come out.

u might waNA MAKE DNA

Sure to be the hot pick-up line of 2004. Thanks Yan!

Make sure you start shouting half way through it though.

i think he's try to say "feces" but he can't eek it out.

I'm going to try that line tonight; "You wanna make some DNA?"

My problem is that sites let people review a game before it is out. I wouldn't let reader reviews show up until the game has been out for two weeks.