NFL 2011 Week 7

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With the next pick in the draft, the Oakland Raiders select...nobody, at this rate. Anyway...

Panthers 17 - Falcons 31: This is probably the worst loss for Carolina in the Cam Newton Era. I say that being fully aware that there are plenty of losses to choose from.

Colts 17 - Bengals 27: And somewhere right now, Andy Dalton is quietly smirking about his chances for creeping into the rookie of the year conversation.

Niners 25 - Lions 19: This game has been talked about to death. Quick, someone caption this photo:

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

Rams 3 - Packers 24: Yeah, Green Bay is still the team to beat. Bar none, hands down, yadda yadda yadda.

Bills 24 - Giants 27: Admit it. You were all waiting for Eli to throw a pick six at the end of the game.

Jaguars 13 - Steelers 17: Did Pittsburgh suddenly decide to call it a day after the first quarter?

Eagles 20 - Redskins 13: Thanks to Harbaugh and Schwartz debating the merits of tasting great versus being less filling, no one's going to be taking shots at Andy Reid this week. Shanahan, on the other hand.

Browns 17 - Raaaaaaaaaaiders 24: I'm pretty sure when Al Davis said, "Just win, baby," he didn't mean lose your starting quarterback in the process. And give up all your draft picks to get a replacement

Texans 14 - Ravens 29: I'm also pretty sure Baltimore and John Harbaugh enjoy not being talked about as they quietly lead the AFC North.

Cowboys 16 - Patriots 20: They need to make one of those posters where someone is given a piece of advice and then promptly ignores it. In this case, it'd be Jason Garrett and letting Tom Brady have the ball back with two minutes to go.

Saints 20 - Buccaneers 26: Changing of the guard? Don't forget New Orleans only got in as a wild card last year.

Vikings 10 - Bears 39: Seriously. Why does anyone bother kicking to Devin Hester?

Dolphins 6 - Jets 24: Miami fans probably really want to run owner Steven Ross out of town for not getting Jim Harbaugh.

Week 7 Pick 'Em: Congrats to Gumbie for being the sole occupant of Perfection Island (Just 20 miles east of Revis Island) and for having the stones to pick the Niners in an upset. And for not thinking Carolina could have pulled off the upset. Here's how the numbers broke down:

My record: 4-1

Your records:

Gumbie: 5-0

Xeknos: 4-1
Minase: 4-1
*Legion*: 4-1
Sheep, er, boogle: 4-1
Nightmare: 4-1
Jayhawker: 4-1
Landshrk83: 4-1
Elliottx: 4-1
LeapingGnome: 4-1

MilkmanDanimal: 3-2
Kush15: 3-2
oldmanscene23: 3-2
Enix: 3-2
bighoppa: 3-2
garion333: 3-2
TheGameguru: 3-2

Atras: 2-3
iaintgotnopants: 2-3

And the season to date totals:

My record: 25-5

Your guys' record:

Minase: 25-5
Nightmare: 25-5

Gumbie: 24-6

garion333: 23-7

TheGameguru: 22-8
oldmanscene24: 22-8
MilkmanDanimal: 22-8
Kush15: 22-8
Xeknos: 22-8

boogle: 21-9
LeapingGnome: 21-9

Enix: 20-10
*Legion*: 20-10
Jayhawker: 20-10

iaintgotnopants: 19-11
bighoppa: 19-11
Landshrk83: 19-11

Elliottx: 17-13

Atras: 16-14

Can Gumbie do it? Can he go from last place after Week One to first with still about a half of a season to go? We'll see, but we won't be seeing Buffalo, Cincinnati, New England, New York Giants, Philadelphia, and San Francisco since they're all on byes. The match-ups for this week are:

Seahawks at Browns: See what I did there? Not every game can feature unbeaten teams versus one loss teams unless it's Week 2. Any, Seattle's had its ups and downs, but they did somehow manage to go into New York and beat the Giants. It wouldn't surprise me if they did the same to Cleveland. Seahawks.

Texans at Titans: Yes, hold your surprise that this game will decide the outcome of the AFC South. Houston's still short Andre Johnson and Mario Williams and for some unfathomable reason Matt Hasslebeck's playing his mind out. Oh yeah, and then there's this Chris Johnson fellow who might be turning the corner. However, Tennessee's defense isn't Baltimore's. Texans.

Broncos at Dolphins: Stifle your laughter. No, seriously, stop laughing. Yes I know this is Tim Tebow's first start of the season. Yes I know Miami's done something incredibly stupid by choosing to honor Tebow's Florida national championship team. But, I believe this is the best opportunity for both teams to get a win. Tebows...er...Broncos.

Bears at Buccaneers: Ah, the London Bowl, the most pointless away game on the NFL schedule the opportunity to grow the sport beyond the Western Hemisphere. Real question here is which teams are making the flight across the Atlantic, the good Bears/Bucs or the bad Bears/Bucs. And remember, Devin Hester, you run in the opposite lane when taking a punt or kickoff back for a touchdown. Hmmmmm, Bucs. God save the Raheem.

For my wild card, I'm focusing on Colts at Saints. Hey, I'm in the "lead;" I can afford to play conservative. Saints.

Enjoy the week folks.

And now, for no reason, this:

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

Forget a caption, someone put a sammich between their mouths. Or, ah, other things.

I'm pretty sure when Al Davis said, "Just win, baby," he didn't mean lose your starting quarterback in the process. And give up all your draft picks to get a replacement

Seriously.... They couldn't get Vince Young or Kyle Orton? Even I was a bit excited about that rumor.

I thought this sh!t was over...

GioClark wrote:
I'm pretty sure when Al Davis said, "Just win, baby," he didn't mean lose your starting quarterback in the process. And give up all your draft picks to get a replacement

Seriously.... They couldn't get Vince Young or Kyle Orton? Even I was a bit excited about that rumor.

I thought this sh!t was over...

Denver is looking to sell but not to a division rival....

I believe teams can put themselves in a position to not do well (tank). But shipping a division rival a serviceable QB so they can make a playoff run is a bit much to put over your fans.

edit: In the case of McNabb to Washington hindsight says that Philly knew exactly what they were selling the Skins.

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

"Galileo, Galileo! Galileo Figaro!"

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

"We will not let him go!"

"Let him go!"

"We will not let him go!"

"Let him go!"

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no!"

jowner wrote:

edit: In the case of McNabb to Washington hindsight says that Philly knew exactly what they were selling the Skins.

I hear you. Guess I read too much into the "Denver wants Tebow" hype. It would've been too poetic to ice pick the Broncos with their own QB.

Frankly though, this is nothing like the Curry deal, and I was a bit cross-eyed over that. Palmer is not a young project. He's an aging also-ran who has already threatened to retire.

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)
"Tongues?" "No tongues."

What?

Oh Raiders...

Stele wrote:

Oh Raiders...

Wow.

Raiders trade for Carson Palmer.

2012 First Round Pick
2013 Conditional First Round Pick (2nd rounder if he doesn't meet some criteria)

Great for the Bengals.

Seahawks at Browns: The Browns seem vaguely less terrible. I think. All I can say is when you're looking forward to getting Tarvaris Jackson back, you officially suck.

Texans at Titans: I thought the Titans would be one of the worst teams in the league with Kenny Britt. Of course, I'm an idiot, so never mind. No Mario, no AJ, in about 2 1/2 months, no Kubiak.

Broncos at Dolphins: Matt Moore is a better QB than Tim Tebow. I will never, ever, ever, ever in my life be able to better demonstrate what the phrase "backhanded compliment" means. Brandon Marshall should stay sane just long enough to torch his old team.

Bears "at" Buccaneers: Tampa wins when I pick them to lose, and loses when I pick them to win. Dammit. Anyways, I'd be amazed if Chicago's offensive line can play that well two weeks in a row, and Tampa's young d-line, while not racking up a lot of sacks, is causing lots of pressure. Also, Hester won't get many chances to return, as Koenen boots the hell out of the ball; it's basically all touchbacks on kickoffs.

Wildcard: Dammit, I usually choose Tampa's game as the wildcard. Uh . . . Atlanta at Detroit. Matt Ryan is a very good QB when he has time, and not very good when he doesn't. I'm going to put this game in the "doesn't" column.

Also, the games this coming weekend appear to pretty much suck. But hey, we have Saints-Colts on Sunday night to look forward to, and then Ravens-Jaguars Monday. Woo!

Seahawks at Browns

Texans at Titans

Broncos at Dolphins

Bears at Buccaneers

Wildcard: Normally in this spot I pick the Broncos game, but...

Chargers at Jets

Browns A Seahawks win here would be like lightning striking twice. TWO NFC West teams with decent records this late in the season would be an absolute miracle.

Titans They've looked great at home all year. Without Mario Williams Hasselbeck survives another game.

Dolphins This is mostly a vote of no confidence in His Holy Tebowness.

Bears I really have no idea who will win this one. Two mediocre road teams playing overseas... I've got Forte on my fantasy team so I'm pulling for the Bears.

Saints Brees and company take out their frustrations on the poor Colts.

It's officially Christian Ponder time in Minnesota.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

... Matt Moore is a better QB than Tim Tebow. ...

I don't remember Moore looking quite so sorry when he was with the Panthers, and last night he was ...

Oh, I see what you did there. ...

Seriously, though, I for the life of me don't understand what John Fox is doing in Denver. Foxy is as conservative as they come, and Tebow is ... not. The few times Carolina ran a wildcat play last time, Fox had a look on his face as if a little piece of him had died inside.

Then again, Denver might come out in a T formation on Sunday.

Rat Boy wrote:

Jaguars 13 - Steelers 17: Did Pittsburgh suddenly decide to call it a day after the first quarter?

The Jaguar defense is having a good season. They're 8th best in yards per play. Their overall rank is a bit lower than it should be (17th) due to the offense's struggles. Against the Steelers, they got torched early and then shut down the Steelers the rest of the game. Pittsburgh wasn't pushing too hard, of course, but they certainly were trying to move the ball as Jacksonville climbed back into the game, and even got the ball back for a potential game-winning drive.

Defense has been the one bright spot in Jacksonville, which has kept them in every game.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

It's officially Christian Ponder time in Minnesota.

Good. If you're not a winning team, it's the perfect time to let the rookie QB take his lumps.

OK, picks.

Seahawks at Browns
Texans at Titans. Oh man, did that hurt to bold.
Broncos at Dolphins. That one hurt almost as much!
Bears at Buccaneers

Going cheap to try and catch up: Packers over Vikings

So, is Ponder going in because

1. It's time to start building for the future.
2. His athleticism will help mask the failures of suddenly ancient Viking O-Line.
3. My good lord Donovan got bad fast.

Correct answer = YES

gizmo wrote:

So, is Ponder going in because

1. It's time to start building for the future.
2. His athleticism will help mask the failures of suddenly ancient Viking O-Line.
3. My good lord Donovan got bad fast.

Correct answer = YES

You forgot:

4. Vikings are pushing hard for a new stadium, and really need to generate some hype.

Nightmare wrote:

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

My O face brings the boys to the yard.
Damn right, its better than yours.
I can teach you.
But I'd have to charge.

I kinda feel bad for McNabb he was never accurate enough to be a great QB when he had the athleticism to make plays happen.. and the Eagles never gave him top notch talent to make up for his flaws.. outside of the one TO year when they had everything lined up for them until stinking Williams on the Cowboys ruined our SB.. burn in hell Dallas.. burn in hell.. I hope when judgement day comes your the first sob's lined up.

DIAF.

oh.. the PFT comments this was a classic

Is it true that McNabb’s response was:

“I look forward to going out there and starting this week and helping our team win….I am the starter. I have been to 5 NFC championship games…my mechanics are perfect….I will now go run the first team offense in practice…thanks.”

All that's missing is, "I don't need an armband".

Seahawks at Browns - This is with Clipboard Jesus starting.

Texans at Titans - Even without super Mario and A. Johnson the Texans are the better team.

Broncos at Dolphins - Tebow will be just awful, but the Dolphins are the worst team in the league so of course his first matchup has to be against them. Oh wow look how great Tebow is, "he just wins" against the worst team.

Bears at Buccaneers - Buccaneers are getting their sea legs, they'll be fine.

Wildcard: Rams at Cowboys - Easy win or hilarious loss.

Seahawks
Titans
Broncos
Bucs

Ravens over Jags

Seahawks
Titans
Broncos
Bucs

Packers over Vikings

Browns
Titans
Broncos
Bucs

Pack over Vikes.

Tough picks this week, I see all games we have to pick being decided by 4 points or less.

Seahawks at Browns: By a sliver, the Browns hold off the Seabags.

Texans at Titans: Titans homefield advantage is good enough. CJ continues to improve.

Broncos at Dolphins: Another really close game, but home cooking proves to be the deciding factor. Well, and a Tebow pick late in the game to ice it, allowing the Fins to notch a win finally.

Bears at Buccaneers: Totally a pick'em game, I can't see either team having an advantage over the other. No homefield to decide it. Bucs win it I guess.

Wildcard - Colts at Saints. Another call 911 game, not even close. Similar to the Packers-Rams game last week, where the Pack should have won by 50 and could easily have. I don't think the Saints can win by 50 but they can easily win by 20. Also, Peyton Manning should win MVP this year, he seems like he's worth 10-11 wins all by himself.

IMAGE(http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/8577/coachespd.jpg)

Shampoo is better; I go on first and clean the hair!
Conditioner is better; I leave the hair silky and smooth!

TheGameguru wrote:

outside of the one TO year when they had everything lined up for them until stinking Williams on the Cowboys ruined our SB.. burn in hell Dallas.. burn in hell.. I hope when judgement day comes your the first sob's lined up.

Funny, since the Eagles never missed a beat after Williams injured TO. Owens played in the Super Bowl and I believe had 7 catches (Sorry, he had 9 catches for 122 yds). So how exactly did Williams ruin "the Eagles" Super Bowl?

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