Employee Profile: Baggachipz

I had lots of nice things I was prepared to say about Baggachipz, a forum member who has been with us since the very beggining and helped shape the collective personality of GWJ, but then he sent in this picture of himself and it washes away two-and-a-half years of good things. I mean, imagine if he's wearing the coconut bikini when playing Battlefield 2; the guy who just happily ran you over, may be wearing a grass skirt!

IMAGE(http://www.gamerswithjobs.com/files/images/Baggadisturbing.thumbnail.jpg)

Read on to find out exactly what the hell is wrong with Baggachipz.

1)Who the devil are you?

My name is Matt, and I'm a disturbingly average white male, 29 years ripe. We just moved to Charlotte, NC to build our dream house.

2) What are you supposed to be doing during the day when you're reading GWJ?

My job title usually includes "Web Developer," but I've come to terms with the fact that I'm professional job switcher. Do what you're good at, they say. Currently I'm trying to start my own business but the harsh mistress of capitalism will most likely require full-time employment in the near future.

3) How about family? Kids? Pets? Particularly meaningful inanimate objects?

I have a lovely wife and a four-legged canine kid, whose name is Denver. Denver is no doubt a "gateway dependent" which will most likely result in human additions to our family.

I'm particularly fond of a small bull's head statue which my parents brought me from Greece years ago. I don't know why they got it for me or what its purpose is. This small bull head is downright scary, and it doesn't match with anything; which, I've learned annoys my wife and ruins her decor motif. As a result, I'm that much more compelled to have it on display in a prominent space in the house. It's fun to see whether guests in our home will ask about it.

4) What was your favorite game over the last year or so? Why?

I sure wish I could list some off-the-wall hidden gem of a game, and look like a seasoned gaming connoisseur. But, my GOTY is Half-Life 2, for every reason everyone else has already listed. It's the only game in a long time that when I finished it, I wanted more in a good way. Like I stated above I'm disturbingly average. Honorable mention goes to Battlefield 2, whose excellent gameplay and teabagging opportunities have brought me much joy and agony.

5) Which game are you looking forward to most?

I'm going to cheat a bit and say that more than any one game, I'm really looking forward to the experience that the Xbox 360 will potentially provide. Yes, I'm filling out this profile right before it launches, amid peak hype, and when this gets posted months from now I may end up looking like a total clown. Moreso than usual.

6) What is your fondest gaming memory?

Until college, games had been more of an obsessive playtime activity that I always figured I'd outgrow. That is, until one night when my freshman-year roommate fired up QBasic Gorillas and we started playing. Then, the idea of mixing the penalty of alcohol consumption was introduced and games competition took on another dimension. What a wonderous new world was opened to me! Competition got fierce, and eventually we were good enough that we would hit the opposing gorilla on every attempt. The unlikely marriage of geeky video entertainment and binge drinking produced a glorious offspring that continues to live with me to this day.

7) Can you hear me now? Good, what's in your wallet?

If you're that Verizon Wireless guy, I'd like to fight you. What kind of world is this when the Dell Dude gets phased out but the Verizon guy is still around? My wallet contains a Costanza-esque collection of receipts and occasionally money. I also have four two-dollar bills stashed in there for no apparent reason.

8) Finally, why do you play games at all? Why haven't you outgrown them?

Games are another form of entertainment, and in my case my favorite form. Their interactive nature makes them superior to passive (and often mind-numbing) forms such as TV. I also love the social aspect of online multiplayer games, even if my wife thinks I look rediculous in a headset. Don't get me wrong, I watch plenty of TV, but I'd rather be playing games. Usually. Those who feel that games are just a child's toy clearly haven't played any games in a long time, and that's their loss. Plus they know I'd pwn them omfglol.

9) Thanks for taking the time to answer our hard hitting questions! Any last words?

My life has seen its share of accomplishments, from Making the game-winning kick in the World Kickball Championship in 2000 to winning a pie-eating contest at summer camp. Those notable accomplishments pale in comparison to getting a front-page spot on this majestic site. Anyone wanna play some QBasic Gorillas?

--

Thanks, Bagga. While I don't encourage your grass skirt wearing, it occurs to me that wearing something while grilling on your porch is better than wearing nothing.

Comments

Horrifying...image...burned...into...retinas...

I thiiiink I spot a nipple!!! Wait, no, that's just the chunks I blew on my monitor.

Seriously, good to meetcha...I'll be the grass skirt makes it easy to squat when one is teabagging.

My Eyes, My Eyes, man nipple. garrggllll...

KHAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!

Leave it to our evil overlord to bring back the most requested feature in the most disturbing way possible. "You want employee profiles, huh? TAKE THAT!"

I salute you sir.

With pictures like that, why come to GWJ to read articles?

GWJ softcore!

Fap-fap-fap-fap...

That's just what we *say* we're here for. Really, those donations fund the bizarro porn collection that is known as GWJ.

I feel we should have a section devoted to "Dear Goodge..."

Pleasure to make your acquaintance Bagga.

And hooray! Employee Profiles are back!

dhaelis wrote:

With pictures like that, why come to GWJ to read articles?

I'll be in my bunk..

Maybe we should be calling you Nip.. (Seinfeld reference)

In my opinion, we need MORE pictures of forum members, half naked with their meat in hand.

IMAGE(http://img117.exs.cx/img117/5601/n1qshok.gif)

Weiner bomb indeed.

belt wrote:

In my opinion, we need MORE pictures of forum members, half naked with their meat in hand.

There are so many things wrong with that statement, I just don't know where to start.

BAGGA- NIPS?? as George Takei would say, " OH MY!"

How deliciously absurd!!!!

Jarhead22 wrote:

as George Takei would say, " OH MY!"

George Takei would totally masturbate to that pic.

Oooohh, You can come to Jersey to cook my meat anyday baggachipz. Ha Ha, Bicurious! Just kidding. Now go get that Verizon guy and break all his fingers so he can never make the V sign again.

Hans! He is poifect! The new face of Winterbottem! =D

Also: Nipples

Boobies!

Best. Profile Picture. EVAR.

KHAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!

You just made my day.

belt wrote:

In my opinion, we need MORE pictures of forum members, half naked with their meat in hand.

Why only half?

BTW: Who made up these "Hard Hitting" questions? I have seen harsher interviews from the kids section in the Sunday paper. You know the part when they interview some 2nd tier teen celebrity. You know you read it....

Huzzah on bringing back the employee profiles. A pox on thee for man boobs though.

For you people that holler that the site needs more boobies, thanks. Thanks alot.

An employee profile that also doubles as a 'Welcome perverts'. Well done, sirs.

Get your own damn chopper, freak.

Can I have a sausage with peppers and nipples?

Onions, I meant onions!