Swaydora's Box - My Terrifying Find in the Attic

"Sway" wrote:

Besides, if you moved out here, you could open the box for me.

sh*t, I only live 2 1/2 hours away...sounds like a road trip! Drive for a while, open a box, be consumed by some horrendous evil...What could be more fun?

mind you if you ever want a REALLY scary place to stay...with loads of stuffed animals and a scary huge almost gothic mansion to explore!

Kegboy''s big mansion of stuffed animals, while interesting, doesn''t sound scary so much as cuddly. Anyone else picturing teddy bears, etc.?

And Sway - I couldn''t possibly stand the suspense. I''d HAVE to open the box to see what''s in it. Aren''t you bursting with curiosity?

"Elysia" wrote:

And Sway - I couldn''t possibly stand the suspense. I''d HAVE to open the box to see what''s in it. Aren''t you bursting with curiosity?

Yup. Just like the box is bursting with undead. I draw your attention away from the box toward the area underneath it. It looks to me like some sort of deep chasm, or perhaps a pit of hell. I can''t imagine what horrors lie down there, and I''d clearly have to negotiate it were I to approach that box.

So far I like Drunkagain''s suggestion the best. What if, instead of containing the hooch-preserved remains of the Hobo King, as Pyro has suggested...or the gold boullion per Certis'' theory, it is, instead, brimming with old phonebooks? I''d have gone and sullied a perfectly good mystery.

Although, it appears the box is destined to be opened. A girlfriend of a coworker has indicated she may be willing to open it. We''ll see if she changes her mind once she steps on the other side of the portal in my ceiling. It''s amazing how that hot attic can have such a chilling effect on the soul.

At first I was like, COME ON, OPEN IT.

But after some thought, I guess it would ruin it all if you did.

Imagine the dissapointment if you went through having it open only to find a bunch of old toilet paper rolls? Or worse yet, nothing at all.

What a bummer that would be.

But of course, they could be CURSED ROLLS OF TOILET PAPER!!!

Elysium and I have been watching the DVDs of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel as part of our summer entertainment. (It''s too hot to go outside to do stuff when you''re extremely pregnant - we need indoor fun!) My imagination has been hugely influenced by Joss Whedon, and I have all sorts of vivid ideas about what''s in the box. If we lived there (and I could fit through the attic door!) I''d climb up and take a look. Please indulge those of us who''re dying to know!

(It''s too hot to go outside to do stuff when you''re extremely pregnant - we need indoor fun!)

I''m betting that''s how you ended up pregnant in the first place!

*cue goofy 70''s soundtrack*

Gotta love that indoor fun!

"Ridlin1.5" wrote:

But of course, they could be CURSED ROLLS OF TOILET PAPER!!!

One man, looking for a bathroom
All that hot sauce seemed like a good idea
Now he desperately searches for a toilet

but instead he finds ...

[size=14][color=#880000:eb3797dad1]TOILET PAPER OF THE DAMNED[/color][/size]

Be amazed as his ass is forever chapped!
Shriek in pain as his cheeks suffer toilet paper cuts of doom!
His ass will burn forever more!

If you value your ass you don''t want to miss this!

This could be an awesome movie.

um...

This is worse than trying to figure out what was in the briefcase in Pulp Fiction.

I don''t live too far away... You need an opener? I wish I read this site over the weekend, I just flew into BWI last night. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by opening it. Of course, what could possibly exist of any value in Bal''mer, MD?

Hmm, Maryland *is* evil; it''s Virginia''s Canada, you know. But still. Do it! Do it!

sooooo....any progress on finding your cajhonies and getting up there and opening it?

I will not accept a ''saving the mystery'' excuse here...

sooooo....any progress on finding your cajhonies and getting up there and opening it?

Maybe in the ultimate Catch-22, his cojones areinthe box, thus rendering it impossible for him to ever open it and reclaim them...

I still say get a grad student. Like they have any will left.

This thread shall not die until it is resolved with photo evidence!

Stickyfied!

"fangblackbone" wrote:

So do we lose our hardcore gamer badge if we admit to enjoying watching Antique Roadshow?

This is purely a hypothetical question of course. *ehem*

I''m going to go with ""yes"", and you might have to leave some other bits at the door.

Sway, just pay some kid $5 to open the box... just make sure no body sees you do it, just in case...

This reminds me of when Geraldo Reveria (sp) had that prime-time special about Al Capone''s vault. All the hoopla and the damn thing was empty......

Still, if the very presence of that thing sends chills down Sway''s spine every so often, then thats worth the price of admission.

geeeeez.... this is still ongoing? Suck it up man!

Where you live? I''m sure I can make it to wherever you are and back over a weekend on my bike.

My wife just asked me,
""You talking with your group again?""

""Yep""

""That guy finally open that box?""

""Nope.""

""Really? what''s his problem?""

""Don''t know, honey, but I''m typing this to him now. Maybe he''ll see it and get the job done.""

???

Sway, I''m holding you personally responsible for any hell you unleash when you open that box. You better think twice before you do it.

Maybe he already did. We haven''t heard from him in a while.

Come on, Sway: look at how many views this thread has generated compared to anything else in the ""Everything Else"" forum!

Open the box! Open the box!

...but if it''s a portal to the Underworld, make sure to shut it back up again reeeeaaaallllly quickly.

It will be opened. That''s all I can say right now.

Lining up the PPV, are we?

Just for the love of god get a real ladder. All we need is a post where we find out there was just dust in the box, but Sway broke his arm in a fall from using coffee tables to climb up to the attic...

Honestly, in all reality what is the worst that could be in there?

Um...I am just guessing here, but if there was a dead body or body parts in the box, wouldn''t they stink to high heaven by now?

So if you can safely rule out that, then all that is left is just someones stuff.

Dude, just open the box already. If I was anywhere near you, up to 4 hours drive, I would come over and do it for you.

Oh, and get a propper ladder before you do it, that chair/table combo has deathtrap written all over it.

Sway wrote:
It will be opened. That''s all I can say right now.

Is it just me, or did this statement sound ominous to anyone else?