Bikinis, Cheerleaders & Zombies: Catch-All (now with more penicillin)

Filed under: so stupid and ridiculous, it has to be good.

The makers of Earth Defense Force 2017 are bringing another ridiculous game to the states on two systems: Onechanbara- Bikini Samurai Squad (360), and Onechanbara- Bikini Zombie Slayers. These are from the series that was a PS2 budget line, and strictly a Japanese thing. On the 360, Oneechanbara VorteX- The Descendants of The Cursed Blood was released in Japan 2 years ago. For better or worse, these games involve: zombies, chicks in bikinis, and sword play. Apparently, the girls where bikinis because the blood gets on their skin and they get power?

IGN says about the 360 version:

Onechanbara loosely translates to "sisters in blood" and the theme is felt strongly in the game mechanics. Blood flies everywhere as you slash your way through the zombies and some of it will start building up on the girls and their weapons. Build up enough blood on a sword and you'll find that it gets stuck in the enemies rather than slicing right through. If enough blood gets on one of the girls, she'll go into a rage mode where the damage dealt is multiplied but a health drain is in effect.

..
Ok, um, sounds like "What excuse can we use to have 'hot chics' covered in blood, walking around half-naked?" It sounds like something out of a Troma movie, but there is too much thought put into it to be a Troma product. The crazy thing, it sounds so silly and ridiculous, like it just might work. The reviews of course will fall between 6 and 7, except for Maxim, which would probably give it 8 or 9 because of "hot chics and zombies". They also mention there's some sort of story. Yeah, I'm sure there is!

The marketing is also pretty bizarre, but totally tongue in cheek, maybe tongue through cheek. These videos are where the "hot chics"- more like "cute Asian girls"- come in to play:

Pizza Delivery movie.
Birthday Party movie.
Wed and Dead movie.
Rest in Peace movie.
Music Video, mildly NSFW, ok maybe you shouldn't watch this one at work!

But we'll see, and it releases on my birthday, 2-9. Nice present! I think?

I'm interested to see how these are. They look like good stupid fun and were at least good enough to spawn sequels, but I've heard they're "budget titties." I mean titles.

MaxShrek wrote:

Music Video, mildly NSFW.

Mildly? How would you explain that one to anyone who walks by?

"it was the one armed man!"
Corrected for safety.

Its hard to tell if the gameplay looks fun at all, but the humor seems to be in the right place so I'd give it a shot.

polypusher wrote:

Its hard to tell if the gameplay looks fun at all, but the humor seems to be in the right place so I'd give it a shot.

I read that there's a button for cleaning your sword (I'd imagine it's more of a Ninja Gaiden-style whip than a sexually suggestive rubbing) and if it gets too dirty it can get stuck in zombies. That's kind of a cool mechanic.

Is Bikini Zombie Slayers a Wii exclusive, or is it coming to other systems as well?

LobsterMobster wrote:
polypusher wrote:

Its hard to tell if the gameplay looks fun at all, but the humor seems to be in the right place so I'd give it a shot.

I read that there's a button for cleaning your sword (I'd imagine it's more of a Ninja Gaiden-style whip than a sexually suggestive rubbing) and if it gets too dirty it can get stuck in zombies. That's kind of a cool mechanic.

You my friend, have way, way, way too much faith in the way the Japanese mind works.

adam.greenbrier wrote:

Is Bikini Zombie Slayers a Wii exclusive, or is it coming to other systems as well?

There's one for the Wii and one for the X360. I do not believe they are exactly the same game.

I [u]loved[/u] EDF, and can't wait for this game! What's better than blasting away waves of giant bugs and robots? Anime girls in bikinis hacking through waves of zombies, that's what!

There is a movie. Which I have seen, and which was ridiculously entertaining (in a B-Movie way).

Old Man P π wrote:

There is a movie. Which I have seen, and which was ridiculously entertaining (in a B-Movie way).

How does it compare to Machine Girl?

Depends on whether you prefer your gore covered girls to be wearing bikinis and cowboy hats, or school girl outfits...

Machine Girl was better. For what it's worth, if you enjoyed Machine Girl, check out Tokyo Gore Police.

LobsterMobster wrote:
adam.greenbrier wrote:

Is Bikini Zombie Slayers a Wii exclusive, or is it coming to other systems as well?

There's one for the Wii and one for the X360. I do not believe they are exactly the same game.

I understand that one is a "sequel" to the other, inasmuch as the logical progression of a story matters.

beeporama wrote:
LobsterMobster wrote:
adam.greenbrier wrote:

Is Bikini Zombie Slayers a Wii exclusive, or is it coming to other systems as well?

There's one for the Wii and one for the X360. I do not believe they are exactly the same game.

I understand that one is a "sequel" to the other, inasmuch as the logical progression of a story matters.

There's a story? And logic?

It doesn't look like there will be much to the gameplay, like Dynasty Warriors or Ninety Nine Nights. Could offend somebody. "There's a story, but it doesn't matter."

I like Dynasty Warriors.

In support of quirky Japanese 360 games being ported over to the US, I will be buying this one.

I played the heck out of EDF2017 and Bullet Witch, so hopefully this'll be good fun.

Oh D3 and Sandlot, please release another 360 EDF title.

The hardest levels in EDF2017 are insane when it comes to getting stuck in a mess of enemies, and not knowing what the hell is going on. Still awesome fun! "Do not attack the spaceships, we don't think they have anything to do with the giant bugs currently attacking!" Ok, shoots that theory!

To revive the thread, since the games release tomorrow: it's heartening to see the low MSRP's of $40/$30 compared to the usual $60/$40. It's a niche that isn't often filled, at least in the U.S.; it seems like action games either attempt to be AAA titles or shovelware. A mature action game debuting at this price point is interesting, and (in this recession) I wonder if it might pressure other publishers to slip back to $50 for new games.

(Now I suppose the game might still be shovelware, but based on previews might be roughly comparable to say Afro Samurai minus the license and voice acting, so if it's simply good and not great it's justifiable in my book.)

It's the next logical step after DOA: Extreme Beach Volleyball. We'll probably see some bikinis in space game next, followed by Super S.W.A.T. Bikini Bomb Squad, some bikini puzzler - likely to be set in a grocery store with the bikini girls as baggers, a version of word whomp where you have to grab boobs to spell words and then they will finally drop all pretext and make "Intercourse: The First Person Shooter"

caustic77 wrote:

It's the next logical step after DOA: Extreme Beach Volleyball. We'll probably see some bikinis in space game next, followed by Super S.W.A.T. Bikini Bomb Squad, some bikini puzzler - likely to be set in a grocery store with the bikini girls as baggers, a version of word whomp where you have to grab boobs to spell words and then they will finally drop all pretext and make "Intercourse: The First Person Shooter"

I'm okay with the bikini games as long as they're as much fun as DOA: Extreme Beach Vollyball; my wife and I had a lot of fun playing that one.

caustic77 wrote:

It's the next logical step after DOA: Extreme Beach Volleyball. We'll probably see some bikinis in space game next, followed by Super S.W.A.T. Bikini Bomb Squad, some bikini puzzler - likely to be set in a grocery store with the bikini girls as baggers, a version of word whomp where you have to grab boobs to spell words and then they will finally drop all pretext and make "Intercourse: The First Person Shooter"

You obviously missed the critically Acclaimed (see what I did there viewers?) classic that was BMX XXX. At least the Onechanbara game has some basis for existence with the Japanese anime its based upon; as opposed to the BMX blatant stupidity.

ShynDarkly wrote:
caustic77 wrote:

It's the next logical step after DOA: Extreme Beach Volleyball. We'll probably see some bikinis in space game next, followed by Super S.W.A.T. Bikini Bomb Squad, some bikini puzzler - likely to be set in a grocery store with the bikini girls as baggers, a version of word whomp where you have to grab boobs to spell words and then they will finally drop all pretext and make "Intercourse: The First Person Shooter"

You obviously missed the critically Acclaimed (see what I did there viewers?) classic that was BMX XXX. At least the Onechanbara game has some basis for existence with the Japanese anime its based upon; as opposed to the BMX blatant stupidity.

Yes, but it does not fall under the same category because you can have male and less than slutty girl characters. If it was nothing but bikini girls or had Japanese dating sim aspects it would fit. Otherwise BMX XXX falls under the category of sh*tastic quasi-porn for Generation Hawk.

caustic77 wrote:

Yes, but it does not fall under the same category because you can have male and less than slutty girl characters. If it was nothing but bikini girls or had Japanese dating sim aspects it would fit. Otherwise BMX XXX falls under the category of sh*tastic quasi-porn for Generation Hawk.

Look umm... not to be "that guy," but... Is there something wrong with some games being trashy? At the very least we get to make fun of them.

LobsterMobster wrote:
caustic77 wrote:

Yes, but it does not fall under the same category because you can have male and less than slutty girl characters. If it was nothing but bikini girls or had Japanese dating sim aspects it would fit. Otherwise BMX XXX falls under the category of sh*tastic quasi-porn for Generation Hawk.

Look umm... not to be "that guy," but... Is there something wrong with some games being trashy? At the very least we get to make fun of them.

There is nothing wrong with trashy games at all. sh*t, I own a copy of BMX XXX (mostly because it is an insult to try to sell it back to Gamestop for a nickel). My problem is trashy games that try to act like they are something else. I say, own your lewdness and bask in its glory.

Well, I guess my other problem is that most trashy games are horrible to play. Why can't we have a fun game with copious amounts of gratuitous filth?

I don't think samurai bikini cowgirls killing zombies is trying to be anything particularly high brow. I would posit that BMX XXX and DoA Volleyball are not bad games because they're all about sex, they're bad games because they're bad games. It's not like designers are allocating skill points here. They don't go, "we had to lower our wisdom and intelligence in order to maximize charisma. Call it min-maxing!" If you want to get analytical I'd imagine studios don't put their best developers on projects like this because they have a limited market (moms and grandparents will not be buying this game for little Johnny's birthday). I'm sure the developers try to make the game as good as they can. I'll point out that there are an awful lot of terrible games - worse even than DoA Volleyball - that DON'T have boobies.

Yes, but a lot of bad games use the boobs to cover up the stink. Look at the Outlaw Golf/Volleyball series. Sure they were not trying to be highbrow, but they weren't trying to be good. Without the boobs (DOA volleyball is guilty of it also) it would have just been a crappy sports title. BMX XXX is the same, but I almost see it as unintentional genius in lampooning the horrible Tony Hawk games (Yeah I said it, those games sucked).

Samauri Bikini Squad seems like it will have enough camp value to make it worthwhile. If not, it's just another bad game that hopes the distraction of boobies will push sales a little.

I really don't think there's ever a point in a game's development when someone goes, "this game sucks, we'd better put boobs in it instead of trying to fix it."

I think this game is based on a manga that already existed in Japan? Rather than tacking on the oogaba, I thought the characters attire is part of the backstory? (meaning, it was tacked on way back when the original ip was created... )

It doesnt matter though. I think this will be fun. D3 has a pretty good track record of publishing enjoyable (more) budget priced B-movie games. Only a handful of their titles make it from Japan to the States, which is too bad.

caustic77 wrote:

Yes, but a lot of bad games use the boobs to cover up the stink. Look at the Outlaw Golf/Volleyball series. Sure they were not trying to be highbrow, but they weren't trying to be good. Without the boobs (DOA volleyball is guilty of it also) it would have just been a crappy sports title.

To each their own. I thought Outlaw Golf was just as much fun as Hot Shots Golf-- I had a great time with both. I have to admit, Outlaw Volleyball wasn't very good, which just puts it on a very large pile of poor sports titles.