Biscuits, gravy, and the state of the world

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So, every morning for the 60 years they were married, my grandmother made my granddad biscuits, eggs, and side meat for breakfast. This morning, as I was shoehorning Molly into her carseat, my wife sticks a 7 oz bottle of Dannon Light 'n Fit Smoothie into my coat pocket.

That seem right to you?

Jeb wrote:

So, every morning for the 60 years they were married, my grandmother made my granddad biscuits, eggs, and side meat for breakfast. This morning, as I was shoehorning Molly into her carseat, my wife sticks a 7 oz bottle of Dannon Light 'n Fit Smoothie into my coat pocket.

That seem right to you?

No. No, it does not. As a northerner who married a southerner, I have to say biscuits and gravy are one damned strong argument for lving in the south. I mean you got your sausage, your biscuits, your buttery white gravy...what is not to love?! Throw some sausage in that smoothie and you're good to go. Wow that sounded dirty.

Well you guys have children. Also, can you make it on your paycheck alone? My wife would make me breakfast every morning if she didn't have to go to work herself.

Would I want to eat it? After she got better at it.

"white gravy"

White gravy? That's.... That doesn't sound right.

Biscuts and sausage gravy are simply divine, no matter which way you look at it. However, if it's yogurt you have to eat, grab some of the Stony Field singles or Horizon instead of Dannon. Taste much much better.

Jeb wrote:

So, every morning for the 60 years they were married, my grandmother made my granddad biscuits, eggs, and side meat for breakfast. This morning, as I was shoehorning Molly into her carseat, my wife sticks a 7 oz bottle of Dannon Light 'n Fit Smoothie into my coat pocket.

That seem right to you?

No, if only because that's not nearly enough calories to get you through the morning. If all you have is a smoothie, which I assume is in the range of 200 calories, you'll be starving by 10 o'clock. Tell her to give you some fruit and toast in the other pocket.

I think grits are much better than biscuits and gravy, if only because the sausage gravy is usually made with pork sausage. But grits... oh how I love me some grits. Gross name, divine dish.

1Dgaf wrote:

"white gravy"

White gravy? That's.... That doesn't sound right.

It's just flour, butter (or lard), and milk...you sicko.

1Dgaf wrote:

"white gravy"

White gravy? That's.... That doesn't sound right.

Have no fear, 1Dgaf. It's delicious and simple. The white color comes from milk, which is used in place of stock or drippings, since sausage tends to have a sronger flavor than, say, a roast chicken. Here's a recipe from the Food Network, which I've edited just a tad:

12 ounces pork sausage
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 cups milk
Freshly ground black pepper, to taste
(Note that sausage gravy is always served with biscuits. The word "biscuit" in the US basically refers to a savory scone. The original Food Network recipe is followed by a suitable recipe for biscuits.)

Heat a large cast-iron skillet over medium-high heat. Add the sausage, break it up with a wooden spoon, and cook, stirring occasionally, until well browned and cooked through, about 7 minutes. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the sausage to a bowl, leaving the rendered fat in the skillet. Whisk the flour into the fat and cook, stirring, for about 1 minute. While whisking, pour the milk into the skillet and bring the gravy to a boil. Lower the heat and simmer gently for 2 minutes. Stir in the sausage and season with pepper. Split some biscuits in half and divide them among plates. Top each biscuit with some of the gravy and serve immediately.

Note, too, folks, that sausage gravy can be yours in the mornings if you leave yourself a mere fifteen minutes' time to cook, which is probably only about ten minutes more than even the most hasty breakfast-eaters spend preparing their morning meal. No need for a spouse to cook it! As for biscuits, make those on the weekend and freeze them. When you start the sausage gravy, take one out, split it open, and toast it back to life. You'll have enough gravy to save it in the refrigerator, so the next few mornings will require even less work. The gravy will thicken when cold, so just thin it out with a little bit of water to reheat.

Buttermilk biscuits are, in my opinion, the only real way to go with sausage gravy. Baking power biscuits (and dumplings too) are very good as well, don't get me wrong, but the buttermilk adds a bit of a kick which I really enjoy with the gravy. Personal preference, of course.

Don't tell me Jeb, you drive a minivan?

My wife would make me breakfast every morning if she didn't have to go to work herself.

So, if she works too then she should make breakfast for two people!

LeapingGnome wrote:

Don't tell me Jeb, you drive a minivan?

Actually, no, you filthy presuming presumer.

IMAGE(http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e348/jebramage/IMG_1.jpg)

Stock photo, neither child nor babe in back seat are actually mine... though it's probably close enough for gov'ment work.

So, if she works too then she should make breakfast for two people!

EXACTLY!

Wait, how come you can't make your own biscuits and gravy? As Lobo said, it's not like it takes forever.

KaterinLHC wrote:

I think grits are much better than biscuits and gravy, if only because the sausage gravy is usually made with pork sausage. But grits... oh how I love me some grits. Gross name, divine dish.

The only real purpose of grits is to have something to eat along with the butter you slather over it all.

Oh, and regarding the breakfast-making stuff -- get over it. Or, why don't *you* make biscuits, gravy, eggs, etc. for all?

But darn it Kat, it tastes better when somebody else cooks for you.

oh sausage gravy how I miss thee. Why does Bob Evens not come down to the south?

Jeb wrote:

But darn it Kat, it tastes better when somebody else cooks for you.

Then just think how delicious your wife will find it. Don't you want her to have delicious food to eat? Don't you love her, Jeb?

Jeb wrote:

But darn it Kat, it tastes better when somebody else cooks for you. :)

Why yes, yes it does. So you should totally make her biscuits and gravy. Or better yet, screw that and just make me grits. Everyone in this world would be happier if they were making me grits.

croaker wrote:

The only real purpose of grits is to have something to eat along with the butter you slather over it all.

Butter goes IN grits, not on it. How else is all that scrumptious cheese going to get mixed in?

Anyone else thinking we're rapidly approaching another book page for the GWJ Recipe wiki?

Oh, Katerin. Why must we both be married? We should run off to Mexico together and drink margaritas and finish one another's sentences and completely fail to drive our car into the Grand Canyon, thus proving that women don't have to die spectacularly to assert their independence.

You're all f*cking nuts.

Amen.

1Dgaf wrote:

You're all f*cking nuts.

Amen.

Sure thing Mr. Bangers'n'Mash.

Brennil wrote:

Oh, Katerin. Why must we both be married? We should run off to Mexico together and drink margaritas and finish one another's sentences and completely fail to drive our car into the Grand Canyon, thus proving that women don't have to die spectacularly to assert their independence.

This is completely going in a direction I enjoy very much. Newsletter, stat!

1Dgaf wrote:

You're all f*cking nuts.

Amen.

Englishmen should restrain themselves from critizing cuisine.

Jeb, sadly biscuit making is an art that is quickly leaving many of our southern women (and one my Yankee wife, never had ) so you should do what I do, eat cereal and toast/bagel during the week and then head downtown to Over Easy on the weekend, where you can find some great biscuts and gravy, as well as some mouthwatering sausage.

Brennil wrote:
Jeb wrote:

But darn it Kat, it tastes better when somebody else cooks for you.

Then just think how delicious your wife will find it. Don't you want her to have delicious food to eat? Don't you love her, Jeb?

Madly. Passionately. Tragically. And even more so after I gulp down that first cup of coffee.

KaterinLHC wrote:

So you should totally make her biscuits and gravy. Or better yet, screw that and just make me grits. Everyone in this world would be happier if they were making me grits.

croaker wrote:

Oh, and regarding the breakfast-making stuff -- get over it. Or, why don't *you* make biscuits, gravy, eggs, etc. for all?

So, if I'm reading you guys right, you're saying that I should make her biscuits and gravy?

Actually, the purpose of my original post was certainly NOT meant to complain about my wife. She's incredible, and smarter than me, and works a TON harder than I do. Plus, she's hot and foxy. Plus, she loves Firefly as much as I do. (ENVY ME.) No, the point I was trying to make (as is evidenced by the actual title of the thread) was that in the name of progress we've lost a little something along the way... who has time for a real breakfast on a workday anymore?

I did make a snide 'exactly' in agreement with Leap with a smiley beside it, meant in fun. If I know Leap, then I'm willing to bet that he was joking, too, smiley or not.

Brennil wrote:

Oh, Katerin. Why must we both be married? We should run off to Mexico together and drink margaritas and finish one another's sentences and completely fail to drive our car into the Grand Canyon, thus proving that women don't have to die spectacularly to assert their independence.

I'll be in my bunk.

Brennil wrote:

Oh, Katerin. Why must we both be married? We should run off to Mexico together and drink margaritas and finish one another's sentences and completely fail to drive our car into the Grand Canyon, thus proving that women don't have to die spectacularly to assert their independence.

Hey, I'm not married yet. I could totally be your other woman, guilt-free. After all, I love margaritas. And not crashing cars.

(Also, sigged!)

KaterinLHC wrote:
Brennil wrote:

Oh, Katerin. Why must we both be married? We should run off to Mexico together and drink margaritas and finish one another's sentences and completely fail to drive our car into the Grand Canyon, thus proving that women don't have to die spectacularly to assert their independence.

Hey, I'm not married yet. I could totally be your other woman, guilt-free. After all, I love margaritas. And not crashing cars.

What's better than male-on-male homoerotic banter? Well, almost anything. But especially this. Though this is probably merely a ploy for you both to get your Brad Pitt on.

"Englishmen should restrain themselves from critizing cuisine."

And I surely will - when cuisine is being talked about.

Breakfast in the morning is problematic, I agree.

Jeb, how long do you have between when you get up and when you leave? I often make oatmeal, which takes about 25 minutes from start to finish, and requires no effort after it's started.

Melt some butter, toss in some rolled oats. Let them toast for a few minutes, then toss in some dried fruit. Pour boiling water over it, and let it sit for 25 minutes or so. Perfect amount of time to shower, make coffee, get dressed, etc. After that, pour some good whole milk, cinnamon, and brown sugar over it, mix it up, and eat it! Or bring it into work in a tupperware.

Make mine a bagel sandwhich and a fresh piece of fruit in the morning, please. (Of course, I generally just have an extra 20 minutes of sleep for breakfast myself.)

As for the greatest southern food of all time, you are all wrong: fried okra is the best thing they've come up with down there, no ifs, ands, or buts about it.

Badferret wrote:

... then head downtown to Over Easy on the weekend, where you can find some great biscuts and gravy, as well as some mouthwatering sausage.

Mmmm.... Over Easy.

DrunkenSleipnir wrote:

Melt some butter, toss in some rolled oats. Let them toast for a few minutes, then toss in some dried fruit. Pour boiling water over it, and let it sit for 25 minutes or so. Perfect amount of time to shower, make coffee, get dressed, etc. After that, pour some good whole milk, cinnamon, and brown sugar over it, mix it up, and eat it! Or bring it into work in a tupperware.

I'll be over tomorrow morning. 7:30, say?

Actually, as the official representative of Pillsbury, it's my duty to inform you that you should all have cinnamon buns, every single morning.

IMAGE(http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y48/Poppinfresh2k5/cake.jpg)

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