NFL 2020: Week 8

It's fall, y'all. Leaves are falling from the trees. Temperatures are falling into chilly territory. And the NFL ... you see where I'm going with this?

Let's do this!

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Let's gooooooooo!

Are you having a nice fall, Daniel Jones? I think maybe it's time for a trip!

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Hahaha. That one will never get old.

This guy? I think he falls down on purpose

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The Chiefs are good! It was a little early in the season for a snow game, but I'll take it.

In Atlanta, meanwhile, fall comes late:

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It's the Atlanta FaLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLcons, ladies and gentlemen! Falling short while trying to fall short.

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If I'm trick-or-treating in DK Metcalf's neighborhood, I do not want to be the guy who smashes his pumpkin:

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Dude hit 22.64 mph on that run. I mean, Russell Wilson ain't slow, and Metcalf goes whoooooooosh.
But to stick with the metaphor, stock in the Seahawks D is falling. They're not good! Also, DK Metcalf should play linebacker.

Hey Cam! What did you think of your performance this week?

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Yep, Cam has really fallen off from earlier this season for reasons I can't figure out. I'm sure there are plenty of calls for STIDDY TIME in New England. I'm already seeing Carolina trolls calling for Teddy to be benched for Will Grier. New England rolls the same way sometimes too.

Speaking of Teddy:

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Teddy fell onto that bench like he'd rather be in New Orleans than Charlotte. I can't say I blame him, to be honest.

The Titans, meanwhile, were wide right on a game-tying FG, and the Steelers did not fall from the ranks of the unbeaten.

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Unbelievable, I know, considering the Steelers were hot garbage in the second half.

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Yes, NotJosh, you're the No. 1 QB on the Football Team because you fell into the job.

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Meanwhile, Legion continues to fall for this guy:

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So dreamy!

So are we done here?

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We are.

THIS WEEK'S TRIVIA ANSWER

Ben DiNucci (a rookie from James Madison) and Garrett Gilbert (the 2008 Mr. Texas Football and Gatorade National Football Player of the Year who's now on his seventh NFL team and eighth pro football team)

The question: Who are the QB1 and QB2 for the Cowboys heading into this week's game?

MY MONDAY MORNING READING LIST

I spend my Sundays watching football. I spend Mondays reading (and listening) about what I just saw. Here's where my eyeballs (and earballs?) go on Mondays:

* The Ringer's winners and losers: Smart and droll take on the games we just saw, with some analytics and lots of GIFs. I love stuff like this:

But of all the players I would expect to know when scoring a touchdown was actually the wrong thing to do, Gurley would be at the top of my list. In 2018, he held himself out of the end zone twice while cementing Rams wins. He knew that in certain situations, time was more valuable than points, and was willing to pass up personal glory to let the team win. Sunday, he realized it again — but this time, he was a Falcon. So he did what Falcons do: fail by a slim margin in a never-before-seen disaster.

* Peter King FMIA: I skim the football stuff and skip the non-football stuff. I also CTRL-F "Carolina" and "Panthers" and am almost always disappointed. But if you like your football explained gently and at great volume, Pete's your guy.

PS: This week's column includes a section on his writing process (CTRL-F Newman! to find it). King says each FMIA column is between 9,500 and 12,500 words, with some copy filed in advance and the bulk of the story written between 5 p.m. Sunday and 3 a.m. Monday while he's also reporting and watching the Sunday late and night games. This is a phenomenal output under unbelievable deadline pressure. I'm a journalist, too, and I have mad respect for someone who can crank out the words like that.

That said, an editor with any balls would only run about half of what King writes. There's a lot of self-indulgent drivel in between obvious nonsense such as "I love watching Kyler Murray play football." King gets paid a lot of money for such keen insights! Wish it were me.

* Football Outsiders - Audibles at the Line: Imagine sitting at a bar (it's hard to remember what that's like, I know) and listening to smart people talk about the game as they're watching it. That's what this is: an in-real-time recap of each game. (Well, most games; sometimes they skip a few of the really awful ones.) It's heavy on the analytics, but it's smart and interesting.

Also recommended at Football Outsiders (and these come out later in the week): Any Given Sunday (a deep dive into one game), Word of Muth (a look at O-line play) and Quick Reads (with the week's DYAR numbers for each position group).

* The Draw Play: Everyone's favorite NFL cartoon, now with on-demand cartoon prop bets.

@baldyNFL (Brian Baldinger's Twitter feed):
Yeah, I know he's an ex-jock turned broadcaster with 234K Twitter followers. But I love his All-22 video analysis. I imagine a dude in his basement, aiming his cell phone at his monitor, and talking over the action. And that voice, man. It screams O-line all the way.

* Podcasts: Robert Mays at The Athletic and Kevin Clark at the Ringer, in that order. I like Mays better than Clark, but they're both good at breaking down the games. They both do a mid-week show that's worth listening to as well.

If any of you have good reads, please share. I'm always on the lookout for smart and entertaining football writing.

THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE

To pound today's theme into the f--king ground, Week 8 really fell off from Week 7. I mean, look at it:

Thursday: FAILcons at Panthers (Fox). Teddy's on prime time, and this is a pro-Bridgewater website, so I guess you have to watch. Or tune in to laugh at ATL.

Sunday early: Steelers-Ravens (CBS) and maybe Raiders-Browns (Fox) are the best of a so-so bunch. But this is the first time all season I've had my 1 p.m. Sunday free (because Carolina plays Thursday), so I might sit this one out. But Steelers-Ravens, so maybe not. Oh, and your coverage maps.

Sunday late: NINERS-SEAHAWKS (Fox). Yes, please! But that's a West Coast game. East Coast gets Saints-Bears. HARD PASS (for personal reasons unless Khalil Mack sacks both Brees, Payton and Hill on the same play, then HELL YEAH).

Sunday night: Cowboys-Eagles? Like, are you serious?! How is this game not flexed back into 2008? Or the 20th century?

Monday night: Bucs-Giants. Great, another crap-fest. I guess I'll watch TB12 throw three TDs in the first 10 minutes and go to bed early before Lavonte David eats Daniel Jones for a later dinner.

You missed one; Antonio Brown is going to fall into a crevasse and never be seen again.

*crosses fingers*

Oh cowboys.

That's good trivia

Enix, you're good at this.

Re: Metcalf at LB.
Basically SEA had that at SS with Kam Chancellor back in the day.

Here's Kam picking Cam for 90. This is the play where Marshawn grabs his dick and salutes Kam on his way to the end zone.

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I see your Kam Chancellor pick 6 and raise you with this:

Man, SEA-CAR had some epic battles.

Meanwhile, the Todd Gurley brain fart was worse than we thought. Here's Matt Ryan telling him to get the first down and get down and not score. WHOOPS

Why call it SEA-CAR when CARSEAT is right there and only requires adding one additional letter from Seattle?

Good stat for tonight from CBS on Twitter:

Teddy Bridgewater is the best QB against the spread in the last 20 years.

As a starter, he's 31-10 ATS (76%)

That's the best cover % by any QB since 2000 with a min. of 20 starts.

Rat Boy wrote:

Why call it SEA-CAR when CARSEAT is right there and only requires adding one additional letter from Seattle?

Rat Boy showing off why he was the OG NFL thread maker.

Atlanta learned the wrong lesson from Sunday. Settling for 3 now on 4th and less than 1 instead of at the end of game.

Between calling out the Houston Astros during the World Series (and actually using the word "cheat"), and that Vince Lombardi reference just now, I'm finding it harder to maintain my negative opinion on Joe Buck.

I didn't think it was possible, but the offenses we're seeing tonight are worse than the defenses, and the CARATL (ATLCAR?) defenses are pretty bad.

4th and 2 with a QB who hasn't missed tonight (2 drops), so run it and have your RB run into his blocker and tackle himself. Excellent play call.

Gurley into the end zone on purpose this time.

The city of Louisville would like Charles Harris to never play football again. And the falcons to never win another game.

Big oof Teddy B, that was not the throw to try, it was still 3rd down.

Yeah but maybe the falcons not punting until 5 min left in the game is the real problem.

Welp, now y'all see why I thought Carolina was a 3-13 team.

Teddy Bridgewater is miles better than last year's QBs, and Brian Burns and Jeremy Chinn are future stars (and maybe Derrick Brown, too, if he gets some better D-line teammates.

But ...

* The defense is consistently out of position on running plays.

* Tahir Whitehead is the sorriest MLB in the league.

* The secondary has only two NFL-caliber players (Jackson and Boston), and one of them (Jackson) is hurt). (I'm not counting Chinn here; he plays a hybrid LB-CB-blitzer-run stopper-rover kind of position.)

* The O-line is definitely less than the sum of its parts. Other than RG Taylor Moton, those parts don't add up to much at all.

* And as a Charlotte Observer columnist put it today, Teddy is tough but not clutch. I think that's exactly right. Granted, it's hard for Teddy to do much when he has two defenders waiting for him at the top of his dropback. But that last INT -- a back-foot floater into triple coverage -- is unacceptable.

* And as much as I love Carolina's all-black unis -- they are the best in the league IMO -- they are cursed and should be driven down to South Carolina and burned.

deleted for double-posting derp, sort of like Carolina's entire performance last night after they went up 14-6

So only 3 games today where both teams have winning records.

Steelers Ravens
Saints Bears
49ers Seachickens

Still unsure why the NFC West isn't flexed to tonight instead of the NFC Least dumpster fire.

Stele wrote:

Still unsure why the NFC West isn't flexed to tonight instead of the NFC Least dumpster fire.

Because the 49ers have to play Thursday night.

It's amazing how fast an Antonio Brown signing turned off the NFL for me. Just following now to keep up on news, and for things like a story on NFL.com that the Jags will have Minshew inactive next week, and the battle for starting QB will come down to a sixth-round rookie named Jake Luton and . . . Mike Glennon.

See? They already have familiar faces waiting for your arrival.

Dalvin Cook is so much fun to watch. Wish he was in Baltimore and not stuck in Minny.

Near the end of the first half, the Dolphins have 56 yards. And 28 points.

Lots and lots and lots of turnovers. Bortles-esque.

Their D seems to be penetrating on every play and McVay can't seem to figure a way to stop it. Shocking.

I'm getting more and more concerned over Lamar's decision making. It doesn't seem to be getting much better, but maybe it's only because I'm expecting a 23 yr old, 3rd yr QB to be perfect (see: Mahomes).

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Near the end of the first half, the Dolphins have 56 yards. And 28 points.

Tua is downright tebow-esque. Miami had 78 and 88 yard fumble and point return TDs for him. All he does is win.

Bills take care of business and Pats lose 4 in a row.

Why the hell wasn't time put back on the clock for defense injury in Baltimore?

Should have had 5-7 more seconds, at least one more play