Praying to porcelain gods - changes wrought by parenthood

I know there are some GWJ parents out there that have children past the potty trained stage. And I say to you: "How in the name of all that is holy did you ever figure out how to do that?"

Seriously, anyone have a methodology they were happy with? Products, chairs, dances to oft ignored god Urethra? Help a sister out here.

I still haven''t figured it out totally for myself.

A really big funnel.

Hi.
We basically waited until they were ready. Which was at about 2.5 years old or so (if you wait, they have better communication skills). We started by switching to pullups and having two potty chairs. One in her room, and one in the bathroom. We read a book about the subject (there are hundreds) to the kid and then they decided when to make the switch full time. Some kids take longer, some don''t, try not to ever shame them.

Every kid is different though.

Every kid is different though.

Completely true. There is no reason to feel bad if your kid takes longer than the ""average"" age of potty training.

Unless you become as old as Mex. But that is another story.

"GamerDad" wrote:

We basically waited until they were ready. Which was at about 2.5 years old or so.

Lovely. My first son is four months away from being two. . .

My second is due to arrive at the end of May, but my wife says it could be any day now.

So, I have a good half-decade to go through this, eh?

I still remember being potty trained. Perhaps that''s because I actually have a surprisingly good memory of my very early childhood -- or perhaps it''s because I once fell in the toilet, ass-first. See, I think I zoned out when my parents were explaining that the seat had to be down if I wanted to sit on the potty. To my credit, I only made that mistake once.

Potty training is absolutely different for each kid. You cannot rush it. Expect accidents. No matter how frustrated you are, never - EVER get mad at the kid for having an accident. It will set you back 10 steps.

We bought one of those potty seats that sits on top of the toilet, that worked great for my first. He is 3. My daughter is 1 year old this month. My son goes to daycare part time, this was an immense help. He potty trained way ahead of the curve.

At any rate, let them wear undies. Expect some soiled clothes. Assure them it''s ok. One day they will come through.

At any rate, let them wear undies. Expect some soiled clothes. Assure them it''s ok. One day they will come through.

Ahem...

I still haven''t figured it out totally for myself.

We found that making it into a game worked really well. We made paper targets and placed them in the toilet, and he had a blast sinking them (sorry if that''s a bad mental image for you non-parents, but oh well!)

Now, if you have a girl, I don''t have the foggiest as to how to approach this. Good luck! And I am pulling for you...the day that we no longer had to do the diaper/training pants (what a joke there!) thing was a momentous occasion that I have still to see surpassed!

try beating with a newspaper.... Oh wait you mean a human child my wife and I are working on that with our son now. He''s at the point where occationally he''ll remember to tell us when he has to go. Not bad since he''s not 2 yet. We''re thinking of gettign him the ""feel"" pull-ups. We hope they''ll help.

OK...having three kids gone through...here''s my advice...and yes...all three are different...but heres the baseline

Girls tend to pick it up easier at their own pace - boys you have to ''trick'' into via games/incentives, because, lets be honest, if someone would change us, most guys would be ok being in diapers till 18 or so...we just don''t care...lol

First trick - put the little mini kids pot next to where you do the business, and let the kids sit there while you do what you have to do (see, this is how adults go to the bathroom, etc.).

Next - for the boy, it was a combo of games (put fruit loops in the toilet to symbolize where the business goes, and then sink them while peeing) and incentive - he wanted to go to Pre-K at age 3, and we told him no way if he wasn''t potty trained.

Next - you almost treat them like a dog...incentives-wise - they go potty, praise them, give them a snack, etc... But as they mention above, when they miss or have accidents, do not get upset, just be encouraging - for instance, after an accident, I''d have them sit on the toilet seat for a minute or so - to let them know thats where they should go, but I told them to do it just in case they needed to go any more. Frame it in a positive manner, because they will feel bad.

Next - when they are in cloth heavy underwear or pullup diapers (a Godsend), if they even LOOK like they may have to go, even a slight gleam in their eyes, rush them to the restroom - they get frustrated because at their age, its tough for them to know when is the proper time to go...vice waiting till its too late and they pee on themselves.

Finally, as the last straws when all else fails - this is the desperation (boy) method - put them in the thick underwear pullups (not diapers), and when they have an accident, let it, um...sit for a while..not long...3-5 minutes is plenty...the discomfort will work its magic on them that this is not the way to go.

Girls really are much easier - my first took her diapers off about 14 months on her own...she then went back into diapers about 1 month later, and then finally at about 18 months she was potty trained. My son, on the other hand was in the upper 2''s, while my last daughter was right around 2-2.5.

Hope this helps

Sometimes, you can prep them with the books, and do all the right things, and explain, and they still need some trigger to get them into it. Your job is to find the song or potty or book or whatever that interests your child. Some kids may want to pick out their own potty, for example - but they don''t know how to tell you that. Others want someone in the room so they don''t fall in. Some don''t want anyone to see, since it''s private business. Just keep trying and you''ll come up with the right combination for yours.

I''ve known kids who would not use a potty that did not play them a song when they went, and I''ve known kids who ran screaming - literally - the first time that bizarre tinkling music arose from beneath them. It''s all a puzzle at that age, as far as I''m concerned. (And believe me, no matter how psychically scarring that musical potty is, the run screaming reaction is about as unexpectedly funny as it gets.)

Our 3 year old has gotten to the point of using the potty to manipulate us. He won''t use it regularly, but for example every night after I *think* he is asleep in bed he comes out of his room and asks to use the potty....grrrrrr. He knows I will never deny him that so it is frustrating. At this point I''m just hoping he decides he likes it better than diapers on his own...we''ve done everything we can to encourage and provide opportunities...

A couple of notes from running 2 boys through it (3rd is still a while away).

Boys will learn slower than girls.
Don''t fret about it, they will be potty trained before JK/SK
My first trained at about 39 months my second was closer to 42( but then he is a very stubborn child)
They will usually train peeing before taking a dump
Pull-ups are useless(IMHO). At least we found them to be. They absorb liquid and thus do not let the child know when they made a mistake. by a whole stack of the cheapest undies you can find. You might have a few ""just throw them away"" moments.

We used treats ( couple smarties, some gummi worms every time he was succesful). We would also time him and have him sit once an hour or so just to see if anything would happen, regardless of whether he said he had to go or not.

Also mine tended to get very quiet and wander away to a private area before they were going to go. We watched for that and grabbed them and put them on the toilet when they did that.

When we figured he was aware of what was going on we switched him to wearing underwear. Yes it was extremely messy at times. But having him be aware of when an accident occured let him feel how uncomfortable it was. With a pull-up he either did not know, or did not care because he could not feel it.

Don''t make an issue out of it. If it starts to become a battle of wills it can take even longer, and don''t make them feel bad about accidents, or shame them.

we''ve done everything we can to encourage and provide opportunities...

Have you tried monetary bribes?

Put out papers in the kitchen like you do for dogs, works great.

If you are female, you might get offended by this post and are advised to skip the white part of this post:

"Lobo" wrote:

I still remember being potty trained. Perhaps that''s because I actually have a surprisingly good memory of my very early childhood -- or perhaps it''s because I once fell in the toilet, ass-first. See, I think I zoned out when my parents were explaining that the seat had to be down if I wanted to sit on the potty. To my credit, I only made that mistake once.

at the risk of being permanantly blacklisted among a certain percentage of the readers here:
[color=white]It sounds like you were smarter at that age than most adult women. Most of the ones I know always complain that if the guy leave the seat up the end up in the thing.[/color]

That out of the way, don''t push the kid into potty training. Usually that only makes it worse, social pressure will usually get them to that point all by itself (kids almost always want to be a ""big boy/girl"", and do things like the grown-ups do).

Every morning, I get up and go upstairs, and the Ducki Prince and I do the morning pee.
On weekends, we usually do the same right after naptime, though it doesn''t always work. It''s just become habit, though we still get some tantrums because he doesn''t want to pee on his potty, but bargaining/reward-reminding usually helps.

Aside from those two times, though, I think the pull-up diapers are too absorbent and he is usually more intent on whatever he''s playing with/reading/dancing to to notice it''s ""time"" and go potty.

What do I know, though, this is my first(and only) time through this. I''m making it up as I go.

Every morning, I get up and go upstairs, and the Ducki Prince and I do the morning pee.

we have a fine tradition of double pee-ers in our house. Seems a lot more fun for them to have a race with dad, and since the have itty bitty bladders thay always win mind you things get a little crowded with the adventerous triple pee-ers

Not sure if I will ever attempt the quadruple pee-er when the youngest get''s to that stage.

and always remember, don''t cross the streams.

and always remember, don''t cross the streams.

That would be bad?

My daughter just turned 13 months.....I am so not looking forward to this

I mean, I''m looking forward to the end result, but I just had a nightmare of a incident last week where she needed to go ""number 2,"" in the parlance of our times, and was not wearing a diaper. We had put her, briefly, into a swimsuit. Apparently, it was just enough time for her to do her business. My wife was at the store. I was by myself. Oh God....the horror....the horror...

"duckilama" wrote:
and always remember, don''t cross the streams.

That would be bad?

I see it''s time for you to watch Ghostbusters again.

Do you think if I put underoos on my puppy, she''s learn that crapping in them isn''t fun? Maybe I should pee on the lawn next to her?

"baggachipz" wrote:

Do you think if I put underoos on my puppy, she''s learn that crapping in them isn''t fun? Maybe I should pee on the lawn next to her?

Guns help with dogs Bang... They''ll pee quick when that scared

I''m never having kids...

Absolutely positively nothing wrong with crossing the streams...amuses the hell out of the kids and adults...

but a warning...be wary, for he will pee on you, but you cannot retaliate by peeing on him. (learn to pee only with your right hand, so you can put your left on his shoulder to keep him from ''drifting'' into your stream...)

learn to pee only with your right hand, so you can put your left on his shoulder to keep him from ''drifting'' into your stream...

Sage advice, indeed.

but a warning...be wary, for he will pee on you, but you cannot retaliate by peeing on him.

I''m available on a contract basis, if any of you ever need someone to pee on your children, for you.

I''m available on a contract basis, if any of you ever need someone to pee on your children, for you.

hmmm does a quick reference check...

Do not eat an entire jar of pickled onions, along with a two litre carton of milk.

Just... don''t. I don''t care how tasty it may sound in your head.

If it''s possible to actually sh*t out your soul, I think I''m about ready to do that. Oh my God.

yeah like that is ever going to happen in this lifetime. Mind you I may contact you to take a run at Chumpy for me.

Yeah, the prince seems more willing to stay on the potty with the Duck than he does with me. But I think he''s mastered the time and level of screaming temper tantrum that I can tolerate before I give up. (The Force is strong in this one.) The Duck has much more tolerance than I. (The Zen is stronger than the Force.)

Yeah, the pullup - training diapers seem to have been an expensive waste of time. He seems to notice *less* when he''s wet than he did with the regular pullups.

He''s about 2.5, and he was doing so well before he turned 2, but we''re kinda back to ground zero again, and I can''t figure out why.

I like the target idea, one of my other friends mentioned that as something she did for her boys.

I tried bribery with stickers and treats, but that hasn''t created the Pavlovian response I was hoping for. Apparently, my behavioral theories are just that. Heh. The next level of bribery I''m going to try is ""naked time"". He loves to be naked. So, I think I''ll explain that he can be naked *after* he uses the potty.

Maybe real undies are the trick, it''s worth a shot. I''m also thinking about enrolling him in a pre-preschool program for a couple of days a week, perhaps seeing other potty trained kiddies will help.