Anxiety -- How do you deal?

I know how bad my stuff is, but we’ve moved around so much that I’ve taken for granted how important routine and consistency can be. I’m learning that now.

I sleep under a weighted blanket now. It can't fix everything of course, but it wouldn't be hyperbolic to say it's been life-changing. So I'm glad you got one.

clover wrote:

I sleep under a weighted blanket now. It can't fix everything of course, but it wouldn't be hyperbolic to say it's been life-changing. So I'm glad you got one.

Thanks. It's definitely been life changing. So much so that once I figured out about that I looked into what people who used them did during the daytime. Apparently there's a whole world of weighted / constrictive vests that seem to help as well. I doubt they make them in my size.

DSGamer wrote:
clover wrote:

I sleep under a weighted blanket now. It can't fix everything of course, but it wouldn't be hyperbolic to say it's been life-changing. So I'm glad you got one.

Thanks. It's definitely been life changing. So much so that once I figured out about that I looked into what people who used them did during the daytime. Apparently there's a whole world of weighted / constrictive vests that seem to help as well. I doubt they make them in my size.

Tailors exist. Online tailors exist.

Jonman wrote:
DSGamer wrote:
clover wrote:

I sleep under a weighted blanket now. It can't fix everything of course, but it wouldn't be hyperbolic to say it's been life-changing. So I'm glad you got one.

Thanks. It's definitely been life changing. So much so that once I figured out about that I looked into what people who used them did during the daytime. Apparently there's a whole world of weighted / constrictive vests that seem to help as well. I doubt they make them in my size.

Tailors exist. Online tailors exist.

I wonder if they would just make one. Looking at things like this right now.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/4885468...

One thing that can give a similar benefit to the weighted vests is wearing a tight long-sleeved base layer (a compression shirt), but the thicker the better... like a light neoprene-type material or something where you feel a bit "strapped in" with it on. You might have better luck finding your size in something like that.

Does anyone here have experience with looping thoughts? I typed something up that I think might be appropriate for her, but instead I'm going to ask it in the meditation thread for now.

Music or videogames, pinball, drawing, movies in a dark room.
When that fails, I go off the rails and turn to masturbation and stuff like that, but it only works for a little while.

Any suggestions about specific brands of weighted blankets or things to look for in them?

MathGoddess wrote:

Any suggestions about specific brands of weighted blankets or things to look for in them?

For my part I just went on Amazon and found the best rated weighted blanket that was reasonably priced and this is what I ended up with.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0...

If you click through the options for this particular manufacturer different styles of blankets will have different weights. The recommendation is to buy a blanket that's 10% of your body weight. So you might have to click through the different styles to find the one that fits your bed size and your weight correctly.

Now there are many other brands on Amazon and on the larger Internet, of course. And it does feel like the easiest way to buy one of these is on the Internet.

I can't speak to other brands yet, but the things I was looking for were glass beads instead of plastic filling (apparently this is cooler) and material that felt comfortable.

I'd never even heard of weighted blankets, but having looked them up and what they are supposed to do, I have to wonder if that's why I've always liked having a lot of sheets, blankets, comforter, etc. even in the summer, and have had a more difficult time sleeping with say, just a lightweight sheet.

bekkilyn wrote:

I'd never even heard of weighted blankets, but having looked them up and what they are supposed to do, I have to wonder if that's why I've always liked having a lot of sheets, blankets, comforter, etc. even in the summer, and have had a more difficult time sleeping with say, just a lightweight sheet.

Could be. My wife and I almost always used a giant comforter with the AC on. I think that was the case for us.

My wife has pretty bad anxiety (which has largely been controlled by medication but there's still some bad days). I got her a weighted blanket for Christmas. While I don't think it's a cure-all, she really enjoys sleeping under it. She also voiced concern last night for the summer when it gets hot as she uses no other blankets other than that. Looks like the fan will be on high for most of the warmer months If you get a blanket, make sure you read the reviews. The one I got her has sewn pockets in it so all of the beads pretty much stay where they are supposed to be and not end up on the edges of the blanket (some of the cheaper ones aren't made quite as well).

Very poorly! And only one person in my life is considerate towards my anxiety. Woo! Heh

BoogtehWoog wrote:

Very poorly! And only one person in my life is considerate towards my anxiety. Woo! Heh

Copycat! I said poorly on the last page!

(Hugs)

My husband is sympathetic and supportive, but it's been a crazy rough few days.
I'm reading a book of essays by Samantha Irby (We are Never Meeting in Real Life) and she wrote, "Not being able to deal with your life is humiliating. It makes you feel weak." which really resonated with me since I've been rather out of it since Friday.

The anxiety and depression get tumbled together in a self-supporting spiral. It doesn't help that I'm starting to see signs of perimenopause with hot flashes, strange dreams, and EXCITING mood swings.
I have a dr appt tomorrow. Will see what she suggests. Was able to eat today, so that's good, and just off the treadmill for half hour walk, so that's good.

Back to minute by minute for me....but there will be an end to this bout in a bit....just have to get through it.
Started a King's Bounty game and so that's taking some time and providing some distraction.

I think perimenopause was also responsible for a lot of my anxiety a couple years ago. I also experienced a very severe energy drop and could barely do anything even though I wanted to. Going through major life transition (which can be anxiety-inducing in and of itself) AND hormonal stuff is definitely not the greatest experience.

My husband had his first personal encounter with a panic attack last month and one of the first things he said after I helped him recenter was that "if what he just went through in a morning is anything like what I deal with on a daily basis, he can't imagine doing it himself."

This from a man who's first wife had anxiety issues and his second wife (me) who actively manages my anxiety through behavior, therapy, and medication.

It really shook him up and made me brought back to me why I've pushed so hard for our teen to learn coping skills.

It was also nice to get credit for doing all the regular things I do on a increased difficulty level.

I luckily haven't had a full blown panic attack in roughly 2 years, but even after my first one almost exactly 10 years ago I knew that I wouldn't wish that upon anybody.

Sorry that your husband had to experience one, but like you said, the upside is that he now understands you much better than before.

RedJen wrote:

My husband had his first personal encounter with a panic attack last month and one of the first things he said after I helped him recenter was that "if what he just went through in a morning is anything like what I deal with on a daily basis, he can't imagine doing it himself."

This from a man who's first wife had anxiety issues and his second wife (me) who actively manages my anxiety through behavior, therapy, and medication.

It really shook him up and made me brought back to me why I've pushed so hard for our teen to learn coping skills.

It was also nice to get credit for doing all the regular things I do on a increased difficulty level.

I've had a similar experience recently with my little brother. He started having panic attacks and he's changed a lot as a result. Prior to this he was somewhat dismissive of therapy and he believed me, but I don't think he understood me.

Now he sees a counselor regularly and his whole attitude around mental health and self care has changed completely. In my last really acute situation I went through he was really helpful to me because of this, I believe.

It has always frustrated me that people I know trying to understand my mental health issues inevitably fail no matter what educational resources I bring to bear. It's like the army of the dead in Game of Thrones. Unless you experience it yourself, it's all snarks and grumpkins.

I decided to tackle my anxiety of being in public a bit, so I went to a coffee shop and got some tea. Drove my fun car and everything, made an event of it. Now I'm just practicing feeling normal, browsing on my phone. Saw this thread and it seemed an appropriate place and time to make a post.

Well done. I'm a big believer in exposure therapy when done right. I've managed to keep flying (one of my biggest fears previously) through a really tumultuous time. I'm also manage to go into public in spite of really bad derealization, which is my biggest personal win on some days.

Had a rough night last night and couldn't fall asleep. Put on weighted blanket and then slept really well. Glad I got one!

MathGoddess wrote:

Had a rough night last night and couldn't fall asleep. Put on weighted blanket and then slept really well. Glad I got one!

Awesome. Sleeping every night under a weighted blanket right now. I’m much more stable and I think it’s part of the reason why.

Did someone have weighted sheets that they recommend?

We recently bought a new comforter that's lighter than our old one, plus with the warmer months coming soon I feel like it might be a good purchase. Either that, or I need to figure out how to convince our cat to sleep on my chest for longer than half an hour at a time, and without being a pest in other ways.

DSGamer wrote:
MathGoddess wrote:

Had a rough night last night and couldn't fall asleep. Put on weighted blanket and then slept really well. Glad I got one!

Awesome. Sleeping every night under a weighted blanket right now. I’m much more stable and I think it’s part of the reason why.

We bought in to the Hush Iced weighted blanket kickstarter. I'm super excited but now just have to wait till it ships! Glad to hear people find weighted blankets to be a real benefit!

Does anyone use one of those natural sunlight/sunrise alarm clock thingees with different colors and natural bird sounds and whatnot? I am considering one because they seem so much less jarring than the regular alarm clocks, make it so you don't have to try to wake up in the dark, and so may contribute to less anxiety right off the bat in the morning, but I'm wondering if they really work and if you don't just get so used to them that you sleep right through the light and the nature sounds anyway?

zeroKFE wrote:

Did someone have weighted sheets that they recommend?

We recently bought a new comforter that's lighter than our old one, plus with the warmer months coming soon I feel like it might be a good purchase. Either that, or I need to figure out how to convince our cat to sleep on my chest for longer than half an hour at a time, and without being a pest in other ways.

This is the one I initially bought and recommended here.

I still use it for sleeping, but I have a sneaking suspicion that some of the beads are leaking between pockets, so I bought this blanket for my main use in my living room.

The latter blanket feels like it's consistently more evenly weighted at this point and would recommend it over the cheaper one.

bekkilyn wrote:

Does anyone use one of those natural sunlight/sunrise alarm clock thingees with different colors and natural bird sounds and whatnot? I am considering one because they seem so much less jarring than the regular alarm clocks, make it so you don't have to try to wake up in the dark, and so may contribute to less anxiety right off the bat in the morning, but I'm wondering if they really work and if you don't just get so used to them that you sleep right through the light and the nature sounds anyway?

I tried a Philips light clock, but never took to how hard it was to set, to be honest.

The real game changer for me on this front was getting an Apple Watch, as silly as that sounds. I now sleep with an Apple Watch (any smart watch would work) because it lightly vibrates to wake me up. I think that's a much more pleasant alarm than any sound is.

I use the Apple Watch with a sleep tracking app that wakes me to the song of the “Vigil” track from Mass Effect.

The app is called pillow and it’s super easy to set up. It’ll wake you by a certain time and if it detects you’re in a lighter sleep pattern a little before that, it’ll wake you then. I do recommend it, it’s been a game changer, even though I still don’t like getting up before 7am.