NFL 2017 Post-Draft Offseason

"Matt Barkley currently has more career receiving touchdowns than Kevin White." Oh that's brutal.

This year, as a reward for some good school work, I told him I’d take him to a regular season game. My friend with season tickets told me the Panthers and 49ers games were available and I told my son to choose. He chose the 49ers cause there is at least a better chance he could see them score once this time. Can’t argue with his logic.

Yep.

*Legion* wrote:

Just getting them out of his system now.

Damnsammit wrote

*Legion* wrote:

I have a feeling there is going to be a lot of crow to be eaten sometime this year.

Roy WillieBlake Bortles is going to shut them haters up this year... I can feel it.

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

Clutch League

*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

Clutch League

It's only clutch if they win games, which they don't.

garion333 wrote:
*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

Clutch League

It's only clutch if they win games, which they don't.

Clench League?

Legion, you're going to want to click on some other link.

For everyone else ...

Spoiler:

... it's the WYTS: Jacksonville edition!

Deadspin wrote:

The Jaguars have lost 11 or more games for six straight seasons, and they’ve done it all without managing to secure the top pick in the draft even once during that stretch. At least when Cleveland loses, they go all out. By contrast, the Jaguars put on a cheap sheen of continuity and professionalism that renders them forgettable even when they’re steadily smashing records for hideous incompetence. Gus Bradley was 14-48 when the Jags finally, mercifully let him go. (In Jacksonville, they don’t fire you so much as grudgingly admit that they never should have hired you to begin with). That .226 winning percentage makes Bradley the second worst coach in NFL history. That’s the Jaguars for you: never quite bold enough to be the absolute worst.

The rest is just as glorious.

It's weird that whole article was nothing more than just a picture of Blake Bortles.

Wait, there were words? They were necessary?

garion333 wrote:
*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

Clutch League

It's only clutch if they win games, which they don't.

Flat out untrue. The Jaguars have never had a 0 or 1 win season. They have always won games.

*Legion* wrote:
garion333 wrote:
*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:
*Legion* wrote:

So if I draft all Jaguars, I'll dominate the fantasy league?

If you can find a league where only fourth quarter stats matter, that strategy is patently golden.

Clutch League

It's only clutch if they win games, which they don't.

Flat out untrue. The Jaguars have never had a 0 or 1 win season. They have always won games.

#humblebrag

As the Deadspin article points out, that's actually one of the problems with the Jaguars; they're always bad, but they're never awful enough to get the #1 pick in a draft with a solid QB. So you wind up with the Garbage Man at QB, at least until he apparently hits the bar. He's like Florida Man version of Manziel, apparently?

And the Ravens' offensive injury plague continues.

Enix wrote:

Legion, you're going to want to click on some other link.

For everyone else ...

Spoiler:

... it's the WYTS: Jacksonville edition!

Deadspin wrote:

The Jaguars have lost 11 or more games for six straight seasons, and they’ve done it all without managing to secure the top pick in the draft even once during that stretch. At least when Cleveland loses, they go all out. By contrast, the Jaguars put on a cheap sheen of continuity and professionalism that renders them forgettable even when they’re steadily smashing records for hideous incompetence. Gus Bradley was 14-48 when the Jags finally, mercifully let him go. (In Jacksonville, they don’t fire you so much as grudgingly admit that they never should have hired you to begin with). That .226 winning percentage makes Bradley the second worst coach in NFL history. That’s the Jaguars for you: never quite bold enough to be the absolute worst.

The rest is just as glorious.

That was quite the good article. I loved this walk down memory lane:

To illustrate, let’s remember some Jags first round picks since Coughlin was fired:

Byron Leftwich

Reggie Williams

Matt Jones

Reggie Nelson (who became a Pro Bowler only after we traded him to Cincinnati)

Derrick Harvey

Blaine Gabbert

Justin Blackmon

Luke Joeckel

Blake Bortles

I mean, look at that sh*t! Not to mention that yes, we drafted a punter before 5 picks before Russell Wilson.

Being a Muslim-American is a lot like being a Jaguars fan. For an immigrant group/expansion franchise we’ve been decently successful in America/the NFL, but every time you want to cozy up to the establishment you get abruptly cast as a disease on this country and/or sent to London.

Also:

Well, if football's becoming an issue, might as well.

IMAGE(https://i.imgflip.com/1thulh.jpg)

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

Hall of what game? Is that football?

It was the first preseason game of the year and it was a Thursday night game. That's like double the reason to go watch something else instead.

I watched a WNBA game instead. No regrets.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

I'm looking forward to that Knight kid starting in Week 13 for my Browns.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

IMAGE(https://pbs.twimg.com/card_img/893492488559706114/GWqAB_pW?format=jpg&name=600x314)

Blaine Gabbert near perfect for Cardinals in Hall of Fame Game

*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

IMAGE(https://pbs.twimg.com/card_img/893492488559706114/GWqAB_pW?format=jpg&name=600x314)

Blaine Gabbert near perfect for Cardinals in Hall of Fame Game

IMAGE(http://mygoditsraining.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/RuinedUniverse.gif)

*Legion* wrote:
MilkmanDanimal wrote:

Zero comments on the Hall of Fame game.

I'm so proud of you all.

IMAGE(https://pbs.twimg.com/card_img/893492488559706114/GWqAB_pW?format=jpg&name=600x314)

Blaine Gabbert near perfect for Cardinals in Hall of Fame Game

It was only the preseason opener and a game void of any real star power, but Gabbert finally looked like the quarterback he was expected to be when he left Missouri following his junior year.
His high completion rate is especially noteworthy because he has completed just 56 percent of his passes over his career.

So Cutler is a better sign than Kap? Hmmm....

I don't Colphin Dolphin? He couldn't go to a team with a better rhyming scheme for a nickname? "It's a Slacer Packer", "I Don't Give A Damn Ram", or "From My Demeanor You Might Guess I'd Taken A Handful Of Pills Bill" work, but I can't find a good apathy-related nickname based on the Dolphins.

I guess I could go with "Do I Have To Go In Again 'Phin", if I'm desperate.

karmajay wrote:

So Cutler is a better sign than Kap? Hmmm....

Yeah . . . not so much.

MilkmanDanimal wrote:
karmajay wrote:

So Cutler is a better sign than Kap? Hmmm....

Yeah . . . not so much.

Well... all things equal, maybe not.

But it's August, and Cutler played for Adam Gase and knows the offense already. So he's clearly the better pick for the team to sign at this point.

Now if only the Niners had hired Gase instead of Tomsula, then Kaep would have been experienced in Gase's offense.