Weight loss and weight management catch-all!

Starting Weight (12/28/13): 295.0
Previous Weight (10/28/14): 221.0
Current Weight (11/5/14): 226.8
Change: +5.8
Target Weight: 195
Progress: 68.2 / 100

Vacation was not kind. I ate pretty poorly. I overate at meals and snacked way more than usual. I earned those 6 pounds.

On a positive note, I completed a 5k over vacation (It actually turned into closer to a 10k because I followed a couple people right past the turn-around point... doh). It was my first ever race, and I had a blast. I am really pissed at myself for being stupid and missing the turn around. I was doing really well for someone who hadn't trained one lick.

I annoyed at the cold weather. San Diego was beautiful, but being back in the midwest's 40s has been rough. I had this huge runner's high and would really like to keep it going, but I'm not super interested in running on a treadmill (or paying for access to one), and I'm not going to want to run outside during the cold, snowy, icy winter. Ugh.

Another positive note, I weighed in again since Wednesday and I'm down a couple pounds already, so the setback shouldn't end up being that large.

I've set my next goal at the 100 pounds total mark - no timeframe yet. The idea of being under 200 actually kinda freaks me out. I've never even let myself dream of losing that much, but with the progress I've made so far, I think it's a real possibility - especially if I can increase my activity (some running, biking, and minor lifting).

Question for anyone who has gone paleo or a version of that diet. I'm having a medical issue where I'd be well served by changing my diet to lower glycemic vegetables and lots of protein. I'm trying to figure out a quick, easy meal to take to work and would love some advice.

It's time for my first weigh-in on the new thread, yay!

Height: 6'1" Start: 11/15/2012 | 250 lbs | 33 BMI | ~36% fat Previous: 10/14/2014 | 176.1 lbs | 23.2 BMI | ~15% fat [b]Current: 11/09/2014 | 174.5 lbs | 23 BMI | ~14% fat[/b] Goal: 01/01/2015 | 170 lbs | 22.4 BMI | ~14% fat

I'm inclined to believe that body fat drop despite the very minimal weight loss, simply due to the fact I'm doing a lot more exercise lately.

I'd hoped to reach 170 by December 1, but that's not going to happen; pushing my final deadline back to 2015 now. Still, I'm happy with the progress, officially losing 75 pounds just before my two year anniversary of the weight loss regimen.

Now I'll have a good new years resolution: maintain.

Starting Weight (12/28/13): 295.0
Previous Weight (11/5/14): 226.8
Current Weight (11/12/14): 222.6
Change: -4.2
Target Weight: 195
Progress: 72.4 / 100

Starting Weight (12/28/13): 295.0
Previous Weight (11/12/14): 222.6
Current Weight (11/18/14): 212.2
Change: -10.4
Target Weight: 195
Progress: 82.8 / 100

I don't have any clue what is going on. I don't feel like I earned a 10 pound loss, but I'll certainly take it.

Back at it. Weighed 206/207 pounds earlier today.

Two annoying things this week.

1 - my scale is weird. I weighed in yesterday at 216 and change. This morning 211 then 210 then 214 then 222 and finally 216. Make up your damn mind!

Basically, I'm somewhere (everywhere?) in the 210-220 range. Got it.

2 - People who keep asking if I'm done losing, or worse suggesting that I should stop. If I were getting unhealthily small, sure, but I'm still over 210, and it's not a fit and healthy 210.

I don't know what my final maintenance weight will be. It might end up being where I am now, but I've been doing something that is working. Why would I stop now? If anything, I'm feeling like I need to start working harder.

I want to be healthy. I want to be fit. Today, I am only healthy by comparison with where I was. I am healthier but not yet healthy. I am in better shape, but not good shape.

The part that irritates me the most is that I'm told to stop by people who are overweight. I don't think a single healthy, fit person has told me to stop. I feel like I'm discouraged to lose more for fear of making them look bad. If I stop now, I'm still fat; I lost weight, but it's not like I got skinny. They will avoid feeling guilty about not getting skinny too.

I feel like people, people who I love, are attempting to shame me into remaining unhealthy, and it really hurts. I've felt a lot of shame about my weight throughout my life, but the people who would try and build me up when I was topping 300 tearing me down as I approach 200 hurts so much worse than any fat joke, nickname, or broken chair ever could.

edit: well, that little rant opened up an emotional floodgate I wasn't expecting. Now it's a little dusty in here and I suddenly notice I'm hungry. Nice try, stress eating.

I don't know that I've encountered that level of getting crap, kaos, but the more I lose the more I learn who I cannot share that with. Other teachers at my school, if I say *anything* about my weight, take it as a judgment/accusation of them and start to get defensive, and even slightly aggressive in some cases. It's as if we are a living testimonial, a sign walking around that says "Loser" only they think the arrow is pointing at them.

So, let me say kaos, that *I* am happy for you. *I* am proud of you.

I am down about 30 lbs since I started this. I've reached a point where the nutritionist tells me I might stay the same weight for a while, cause I'm getting in shape, and that shape weighs more. If I hear one more person tell me muscle weighs more than fat...gargghghgh. But I see your journey, and the journey of other folks on this and the previous thread and you give me hope. And that helps a lot.

So...you know. f*ck them and their own low self-esteem projections onto you. They should be able to look beyond their own little worlds and be happy for you. But I'm seeing that anyone who thinks they're 20 lbs or more overweight is *not* proud of me. They resent the crap out of any little sense of accomplishment and happiness I might feel about continuing to eat healthy and get in shape.

Because they think I'm doing it to make them look bad? How self-centered and f*cked up is that?

Anyway, their problem. Not mine. Not yours.

We rock.

Hey, it's happy overeating day here in the States!

Just finished the big meal and I've pegged it at 1200 calories, with 500 left for the day.

All I need to do is survive dessert and I'm home free!

Good job on the weight loss Kaos. I'm proud of you.

I was lucky enough to have a group of people that supported me through the processes, and continue to support me now. Can't imagine what you're going through.

Just thought I would share this with you folks.

I was at my gym before the Thanksgiving break and my trainer tells me "Paleo, I need you to join this 'maintain don't gain' program for the holidays. I don't have enough people signed up.".

So I ask her "well, how do you know I don't want to gain?"

Without missing a beat, she gave me a dismissive look and said "because you're fat".

Wow, that's seriously harsh.

And Kaos, I've seen similar. I don't think it's intentional, but people have a mental model for what they expect based on the past, and certainly there may be subconscious jealousy at another person's success. I've had people tell me I should stop losing weight too, but I know what I want and I ignore them. They frame it as concern but I know that's not it; health outcomes improve all the way down to 20 bmi and I'm nowhere near that!

It sounds like you need a new trainer Pal. And I am really sorry.

Fell off the wagon. Time to get back on.

Starting Weight: 270 lbs (08/25/2012)
Current Weight: 188 lbs (11/28/2014)
Short Term Goal: 186 lbs by (12/27/2014)

Right. Jumping in here because Thanksgiving was really bad to me, and the rest of this 4-day weekend will destroy me because my will power is at an all time low due to turkey overdose/napping.

Currently at 165, and I want to drop to 155 (this includes working out with weights to get rid of my turkey arms, and running to get some stamina). I want this to be done by the time beach season comes back around (even though I don't really go to the beach except for play pinball and Skeeball, but... it's a nice reason). So, a pound and a half every two weeks should be enough.

I just need to stay away from booze, and snacking while boozed up. That's always been my downfall. Help.

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for their kind words this week. I really, really appreciate it.

I think I was projecting a lot of my insecurities onto those around me. I know that my friends and family are proud of what I've accomplished.

I continue to be annoyed with my scale. I weighed in Sunday at 205, today at 187 (wtf?!?!) and 223. It's definitely time for a new scale. I've been considering asking for the Fitbit Aria scale for Xmas, but I'm unsure what it does that is 2-5x better than a regular, non-wifi scale. Is the wifi just updating fitbit.com so I don't have to type the information in? If so, that hardly seems worth it. I'm open to any thoughts, comments, suggestions you all have. Iirc, at least a couple of you have the Aria scale, so I'd love to know if you think it's worth it.

I think the whole scale situation played heavily into my feelings last week (that and the prospect of overeating for Thanksgiving). If I can't trust the scale I've been using, I can't trust that I've actually seen the results I think I have. There is a part of me that is worried that I'm 10-20 pounds behind where I thought I was. If that turns out to be the case, I will be really disappointed, but there's nothing I can do other than buckle down and keep on keeping on.

I'm also struggling to adjust the concept of my identity with the reality of my body. That sentence alone points out a core problem, which is that my identity has been largely tied to my body. Being the fat kid and then a fat adult has always been a large part of my identity. When I think about who and what I am, I can't help but have one of the first adjectives that comes to mind be weight-based and typically with a negative connotation. It's been so ingrained in me since Elementary or Middle school. When I look in the mirror, I can't help but focus on the negatives of how I look, despite the pretty drastic changes.

Sorry for turning this into a LiveJournal, but I'm just trying to process all that's going on recently. Again, I really appreciate all the kind words last week, and having a place to express what I'm going through, knowing that many of you will likely understand.

tl;dr:
My scale is f*cked. Thoughts on the Fitbit Aria scale?

I love my aria scale because of the Wi-Fi syncing. I found that I was only recording my weight if I was happy with it so it helps keep me accountable. It seems very accurate to me as long as I'm weighing at the same time of day.

kaostheory wrote:

I continue to be annoyed with my scale. I weighed in Sunday at 205, today at 187 (wtf?!?!) and 223. It's definitely time for a new scale. I've been considering asking for the Fitbit Aria scale for Xmas, but I'm unsure what it does that is 2-5x better than a regular, non-wifi scale. Is the wifi just updating fitbit.com so I don't have to type the information in? If so, that hardly seems worth it. I'm open to any thoughts, comments, suggestions you all have. Iirc, at least a couple of you have the Aria scale, so I'd love to know if you think it's worth it.

I have the Aria and yes, basically, it just syncs up the data for you so you don't need to log manually. Keep in mind that it does also measure body fat %, so that markup doesn't look quite as exorbitant when you compare it to other body fat % scales.

Also keep in mind that the Aria can indirectly sync with other fitness apps if you're using them by linking Fitbit with the other thing (e.g. Lose It, MyFitnessPal, etc). It is important to keep your weight roughly accurate in a calorie counter, since your budget will drop along with your weight (stupid laws of thermodynamics...).

In my case, adding the Aria meant I started logging my weight every single day rather than every couple of weeks, because I had consistently slacked on the data entry when it was a manual process. This gives me much better insights into trends over time than I was getting with manual logging. If you have the discipline to manually record every day and don't mind doing so already then the Aria really won't change anything for you, though.

I'm also struggling to adjust the concept of my identity with the reality of my body. That sentence alone points out a core problem, which is that my identity has been largely tied to my body. Being the fat kid and then a fat adult has always been a large part of my identity. When I think about who and what I am, I can't help but have one of the first adjectives that comes to mind be weight-based and typically with a negative connotation. It's been so ingrained in me since Elementary or Middle school. When I look in the mirror, I can't help but focus on the negatives of how I look, despite the pretty drastic changes.

It's tough to shake and it speaks to an issue many people have with maintenance and "drifting" back up over time. I know I've yo-yod a few times in my life, and I always felt like the "normal" was to just let myself get fat again despite having been a healthy weight for a good chunk of the time. Breaking that cycle is difficult but a key to success. Now I try to define myself by how healthy I am and not fixate on weight specifically, even though that's an obvious component.

gore wrote:

It's tough to shake and it speaks to an issue many people have with maintenance and "drifting" back up over time. I know I've yo-yod a few times in my life, and I always felt like the "normal" was to just let myself get fat again despite having been a healthy weight for a good chunk of the time. Breaking that cycle is difficult but a key to success. Now I try to define myself by how healthy I am and not fixate on weight specifically, even though that's an obvious component.

I've said similar things about just "wanting to be healthy". When I was talking through last week's post with my wife, she asked the very valuable question of "what does it mean to be healthy?"

Is it a weight thing? A fitness thing? A food quality thing? An appearance thing?

If I'm being honest with myself, I've been too focused on appearance.

What follows in the spoiler text was disheartening to me, and I don't want to hit someone unprepared.

Spoiler:

Recently, wy wife shared a very moving video of someone who had lost a lot of weight trying to embrace his body with all of the excess skin and imperfections. It was awesome that he did it, and I'm super proud of him for having the courage, but it still hit me really hard. I don't think I've come to terms with the fact that, barring surgery, I'll always have physical reminders of my previous weight. I'll never look "normal". That's a really tough pill to swallow, and I'm still struggling to choke it down.

I've always felt different and an outsider because of my weight. I've always - as long as I can remember - been overweight. it has always been a defining characteristic. I fear that permanent reminders will continue to reinforce the idea that I'm different and not like "normal" people. I fear that no matter what I do it will never be "enough". What I'm really after isn't weight, fitness, health, or appearance. I'm really after happiness and no amount of healthy eating, exercise, or surgery is going to give me that.

I'm tagging back into this one. I completely blew it once summer hit and gained a bunch of my weight back. It seems that vowing to myself to never hit 300 lbs. again is a quick way to make sure I hit 300 lbs. again.

Unfortunately I don't know my precise weight at the moment because my roommate broke my scale. Until I get a new one, I'll have to go by how my belt, pants, and shirts feel.

Ugh... just had a check up and hit a new high number... 317... yeah I was fully dressed wearing steel toes and had my pockets full, but still... that's just depressing. I really need to get started working out.

kaostheory wrote:
gore wrote:

It's tough to shake and it speaks to an issue many people have with maintenance and "drifting" back up over time. I know I've yo-yod a few times in my life, and I always felt like the "normal" was to just let myself get fat again despite having been a healthy weight for a good chunk of the time. Breaking that cycle is difficult but a key to success. Now I try to define myself by how healthy I am and not fixate on weight specifically, even though that's an obvious component.

I've said similar things about just "wanting to be healthy". When I was talking through last week's post with my wife, she asked the very valuable question of "what does it mean to be healthy?"

Is it a weight thing? A fitness thing? A food quality thing? An appearance thing?

If I'm being honest with myself, I've been too focused on appearance.

I think of it this way: appearance is kind of a side effect of one's health, and a bit of vanity isn't so bad in that it gives us extra encouragement to get moving.

The tough part is to step back and look at the whole health picture, especially when it seems like you're near your goal and the most dramatic improvements from weight loss have already been achieved.

As important as it is, weight management is just one piece of the fitness puzzle; health is a life long commitment, not something you're ever "done" with. That's difficult to accept, and it's part of why it's so hard to maintain after losing weight.

Paleocon wrote:

Just thought I would share this with you folks.

I was at my gym before the Thanksgiving break and my trainer tells me "Paleo, I need you to join this 'maintain don't gain' program for the holidays. I don't have enough people signed up.".

So I ask her "well, how do you know I don't want to gain?"

Without missing a beat, she gave me a dismissive look and said "because you're fat".

"Sure thing trainer, I'll join your program if you join mine. It's call the "don't be a f*cking asshole for the holidays program". I don't have enough people signed up."

kaostheory wrote:

I've said similar things about just "wanting to be healthy". When I was talking through last week's post with my wife, she asked the very valuable question of "what does it mean to be healthy?"

Is it a weight thing? A fitness thing? A food quality thing? An appearance thing?

If I'm being honest with myself, I've been too focused on appearance.

What follows in the spoiler text was disheartening to me, and I don't want to hit someone unprepared.

Spoiler:

Recently, wy wife shared a very moving video of someone who had lost a lot of weight trying to embrace his body with all of the excess skin and imperfections. It was awesome that he did it, and I'm super proud of him for having the courage, but it still hit me really hard. I don't think I've come to terms with the fact that, barring surgery, I'll always have physical reminders of my previous weight. I'll never look "normal". That's a really tough pill to swallow, and I'm still struggling to choke it down.

I've always felt different and an outsider because of my weight. I've always - as long as I can remember - been overweight. it has always been a defining characteristic. I fear that permanent reminders will continue to reinforce the idea that I'm different and not like "normal" people. I fear that no matter what I do it will never be "enough". What I'm really after isn't weight, fitness, health, or appearance. I'm really after happiness and no amount of healthy eating, exercise, or surgery is going to give me that.

My power response to this?

f*ck normal.

Normal is a statistical artifact that is irrelevant to a single data point. No-one is normal, except for that one individual who is at the exact peak of the bell-curve. Every other single person is different. Embrace the different, it what makes you distinct from everyone else. Different is the essence of identity.

And I love the last line you wrote there. Happiness is your goal. Not a number on the scale or how you look in a Speedo. That's an excellent target to shoot for, albeit a difficult one to figure out how to aim at.

Actually, even that guy who's perfectly normal is a weirdo. No one falls exactly on that point in all parameters. When someone does, that's really, really weird.

Jonman wrote:
kaostheory wrote:

I've said similar things about just "wanting to be healthy". When I was talking through last week's post with my wife, she asked the very valuable question of "what does it mean to be healthy?"

Is it a weight thing? A fitness thing? A food quality thing? An appearance thing?

If I'm being honest with myself, I've been too focused on appearance.

What follows in the spoiler text was disheartening to me, and I don't want to hit someone unprepared.

Spoiler:

Recently, wy wife shared a very moving video of someone who had lost a lot of weight trying to embrace his body with all of the excess skin and imperfections. It was awesome that he did it, and I'm super proud of him for having the courage, but it still hit me really hard. I don't think I've come to terms with the fact that, barring surgery, I'll always have physical reminders of my previous weight. I'll never look "normal". That's a really tough pill to swallow, and I'm still struggling to choke it down.

I've always felt different and an outsider because of my weight. I've always - as long as I can remember - been overweight. it has always been a defining characteristic. I fear that permanent reminders will continue to reinforce the idea that I'm different and not like "normal" people. I fear that no matter what I do it will never be "enough". What I'm really after isn't weight, fitness, health, or appearance. I'm really after happiness and no amount of healthy eating, exercise, or surgery is going to give me that.

My power response to this?

f*ck normal.

Normal is a statistical artifact that is irrelevant to a single data point. No-one is normal, except for that one individual who is at the exact peak of the bell-curve. Every other single person is different. Embrace the different, it what makes you distinct from everyone else. Different is the essence of identity.

And I love the last line you wrote there. Happiness is your goal. Not a number on the scale or how you look in a Speedo. That's an excellent target to shoot for, albeit a difficult one to figure out how to aim at.

That reminds me of the guy who was mugged every six or so seconds in New York. (With thanks to old Saturday Night Live.)

Starting Weight: 270 lbs (08/25/2012)
Current Weight: 190.5 lbs (12/13/2014)

Warning: Rant ahead.

Spoiler:

Unemployment has destroyed my discipline. Fortunately, I'm still keeping track of what I eat, but I can't cut hundreds of calories any more. I don't leave the house much because I'll end up spending money I shouldn't, and the holidays (combined with terrible weather) are making life far more miserable than it needs to be. (Thanks SAD.) My sleep pattern is erratic and I'm fed up with everything.

That said, I'm not struggling financially. I have a place to live, food to eat, and plenty of video games to play, but I still feel like complete garbage.

Yeah. I know how that's like. Ugh. It can be hard, but you have to maintain structure. Occupations and jobs give you structure that allow you to make sense of the day and your life. Without those, it can be easy to drift aimlessly and lose yourself. I used a 3-day workout schedule around which I reassembled my life after I got tossed out from my training hospital for the unforgivable sin of finishing my training.

I feel like I've been doing poorly since the scale started acting up. I don't have that objective third party to account to, and think I've regressed because of it.

Although, today at lunch, I found out a super awesome pizza placed that had closed reopened in a new location. My coworkers were all going, but instead I went to Panera and got something more sensible.

Edit: I felt even better about my decision when they got back and their single slice was 1/4 of a pizza.

Starting Weight (12/28/13): 295.0
Previous Weight (11/18/14): 212.2
Current Weight (12/19/14): 219.8
Change: +7.6
Target Weight: 195
Progress: 75.2 / 100

New scale arrived yesterday.

I'm not sure I could really trust my previous readings. Maybe I gained 7 pounds last month, maybe not. There was a part of me that was worried my scale was really off for a while, and I would step on to 230+ and actually have not really met my previous goal.

With next week being Xmas, I don't have high hopes for losing much, but after Xmas - maybe New Year's - I'll be back on track.