Fellow Child-free folk - Let's Chat: Do you feel it is risky being "out" these days?

DSGamer wrote:
imbiginjapan wrote:
Demosthenes wrote:

Buh. Pro-choice, but that is not great.

Same here.
I'm going to convince myself it means they can afford a lot of clothes.

Good point. They're family is two adults, two fabulous wardrobes.

maybe it's Stacy and Clinton from What Not to Put on Your Car

That 2012 Bundle Of Joy Will Cost You $241,080 To Raise [NPR]

Best retirement investment I've ever made.

I think it would be neat if international childfree day/non-parents day (August 1st) made a comeback. There's a small effort starting to revive it here, for example.

Dragonfly wrote:

I think it would be neat if international childfree day/non-parents day (August 1st) made a comeback. There's a small effort starting to revive it here, for example.

Sorry to have to ask, but is this parody?

She has stood up for her childfree lifestyle in the face of disapproving family members

If I ever had a blurb about myself somewhere I don't know if I would detail a time that I have stood up to disapproving family members. It happens allot, and not about children.

Dragonfly wrote:

I think it would be neat if international childfree day/non-parents day (August 1st) made a comeback. There's a small effort starting to revive it here, for example.

Why do we need a day when we have our own smug, self-satisfaction and buckets of money?

Quintin_Stone wrote:
Dragonfly wrote:

I think it would be neat if international childfree day/non-parents day (August 1st) made a comeback. There's a small effort starting to revive it here, for example.

Why do we need a day when we have our own smug, self-satisfaction and buckets of money? :D

Reposted for relevance:

IMAGE(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/family_decals.png)

PoderOmega wrote:

Sorry to have to ask, but is this parody?

I can't blame you for wondering. The site seems well-intentioned, but appears to need lots of work. ^_^; It is very much real, though, and was originally suggested in the 1970's by the National Alliance for Optional Parenthood.

Still, even with our abundant smug, our ongoing international, spontaneous vacations, loads of disposable income, and seemingly endless supply of martinis, I am just selfish enough to think a designated non-parents day could be fun. I'm evil that way.

Ranger Rick wrote:
Quintin_Stone wrote:
Dragonfly wrote:

I think it would be neat if international childfree day/non-parents day (August 1st) made a comeback. There's a small effort starting to revive it here, for example.

Why do we need a day when we have our own smug, self-satisfaction and buckets of money? :D

Reposted for relevance:

IMAGE(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/family_decals.png)

As long as we're gloating:

http://www.comedycentral.com/video-c...

Somewhat subpar embeddable Dr. Katz version:

Grant Achatz, owner of Alinea wrote:

Tbl brings 8mo.Old. It cries. Diners mad. Tell ppl no kids? Subject diners 2crying? Ppl take infants 2 plays? Concerts? Hate saying no,but..

Full story here:

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/4589263

I cannot imagine dropping 250+ dollars per person and having to endure a screaming child through the experience. Between this and the plethora of toddlers I've seen in dive bars lately (these places don't even serve food!) I'm strongly in favor of child free restaurants.

Seth wrote:
Grant Achatz, owner of Alinea wrote:

Tbl brings 8mo.Old. It cries. Diners mad. Tell ppl no kids? Subject diners 2crying? Ppl take infants 2 plays? Concerts? Hate saying no,but..

Full story here:

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/4589263

I cannot imagine dropping 250+ dollars per person and having to endure a screaming child through the experience. Between this and the plethora of toddlers I've seen in dive bars lately (these places don't even serve food!) I'm strongly in favor of child free restaurants.

I love the controversy here, though, as it almost strikes me as farce (though I know it isn't). One wonders who these parents are who dream of going out for a nice, fancy, loud dinner that are saying it is ridiculous that they shouldn't be allowed to bring their kids to a place like that.

Something tells me this thread will get ugly again quick though.

I completely support the right of businesses to ban small children, especially when they make it known and do so politely. Because you know who also hates interrupted romantic dinners or other adult-oriented events? Parents. On an occasion when they make time to spend outside of their demanding lives, nothing curdles the cheese faster than having to put up with other people's unsupervised and unruly kids. Or so I am informed by most good parents I'm friends with.

I would shamelessly pay more money to be on a childfree flight, and I try to give my business to those locations that have childfree policies. I even belong to a gym that's clearly geared towards seniors, and only occasionally allows children anywhere near the pool and never around the equipment. But I'm a big believer in the positive impact of quiet areas and peaceful environments. Adults need adult spaces, too.

Seth wrote:

I cannot imagine dropping 250+ dollars per person and having to endure a screaming child through the experience. Between this and the plethora of toddlers I've seen in dive bars lately (these places don't even serve food!) I'm strongly in favor of child free restaurants.

That's incredible. We only bring our kids to places where we think they're able to meet the expected level of behavior. And if for some reason we're wrong and they start acting up, we leave promptly. It's just common courtesy.

If I were running a high-end restaurant, I'd definitely have a clause on the menu to the effect of "we reserve the right to eject people who are disturbing other diners". As a contrast, I've been out to some nice places where children were present and they were behaving perfectly. I'd never have had our kids in that same situation, but if a kid can be calm and quiet I see no problem with them being present. Excepting bars and such anyway.

Dragonfly wrote:

Because you know who also hates interrupted romantic dinners or other adult-oriented events? Parents. On an occasion when they make time to spend outside of their demanding lives, nothing curdles the cheese faster than having to put up with other people's unsupervised and unruly kids.

Heck yes. Just because I have kids of my own doesn't mean I want to be around families where the kids are acting up. That's true even if it's a family night out with my kids present. I might be able to endure the fuss better than someone without kids because I'm more used to it, but that doesn't mean I feel any less irritated for being subject to it.

Anecdotally, we took our kids to a local Nutcracker ballet over the holidays. Even though the Nutcracker is pretty much intended for families, we got seats on the outside of a section nearest the door, and as soon as my son told me he was bored I took him outside. It's harder when you're a single parent with multiple kids in tow, but then you just have to prepare them all for the possibility that everyone may have to leave just because one of the kids isn't behaving. It's hard to avoid someone getting upset in that case, but what can you do. At least they're getting upset outside the venue and not bothering anyone.

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

DSGamer wrote:

Yeah. I'm not sure why this is ever controversial. I've walked into restaurants and then promptly left when I realized they had a dress code and I wasn't prepared. I've also bought a suit jacket specifically for a restaurant. I tthink this is similar. Respect other people and their right to a good experience.

See, dress code... that is the point where it feels snobbish to me, and I'm likely to avoid a place... as I don't see how me being in a button-up shirt, and not a suit jacket is somehow going to ruin the mood. Pay attention to your food and company. That's something that seems much easier to ignore in other people than a screaming child or some in a restaurant who is clearly ill and probably shouldn't be out in public anyway.

Yeah. I'm not sure why this is ever controversial. I've walked into restaurants and then promptly left when I realized they had a dress code and I wasn't prepared. I've also bought a suit jacket specifically for a restaurant. I think this is similar. Respect other people and their right to a good experience.

Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Demosthenes wrote:
DSGamer wrote:

Yeah. I'm not sure why this is ever controversial. I've walked into restaurants and then promptly left when I realized they had a dress code and I wasn't prepared. I've also bought a suit jacket specifically for a restaurant. I tthink this is similar. Respect other people and their right to a good experience.

See, dress code... that is the point where it feels snobbish to me, and I'm likely to avoid a place... as I don't see how me being in a button-up shirt, and not a suit jacket is somehow going to ruin the mood. Pay attention to your food and company. That's something that seems much easier to ignore in other people than a screaming child or some in a restaurant who is clearly ill and probably shouldn't be out in public anyway.

I largely agree that in many cases it's silly, but I don't agree that people don't have the right to that opinion. My wife happens to be one of those people who every once in a while wants to get dressed up and go out. I could make an argument why it's silly or respect her right to that opinion and just put a jacket on.

Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Yup. I had a screaming baby and multiple toddlers running up and down the aisles for Catching Fire, a popular children's film where children murder other children. Our children were with their auntie.

+1 to private venues setting whatever expectations they like. -1 from my inner cynic that realizes the ushers do jack+squat to enforce existing rules around people using their cell phones or talking at full volume.

Seems like a no-brainer. Most parents would never bring a baby to an expensive restaurant, so a rule to exclude them for the few that think it is a good idea makes sense.

To be honest, I can't remember a single time when a child ruined a dining, film, or travel experience for my wife and I. We have a few friends with babies and toddlers, and that has just meant babysitting opportunities for our daughter, as they don't bring their kids to restaurants and bars. It's actually not fun for the parent 99% of the time.

+1 to private venues setting whatever expectations they like. -1 from my inner cynic that realizes the ushers do jack+squat to enforce existing rules around people using their cell phones or talking at full volume.

I actually said something about this in the gun control thread, of all places, based on a video commercial posted by someone. The issue with ushers/most of the movie theater employees at the theaters I frequent are simply unable to risk their jobs trying to enforce policies. Having briefly worked as an usher and having sat for a 20 minute meeting on why my telling someone to turn off their cell phone was inappropriate... it's like being a male teacher and having to talk to a female student about dress code, there's no scenario in which you are going to win unless it's at an establishment that is committed to those rules.

Tanglebones wrote:
Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Or me to The Deer Hunter at 1. What the sh*t?

Bonus_Eruptus wrote:
Tanglebones wrote:
Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Or me to The Deer Hunter at 1. What the sh*t?

You're just too good to be true..

Jayhawker wrote:

Seems like a no-brainer. Most parents would never bring a baby to an expensive restaurant, so a rule to exclude them for the few that think it is a good idea makes sense.

To be honest, I can't remember a single time when a child ruined a dining, film, or travel experience for my wife and I. We have a few friends with babies and toddlers, and that has just meant babysitting opportunities for our daughter, as they don't bring their kids to restaurants and bars. It's actually not fun for the parent 99% of the time.

This is all anecdotal, though. And maybe it depends partly on whether or not you're used to kids. I've been in many situations where a child ruined the experience. My favorite (and by favorite I mean the craziest example) was when I saw the first Captain America. There were 3 kids literally running around the theater. Running in front of the screen. Running down the aisles. Occasionally a parent would get up, tell them to stop and then go sit down. This continued for 30, 40 minutes and finally I went to get an usher. The usher asked them to chill the kids and they yelled at the usher. Eventually the usher prevailed and one of the adults left (not sure how that solved it). 15 minutes later the kids are running around like crazy. Someone else goes out to get an usher. He comes back and asks them to leave. Finally they all leave, the audience claps and by that point the movie is almost over.

Tanglebones wrote:
Bonus_Eruptus wrote:
Tanglebones wrote:
Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Or me to The Deer Hunter at 1. What the sh*t?

You're just too good to be true..

Yeah. I was going to chime in with seeing Gremlins at 8. I watched that movie facing backwards with my hands over my ears. It freaked me out that badly. But nothing I can think of tops Deer Hunter at 1.

DSGamer wrote:
Tanglebones wrote:
Bonus_Eruptus wrote:
Tanglebones wrote:
Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Or me to The Deer Hunter at 1. What the sh*t?

You're just too good to be true..

Yeah. I was going to chime in with seeing Gremlins at 8. I watched that movie facing backwards with my hands over my ears. It freaked me out that badly. But nothing I can think of tops Deer Hunter at 1.

Well, you don't remember anything at the age of 1 anyway, right?

Tanglebones wrote:

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

This explains so much...

Demosthenes wrote:

it's like being a male teacher and having to talk to a female student about dress code, there's no scenario in which you are going to win unless it's at an establishment that is committed to those rules.

My wife is a high school teacher and, because she was also the coach of the cheerleading team, the go-to teacher when male teachers needed to make a comment on female students being inappropriately dressed.

Bonus_Eruptus wrote:
Tanglebones wrote:
Nevin73 wrote:

Or the parent who thinks it is a good idea to bring his 4 y/o to LotR. All he ended up doing was ruining his experience, my experience, and probably damaging his kid for life.

Nah.. my parents bringing me to Aliens at 5 - *that's* ruining me for life

Or me to The Deer Hunter at 1. What the sh*t?

Less bad: my parents taking my sister to see Ghostbusters at the age of four or five - and her screaming the place down at the sight of the Stay Puft marshmallow man.

Of course, my parents also took me to see American Werewolf in London at age 6 or so at a drive-in, so their sense of appropriate wasn't exactly well-honed anyway.

Everytime I hear about babies in bars, this is what I think of:

(apologies for the terrible quality - it wasn't me)

I saw Ghostbusters at a very young age and it started me on an obsession. By age 7 or 8, I had my own jump suit, proton pack, ghost trap, Fire House playset, Ecto 1-A, action figures, and plenty of "Ectoplasm."