lunabean

After a large, chainsaw wielding man carves you in half in Gears of War, you don't expect the female voice talking trash in your ear. Especially one with such a filthy mouth -- if the Zombie Skate stories are to be believed. Lunabean is a mystery, underneath her love for animals and questionable choice in men seethes the fury of a thousand angry wasps, aching to unleash vengeance on the unsuspecting masses. Here's to lunabean, she hearts brains.

IMAGE(http://www.gamerswithjobs.com/files/images/lunabean.jpg)

As far as I know, that's a real bird and it's very, very happy.

Who the devil are you?

Hello! My name is Emmy. I'm 25 years young and I live in California. I'm a science nerd but you wouldn't know unless you bring up microorganisms or intestinal parasites. I have a strange sense of humor and I try not to take life too seriously. I procrastinate often except when it comes to my taxes; I love doing my taxes.

What are you supposed to be doing during the day when you're reading GWJ?

Studying, mostly. I'm a Vet Tech student. It's equivalent to being a nurse but for animals. I run my own pet sitting service and I will be working in a small animal hospital after this semester ends.

How about family? Kids? Pets? Particularly meaningful inanimate objects?

I'm not very fond of the idea of having kids. Sorry, mom!

I have a three year old cockatiel named Pepper. He's my only child and he's very spoiled. Owning a bird is basically like having a perpetual 3 year old in the house. I'd like to adopt some more birds but that will have to wait until we've moved into a house and have the space.

As for meaningful inanimate objects, I'm very proud of the costumes I've made (Yuna from Final Fantasy 10, Jill Valentine from Resident Evil, and Columbia from Rocky Horror Picture Show). I also own some very rare vinyl records that took me years to find.

What was your favorite game over the last year or so? Why?

If I have to pick just one, I guess I'll go with Gears of War. It's certainly my most played game of the year. Co-op story mode is perfect and the multiplayer is so much fun to play with goodjers.

Which game are you looking forward to most?

I can't choose just one! Halo 3, Animal Crossing for the Wii, DDR Universe and Super Paper Mario are a few that come to mind.

What is your fondest gaming memory?

Playing Guitar Freaks/DrumMania with my BFF Kara. I was on drums and she was playing guitar. She had the official DrumMania controller but not the Guitar Freaks controller, so I brought my Guitar Hero controller over. Guitar Freaks only uses three buttons so we assumed it'd be easy to go into the settings and make it work. It was not. It took us nearly an hour to get the Guitar Hero controller to work with the game, and even then it still didn't work perfectly. However, it didn't matter; we had fun pretending we were rockstars.

Finally, why do you play games at all? Why haven't you outgrown them?

Outgrow them? Are you implying video games are for kids? If so, then that's okay because I'm a kid at heart. I don't want to grow up! Seriously though, I play games because they are fun. I like having fun.

Thanks for taking the time to answer our hard hitting questions! Any last words?

My only regret ... is that I have bonitis.

Comments

1. Bonitis
7 up, 7 down

An erection. Usually used in conjunction with "a wicked case of". Originally from an episode of Futurama, it has been adapted in such a way to describe one's own wood.

Did you see how short that girl's skirt was? Damn, she gave me a wicked case of bonitis.

Employee Profiles: Back from the grave!

Seriously, it's been a really, really long time since I've seen one of these. Like one year and four days.

If you'd like to get technical, the guy in Futurama should have said "osteitis." The correct medical terms for bone are oste/o and os (which also means mouth). In short, I do not have an erection.

lunabean wrote:

In short, I do not have an erection.

That's too bad.

YAY! More employee profiles! Been to damn long.

So are you on the right?

EDIT: Not one mention of being married! BUSTED! I'll send that 5 bucks I owe you directly to zero.

So you're not married? Well, hello there...

She didn't mention Zero to protect him from battlefield retribution when Schmoona caps one of our asses. Too bad for her that I do know she's married and do kill her husband, passive aggressively, on a regular basis.

Hooray for the return of employee profiles!

Luna is quickly becoming my nemesis. In Gears showdowns she always gets the first bullet in me as well as the last. I've tried to deal with this by fleeing and screaming like a four year old girl. It's at that point when my wife tells me to "stop running away like a giant... " (hint: rhymes with boondang).

The only revenge I can attempt is in another game. In Zombie Skate I'm convinced that if I run directly at her and chant, "Die, die, die..." the proximity voice will paralyze her in fear, thus allowing someone else to kill her (not me because clearly my weapons aren't made of schmoona-kryptonite). I'll let you all know how that turns out.

souldaddy wrote:

So are you on the right?

EDIT: Not one mention of being married! BUSTED! I'll send that 5 bucks I owe you directly to zero.

There was tangential mention of me:

I'd like to adopt some more birds but that will have to wait until we've moved into a house and have the space.

And Certis made a stab at my character:

Lunabean is a mystery, underneath her love for animals and questionable choice in men...

So I feel well enough represented.

Demiurge wrote:
lunabean wrote:

In short, I do not have an erection.

That's too bad.

You know, strangely enough I'm okay with it.

She looks proper mad.

1Dgaf wrote:

She looks proper mad.

I was thinking that was a still shot from the most hilarious rap video that could ever be.

A filthy mouth indeed... She's even flipping us the bird!

You confirm one female gamer and look what happens... front page news.

Just kidding. Lunabean kicks butt in GoW. If i remember correctly, she likes to get up close to her enemy and greet them with a frag grenade, only to roll away in anticipation of the pretty explosion of innards.

Great! Keep 'em employee profiles coming!

The only time I remember playing GoW with Luna, she was actually pretty quiet.

As I remember that was the session in which my offensiveness and wanton TKs shocked SoulDaddy, though.

I'm shocked! I didn't hear anything untoward in the language on Saturday... Might not have been audible over all the laughter ....

too much laughter....

wordsmythe wrote:

The only time I remember playing GoW with Luna, she was actually pretty quiet.

Like Terminator X, she speaks with her hands. And those hands say things like "Bang! You're dead! ROFLCOPTERBBQ!"

Fedaykin98 wrote:

Like Terminator X, she speaks with her hands.

Nice ref, Fed. Fight the Power!

momgamer wrote:

I'm shocked! I didn't hear anything untoward in the language on Saturday... Might not have been audible over all the laughter ....

too much laughter.... ;)

She's just a bit shy and often leaves her mic muted. More often than not you will hear her questioning the virtue of your parentage over my mic.

I'm in the same boat. And it was you guys who were laughing. She was just hurting us all!

I need a t-shirt that reads something like "Schmoona kicked my a$$ up one side and down the other and all I got was this stupid t-shirt!"

momgamer wrote:

I need a t-shirt that reads something like "Schmoona kicked my a$$ up one side and down the other and all I got was this stupid t-shirt!"

We ALL need that shirt, mom.

First CGOTW and now the return of Employee Profiles (and with such a fine member). I approve.

All this GoW talk makes me want to play right now.

Fedaykin98 wrote:
momgamer wrote:

I need a t-shirt that reads something like "Schmoona kicked my a$$ up one side and down the other and all I got was this stupid t-shirt!"

We ALL need that shirt, mom.

Hey, some of us take pleasure in trying to whale on Schmoona. It's not my fault I don't have GOW.

Oh wait, yes it is.

zeroKFE wrote:

More often than not you will hear her questioning the virtue of your parentage over my mic. ;)

I live for those moments.

Once again, zero shows his value as a man of immense worth, charm, and wit. And lunabean shows her good taste in men.

*licks Zero*

Hmmm...

Tease.