Thanks all around to those of you who submitted articles for our January Call For Writers. Following this morning's deadline, I opened up a number of the articles that had been filling my in-box over the past few weeks and casually browsed the first paragraph of a half-dozen or so entries. While I'll give them all a complete read in the long run, any good editor, a title I do not necessarily claim, knows that the first paragraph is often as good an indication as any of the overall quality of the work. If I don't want to keep reading at the end of the first paragraph, then probably our readers won't either, goes the ham-fisted logic. After reading seven or eight first paragraphs I realized I had a terrible if not impossible decision to make soon. These are good articles you've sent me, folks. Damn fine submissions from which I could probably populate the site with ten new writers of high-quality if I wanted.
We never like to introduce more than a couple new faces at any given time, so, as I said, I have a near insurmountable task before me. Thanks go to everyone daring enough to submit themselves to our Call! We will be going over the entries over the next several days.
Comments
I like the phrase "ham fisted." I may overuse it. Also, it makes me hungry.
Way to go, you Goodjers more daring than I!
Words... are a big deal.
Jill Lapore wrote:Editing is one of the great inventions of civilization.
I was gonna submit! but unfortunately, I installed Burning Crusade.
A hyena in Thousand Needles ate my homework?
*Goes back to read his first paragraph*
Oh dear.
Quoted for Truth with a capital 'T'.
Maybe this issue is best debated amongst the people who need to get off my lawn. - JoeBedurndurn
Steam: Momgamer
Wow, I managed to completely miss the Call. Bummer.
Steam: Varigear (playername Viibl)
Good luck to everyone that submitted. Hopefully your first paragraphs were enough
Backloggery | Origin: VrikkGWJ
"There's no constitutional amendment that says a golden retreiver CAN'T be Speaker of the House! 'AIR BUD 6: HOUSE BROKEN'" - TheHarpoMarxist
Mmm, ham fisted with butter fingers.
Steam: Varigear (playername Viibl)
What counts as a first paragraph in a dirty limerick?
Learn to swim.
Ok, I really need to go to lunch.
Words... are a big deal.
Jill Lapore wrote:Editing is one of the great inventions of civilization.
"There once was a man from Nantucket"
ClockworkHouse: He means the comic The Dark Knight Returns, where Batman and Superman get in a fistfight over Gotham. Not The Dark Knight Rises, where Batman and a loudly farting orchestra get in a fistfight over your attention.
Well, sh*t. In the spirit of brevity, I skipped the first paragraph.
And every paragraph after that.
I ended up getting a ham sandwich for lunch. I hope you're happy.
Words... are a big deal.
Jill Lapore wrote:Editing is one of the great inventions of civilization.
...or if you're a real master and can do limericks as a form of stanza in a larger work, just use that first one.
Do we have a limerick slam thread around here?
Maybe this issue is best debated amongst the people who need to get off my lawn. - JoeBedurndurn
Steam: Momgamer
Slam poetry is evil.
(So long as I'm sober.)
Words... are a big deal.
Jill Lapore wrote:Editing is one of the great inventions of civilization.
wordsmythe likes to rave and to rant,
Be dependent he really just can't,
On his own two big feet,
He's an island complete.
He just can't put on any pants!
Maybe this issue is best debated amongst the people who need to get off my lawn. - JoeBedurndurn
Steam: Momgamer
Does this count?
Friday fun with limericks
"Don't try to change me, babe."
Words... are a big deal.
Jill Lapore wrote:Editing is one of the great inventions of civilization.
That's exactly what I was talking about. But that was in 2004!
Anyone up for another to while away the time until the announcement?
Maybe this issue is best debated amongst the people who need to get off my lawn. - JoeBedurndurn
Steam: Momgamer
Ah, I remember the first paragraph of my submission.
"I know where she is. If you don't bring me on board, the envelope will be mailed..."
Something like that.
Last.fm | Twitter
"If I knew you could claim podcast hosts that way, I would had peed on you back at Tamo." - AgentWred
I'll probably submit something in a possible future Call. I just couldn't think of anything this time around.
"And now I'm off home to my castle for tea, biscuits and wenches. Tally ho!" - Jonman
"Dhelor + intarwebs = Great ideas." - wordsmythe
My tip for the week will probably be 'don't write an article at 2am in the morning in a war zone, send it off, and then forget to go back, re-read and edit that first paragraph' - lol
Just a tip from your uncle earl!
At least it's original, I bastardized a Francis Ford Coppola script.
Property of the Bensonhoist Lesbian Choir of Ground Zero, Brooklyn