This is Not the Boogle Memorial Dating Advice/Tips Thread, No

It was certainly a nice first step back. I'm amenable to seeing where it goes.

Some context: It's been a while since I've been single. 2.5 years ago I transitioned a friendship into a relationship, and that was like a 5 month process. Immediately before then I was in a relationship for 9 months. I guess that puts me at almost 4 years since I was last really single.

I was at a party on Saturday night where I knew 4 people of the 25 or so who were there throughout the night. I thought I was hitting it off well with one lady I met for the first time. Sunday afternon I sent her a Friend Request on Facebook *. I saw she accepted my friend request pretty quickly and got pretty excited. Then her profile became accessible and I quickly realized a crippling detail. She's married to another lady.

I'm bad at being single. 4 years ago it was unfathomable to me that a woman about my age would be married. I probably would have been just as poor at determining her sexual orientation then, but I guess it's a sign of hurdles I'll need to overcome. I also need to start checking that ring-finger.

*Didn't feel like that was creeping as the party invitation was through Facebook and it only took like 3 clicks to find her.

That's pretty awesome. If you're not laughing yet, just wait. You will.

Ever hear the Weezer song "Pink Triangle"? That's your soundtrack for today.

Threesome!

I don't share your optimism Q-Stone. I'll go listen to Pink Triangle when I get home from work today. I may have heard it before, I like Weezer but don't own and know much of their discography.

It's on Pinkerton, which is probably their best album. I highly recommend it. The song itself is actually one of the weaker cuts, but it's your experience exactly.

Is she married to a friend on Facebook in status only for laughs or did you see pictures of her and her wife on their wedding day?

Squee9 wrote:

Is she married to a friend on Facebook in status only for laughs or did you see pictures of her and her wife on their wedding day?

Prominent ring photos on Facebook, relationship status hidden, prominent partner pictures on Facebook, lots of links to articles about same sex marriage. Didn't see any actual wedding pictures though.

Sorry, Solidarity. That is pretty funny. You'll get better with practice.

S0LIDARITY wrote:
Squee9 wrote:

Is she married to a friend on Facebook in status only for laughs or did you see pictures of her and her wife on their wedding day?

Prominent ring photos on Facebook, relationship status hidden, prominent partner pictures on Facebook, lots of links to articles about same sex marriage. Didn't see any actual wedding pictures though.

Hm. Seems legit. :D. Better luck next time. Although female friends can be super handy for single men, regardless of sexual preference.

Queer women often have Bi friends, just sayin'

I agree about my encounter being a funny story, I plan on sharing my amusing endeavors.

I have never had a female 'wingman,' but right now all of my closest friends are women.

I also tried chatting up a seemingly easy lady after she insisted that she and I toast to 'good sex' before a round of flip-cup. She ended up forgetting my name, and ended up all over a tall, handsome, blonde guy before I met the other lady of interest.

Pinkerton is such a good album. Enjoy it! Discovering that album can be your consolation prize.

*begins listening to Pinkerton*

Edit: Ha, Pinkerton seems like the soundtrack to this thread. For me personally, Why Bother is the song for me. I think I really gave up on dating about 5 years ago. I've half tried a few times since then, but it's just not worth it to me anymore. I'm plenty happy being single and would rather things stay that way. Yeah -- why bother?

Whatever man, barking up the wrong tree happens.

The lesson to take away from this is only friend someone if you intend to hang out with them again regardless of relationship status.

That, or if you're the sort of person that just loves hording friends on Facebook.

@Fedaykin98, I wouldn't go so far as to say that I already saw myself marrying her, but the Pink Triangle was appropriate. (I just got home).

@ccesarano, I would still hang out with this girl platonically, but my initiative to do so has been drastically reduced. Hard for me to make that judgment when I meet someone while half-drunk too.

Double-Post. I could expand everyone's view into my love-life, but I'll save that for when it's a slow day at work. Not when I need to catch up on HIMYM.

HIMYM! Ted is such a p***y. Just like I was.

S0LIDARITY wrote:

Amusing story

Heh, I've had similar things happen once or twice in the past. I think it's because a girl will be a lot more relaxed and chatty when she's not thinking of you in a remotely sexual context - not just not interested, but not even crossed her mind. It's similar to the way that you'll generally be a bit more relaxed talking to someone of the same sex (assuming you're straight, of course).

Fedaykin98 wrote:

HIMYM! Ted is such a p***y. Just like I was. :oops:

A friend of mine jokingly gave me a copy of the Bro Code a couple of years back because of how much a friend of mine and I reminded her of Barney and Ted.

I've always felt that Ted is good at making terrible decisions. I'm not sure I ever looked at Ted and thought
IMAGE(http://i.lv3.hbo.com/assets/images/series/the-sopranos/character/big-p*ssy-1024.jpg)
but I slow-play everything when it comes to starting things up.

Sonicator wrote:

A friend of mine jokingly gave me a copy of the Bro Code a couple of years back because of how much a friend of mine and I reminded her of Barney and Ted. :-)

Which one were you?

Must be Ted. I think Mex is the only Barney on GWJ.

Fedaykin98 wrote:

Must be Ted. I think Mex is the only Barney on GWJ.

Would Barney take offense to that, or would Mex?

I think they would just bro-five.

Update on my sitch:

Y'all may remember that I posted that Lonely Island song a few pages back. Still seeing the same woman, things still going very well. Not to get too much into TMI territory, but she is incredibly into me sexually. I get it when, where, and how I want it. It's a new experience for me and one I intend to enjoy.

On Sunday she visibly mustered up her courage and told me that she wasn't interested in seeing other people. She said she'd been on a few first dates since meeting me and it was starting to get frustrating meeting other guys who were totally nice and charming on paper, and feeling them get instantly friendzone'd in her mind because all she could think about was the next time she gets to see me. She said she likes me and wants to see where this goes. I told her I heard what she was saying and appreciated her telling me this, and I wanted to sleep on it and digest it a little before I said anything in response.

I thought about the reason that I was dating at this stage, approximately four months out of a nine-year LTR. My plan had been to play the field for a while, see what was out there, and get more comfortable in my own skin for at least a year before looking for anything serious. I decided that was still the best plan for me right now.

Yesterday we went to brunch and I told her that if she thought that not seeing other people was the best thing for her to do right now, that was her decision, but I wouldn't be being honest with her if I implied that I was doing the same thing. I told her that I liked her and enjoyed spending time with her and obviously the sex is amazing, but the best thing for me right now is to keep it casual and I wanted to make sure she understood that if we're going to keep seeing each other. (She knows that I'm kind of on the rebound.)

I started to launch into some "it's-not-you-it's-me, you're-an-amazing-girl" speech, and she stopped me and said, "That's fine, don't overthink it. You're still going to give me that good dick, right?" (She's got a vulgar streak a mile wide, one of her many charms.) I told her, just try and stop me. She said, "Well, that's all right then. The rest is negotiable."

Boom-shaka-laka.

For Boogle?

Fedaykin98 wrote:

I think they would just bro-five.

Followed by Purell for both parties.

Holy crap, this list

http://www.ranker.com/list/the-13-se...

It could always be worse, guys!

Polliwog wrote:
Sonicator wrote:

A friend of mine jokingly gave me a copy of the Bro Code a couple of years back because of how much a friend of mine and I reminded her of Barney and Ted. :-)

Which one were you? ;)

Definitely Ted. He essentially forced me to chat to more women in bars by doing the "Haaaaaaave you met Ted" thing if I didn't initiate conversations myself.

hbi2k wrote:

Boom-shaka-laka.

Your newsletter. I want to subscribe to it.

I think it was very brave/cool that you were able to know where your head is in regarding your situation and how you knew yourself enough to be not ready to commit at this point in time. I doubt I would have the same amount of self-awareness if I was in your shoes.

I say give it another few months, and if she's still around and not going anywhere else, you might want to re-evaluate your timeframe.