That which has been seen/Vasectomy Snip-all

MrDeVil909 wrote:

You have a daily dick quotient? Talk about being prepared for anything!

It's total number of human dicks seen in the day, minus the times I see my own. That number may not exceed the total surface area (in centimeters square) of breasts seen in the same 24 hour period.

I thought it was fairly obvious.

H to the ickle wrote:
MrDeVil909 wrote:

You have a daily dick quotient? Talk about being prepared for anything!

It's total number of human dicks seen in the day, minus the times I see my own. That number may not exceed the total surface area (in centimeters square) of breasts seen in the same 24 hour period.

I thought it was fairly obvious.

Do you realize your formula allows for you to see hundreds of penises for every pair of breasts?

H to the ickle wrote:
MrDeVil909 wrote:

You have a daily dick quotient? Talk about being prepared for anything!

It's total number of human dicks seen in the day, minus the times I see my own. That number may not exceed the total surface area (in centimeters square) of breasts seen in the same 24 hour period.

I thought it was fairly obvious.

I do not approve, mostly because of your poor wording of the first clause.

"total number of human dicks seen in a day, minus the times I see my own."

Every time you see your own dick the left side of the equation increases by one while the right side stays the same (except the first time you see your dick).

For every time you see your own dick, past the first one, you are now able to see another human dick "free of charge" so to speak.

Do not want.

Edit: Also, what Wordy said. Both clauses are not acceptable.

wordsmythe wrote:
H to the ickle wrote:
MrDeVil909 wrote:

You have a daily dick quotient? Talk about being prepared for anything!

It's total number of human dicks seen in the day, minus the times I see my own. That number may not exceed the total surface area (in centimeters square) of breasts seen in the same 24 hour period.

I thought it was fairly obvious.

Do you realize your formula allows for you to see hundreds of penises for every pair of breasts?

Don't tell him that. It's like making fun of the illiterate: you write it down, but don't say it. If there's a flaw in someone's formula, the kindest thing to do is let them fail hilariously.

V-O wrote:
Quintin_Stone wrote:
mudbunny wrote:

Yup. You were supposed to wake up in a bathtub of ice, with a note saying that you should call the doctor...

But it was a doctor that did it to me in the first place. At least his Craigslist ad said he was a doctor. "I'M A REAL DOCTOR!" it promised. Most licenses are written in crayon, right?

Was it Dr. Tran? I have it on good authority that he isn't even a real doctor.

Does this mean he won't be down at the mall giving out hot american dickings? I'm not sure I could take that level of disappointment right now.

I do realize that. I actually saw and infinite number of dicks the day that was initially posted.

Man up, that video isn't that bad.

Bonus_Eruptus wrote:
wordsmythe wrote:
H to the ickle wrote:
MrDeVil909 wrote:

You have a daily dick quotient? Talk about being prepared for anything!

It's total number of human dicks seen in the day, minus the times I see my own. That number may not exceed the total surface area (in centimeters square) of breasts seen in the same 24 hour period.

I thought it was fairly obvious.

Do you realize your formula allows for you to see hundreds of penises for every pair of breasts?

Don't tell him that. It's like making fun of the illiterate: you write it down, but don't say it. If there's a flaw in someone's formula, the kindest thing to do is let them fail hilariously.

In that case, Hickle better prepare for a lot of hilarious PMs.

So, apparently I've been pronouncing it wrong all this time. Watching Maury while "working from home" the other day, I learned from a Sinbad lookalike that it's "vicectomy", and even if your wife is a cheating, trifling ho who "saw the smoke coming out of his penis", you can still get her pregnant 9 years later.

As if I didn't have enough things to be paranoid about.

24 hours from now, the deed will be done.

Not nervous yet...

Not much, anyways.

Resist the urge to take the valium too early.

What's standard "seeing the boys off" procedure here? One last date with Rosie Palm? Or tellign the missus "It'll never be like this for him ever again, just one time for old time's sake."

Prederick wrote:

What's standard "seeing the boys off" procedure here? ... Or tellign the missus "It'll never be like this for him ever again, just one time for old time's sake."

This is a terrible idea, mostly because God has a sense of humour.

"noscalpel-noneedle-vasectomy_tech"

Odd, I have no desire to click a link containing this text.

KingGorilla wrote:

"noscalpel-noneedle-vasectomy_tech"

Odd, I have no desire to click a link containing this text.

There is a non-zero chance that it utilizes something like one of these:
IMAGE(http://mrsellars.com/mrblog/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/sheep-castrator.png)

and some of these:
IMAGE(http://goatsupplies.netfirms.com/ProductImages/Castrator_Bands_100.jpg)

It's bad enough to put those on calves when they're locked up. :p

Has anyone ever tasted prairie oysters?

mudbunny wrote:

Has anyone ever tasted prairie oysters?

Isn't that the traditional cuisine in Counterstrike and BF1942?

And it's done.

Total time in the Dr's office, 30 minutes.

3 minutes in the room getting ready.
8 minutes of surgery.
4 minutes after surgery.
15 minutes in the waiting room.

mudbunny wrote:

And it's done.

Total time in the Dr's office, 30 minutes.

3 minutes in the room getting ready.
8 minutes of surgery.
4 minutes after surgery.
15 minutes in the waiting room.

5 minutes for her to pick up the rented nurse's outfit? Also, congrats.

And a lifetime of no legacy.

8 hours of yelling "OW MY BALLS!"

Pics or it didn't.... wait, no. Nevermind, scratch that.

Sorry to dredge up this old thread. Wifey and I have a bad habit of looking crap up on the internet and being scared of doing anything, pretty much. So she's anti "the pill" and anti several other options. I'm anti-condom because... I'm anti-condom. So. I'm thinking it is time for the snip.

The fact that this thread is old is even better, really, because I get to ask this question: Have ANY of you that have had a vasectomy had ANY side effects whatsoever? If you would like to PM me because it is too personal to share forum-wide, PLEASE do so, you would be saving the sanity of a man on the edge. I'd like to know about such topics as "does it hurt to have sex" and "are there issues making sex happen from an erectile standpoint." I am honestly not interested at all in the weekend following surgery, I can man-up for a few days; I'm more interested in the long-term. I assume the dementia thing hasn't kicked in yet if that is true, and I'm reading several articles that basically say "LOL, that's not true that we know of, just get the snip." Mostly, what I would love to hear are stories of increased happiness and no pregnancies. So please let me know your story!

I have had absolutely 0 side effects since I got snipped. None whatsoever. Haven't noticed anything different in the making love to my wife department, except for more possibilities due to less preparation being required. No pain at all either.

dRailer wrote:

Sorry to dredge up this old thread. Wifey and I have a bad habit of looking crap up on the internet and being scared of doing anything, pretty much. So she's anti "the pill" and anti several other options. I'm anti-condom because... I'm anti-condom. So. I'm thinking it is time for the snip.

The fact that this thread is old is even better, really, because I get to ask this question: Have ANY of you that have had a vasectomy had ANY side effects whatsoever? If you would like to PM me because it is too personal to share forum-wide, PLEASE do so, you would be saving the sanity of a man on the edge. I'd like to know about such topics as "does it hurt to have sex" and "are there issues making sex happen from an erectile standpoint." I am honestly not interested at all in the weekend following surgery, I can man-up for a few days; I'm more interested in the long-term. I assume the dementia thing hasn't kicked in yet if that is true, and I'm reading several articles that basically say "LOL, that's not true that we know of, just get the snip." Mostly, what I would love to hear are stories of increased happiness and no pregnancies. So please let me know your story!

Been about a year since my snip, and no problems at all.

Oh yeah. For me, the doctor said that I needed to wait for 2 weeks before I could do anything. Any action earlier than that had a significantly increased risk of the surgery undoing itself. (Now, I suspect that he meant going from 0.001% to 0.01%, but still.)

dRailer wrote:

Sorry to dredge up this old thread. Wifey and I have a bad habit of looking crap up on the internet and being scared of doing anything, pretty much. So she's anti "the pill" and anti several other options. I'm anti-condom because... I'm anti-condom. So. I'm thinking it is time for the snip.

The fact that this thread is old is even better, really, because I get to ask this question: Have ANY of you that have had a vasectomy had ANY side effects whatsoever? If you would like to PM me because it is too personal to share forum-wide, PLEASE do so, you would be saving the sanity of a man on the edge. I'd like to know about such topics as "does it hurt to have sex" and "are there issues making sex happen from an erectile standpoint." I am honestly not interested at all in the weekend following surgery, I can man-up for a few days; I'm more interested in the long-term. I assume the dementia thing hasn't kicked in yet if that is true, and I'm reading several articles that basically say "LOL, that's not true that we know of, just get the snip." Mostly, what I would love to hear are stories of increased happiness and no pregnancies. So please let me know your story!

Spoilered so friends who don't want any details, even mild ones about frequency, won't have to live the thread title. Still sharing since it could be helpful to more folks than you.

Spoiler:

No pregnancies here and very active still. Multiple times a week and sometimes multiple times a day/night. This has been the case throughout 14 years of marriage and for the years prior. The only thing I've noticed is some soreness in my lower abdomen after hours of fun. It takes a marathon to make that happen, and the pain is mild. If I suffered from other side effects over the past few years since the snip, there's a good chance we'd have noticed.

Thanks for the title edit, making this easier for our fellow visitors to avoid should they so choose.

But mostly, thanks for the answers, guys... you're doing much to bolster my confidence to make this happen.