ianunderhill vs. cancer (RIP Nick)

Ditto (Seems to sum it up)

Also, it's amazing if you search google for "F*ck cancer t-shirt" how many hits you get. Surprisingly I would not suggest doing that search at work.

I propose a Kickstarter project for "Stab F*cking Cancer in the f*cking Face: The Videogame"

Aw man... this news, along with the fact that my dad had surgery last night, that found some cancer in his colon, makes me totally want to scream:

f*ck CANCER!

I'm sorry, MoonDragon. Let your dad know this thirty year old man in Chicago stands with him in opposition to this bowel-menace. You and yours have my condolences and best wishes.

There are lots of great support groups out there, in addition to GWJ. Check out Cancer Forums. Very knowledgeable, kind people there, and they've helped me out a lot in my own fight.

We're here for you, Ian.

Sorry to hear about your father, MoonDragon. We're here for you too.

^ What they all said.

Go kick its ass and we'll be here supporting you as best we can.

Hope you f*ck your cancer up for many long years to come.

You have my best wishes and positive vibes for your safe passage through this trial. The collective is pulling for you!

Well, the good news for now is that I got discharged from the hospital late this afternoon, so I'm home. A buddy of mine picked me up and we went for dinner at a favorite no-frills haunt in my previous neighborhood. I was pretty thrilled to eat non-hospital food, walk around a bit (though it's harder than I'd expected after so much time sitting and lying down), and feel the outside air on me, polluted Chicago air though it may be. I'm settling in for a night of mindless entertainment and chilling the hell out in my own bed. It's not remarkable, sure, but it's a pretty damned good place to be right now.

I'm eager for Tuesday's appointment, though. I can't imagine how badly I'm going to be wanting that battle plan by the time that day gets here.

I lost my 3 favouritest relatives to cancer. But I can't imagine who terrifying this would be living in a country where you could "not have medical insurance". Hit us up with you paypal details and I'll throw as much as I can in the pot.

Man, sh*t.

Here's some inspiration:

Winston Churchill wrote:

We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender

ianunderhill wrote:

I've been moved by the love and generosity here before, but being on the other end of it is unreal.

Isn't it?
We're all here for you, hun. Show that cancer who's boss!

Tanglebones wrote:

Man, sh*t.

Here's some inspiration:

Winston Churchill wrote:

We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender

Heh, I was going to put that very quote here.

Tanglebones wrote:

Man, sh*t.

Here's some inspiration:

if about cancer Winston Churchill would have wrote:

We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in the colon, we shall fight in the stomachs and breasts, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in all the vital organs, we shall defend our bodies, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight in the skin, we shall fight in the liver, we shall fight in the cervixes and in the testes, we shall fight in the brain; we shall never surrender

FTFY

Good luck, Ian.

Ah, Churchill. All up in my bowels.

So here are two observations from this morning:

-Man oh man, I have never been so glad to sleep in my own bed. Last night was just a treat, in a way I never thought a futon could be a treat.

-I think my delay in talking to my parents about all this was the right thing to do in the end. Being able to think a lot of aspects of this through was useful, and being able to kind of practice what I was going to say definitely helped. I first told my mom about it all yesterday morning while I was still in the hospital, when I'd actually known about my illness at least being cancer since Wednesday afternoon. As I've mentioned elsewhere, I don't have the easiest relationship with my parents. It's not as though there's animosity, it's just there are big gaps in understanding we've never really had occasion to work past. As I've spent time out in the world, I think I've gotten both decent at relating to other people, and really good at figuring out what my needs are at a given moment. Self-awareness and the kind of empathic hooks between people that make various social interactions gel aren't really what I'd list amongst my parents' strong suits.

What does that mean here? Well, I knew there'd be a lot of "we're devastated, our son has cancer!" sadness regardless, but I was concerned about their overall outlook on this getting kind of stuck there. They're not the kind of people to talk about how they're feeling with people they know, and they're definitely not the sort who would go out of their way to talk to a psych, counselor, or otherwise without some serious forceful prodding in that direction. If they're not getting their needs met in this whole process, any of their attempts to be supportive of me are just going to drain them, and ultimately, I can't be stuck watching them run themselves ragged and sort of frustrated-ly trying to push them to seek help, because I'm the one with the effing cancer - I've already got enough to deal with in the first place.

It was some real effort, but I did get them to first look at this as a) "a cancer" rather than "CANCER!", b) stressed the importance of taking this all one day at a time, because that's all we can do, and c) I think I got them receptive to the idea of talking to people about their needs. At my appointment on Tuesday, I'm going to be drilling the team not just for details about my disease and treatment, but what resources they might have for my folks to help cope with all this business. The clinic in question actually has what they refer to as "psych oncologists" who deal directly with those types of issues. I'm going to be querying their heads off about what kind of resources and support they can offer my parents since they're out of state and will likely only be able to physically be around now and again throughout this whole process. I'm sure they'll have something, as I can't imagine these circumstances being particularly unique to my case. I just hope my parents stay receptive to the idea of talking to professionals about all this, because otherwise I'm gonna lose my hair way before any treatment gets its claws into me.

Another "we'll see", but also another optimistic starting point. More to come, as always.

Might I recommend LiveStrong as a starting point for resources.

Tanglebones wrote:

Man, sh*t.

Here's some inspiration:

Winston Churchill wrote:

We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender

Short version:

Never give up, never surrender!

IMAGE(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J52DlLZLUCI/T9IfU6tstJI/AAAAAAAATlc/Y2iBMxmVeZc/s1600/never.gif)

I'm glad to hear you've got some good options for information and support both for you and your folks.

I hope the learning process starts to give you that battle plan you'll need.

ian, just wanted to throw in my support too, and give you a big (((((((hug)))))). You have a terrific attitude and your sense of humor will help get you through this and kick your cancer's ass. I'm glad you're going to be asking a lot of questions of your doctors, I know there are newer treatment programs that can be beneficial. Recently an acquaintance of mine opted for a newer regiment of chemo that did the job with a lot less side effects and in a shorter amount of time. I'm sorry I don't know the details (I will try to find out more about it and post here) but the point is, ask a lot of questions about treatment regiments. I'm sending you lots of love, and if I can help at all financially, I'm looking forward to you giving us that opportunity. I've recommended chipin as a good method, I'm sure there are others. I'm doubly moved by the generosity of GWJ, having been on the receiving end myself, all I can say on that subject is embrace it and let us help you ... go ahead and feel the love, it's real. Stay strong, and keep laughing.

MoonDragon, my same sentiments go out to you, and another big ((((((hug)))))). I hope your father kicks his cancer's ass too!

I have been seriously thinking about Chipin as the setup seems simple and doesn't involve a lot of extra fees on top of PayPal. The one thing that puts me off is that Chipin requires you to specify start and end times. Beyond feeling a bit weird about potentially running multiple Chipin campaigns ("Hey guys, I'm here to ask you for money...again!"), I'm not particularly sure how long of a campaign I should aim to run. I could set up something for multiple months, for instance, but then if something goes really wrong and I need funds raised available to me in, say, the beginning October, I'm going to be stuck if I set the end date of the campaign past that.

Any thoughts? By the way, if by some chance everything just goes swell all around and I somehow have more money donated than I would need, I would basically just bug GWJ management until they let me dump the surplus back into the site. Extremely unlikely scenario, I know, but just saying.

You can take out the funds anytime, you don't have to wait until the end of the campaign. But there is a $500 limit on transfers per month, now I can't remember if that's a paypal limit or a chipin limit. Maybe Hilary can clear that up.

*edit: that must be a paypal limit, Reading the ChipIn site reminded me that the money donated goes directly to your paypal account.

Okay, my ChipIn page is setup. You'll find it here. I feel a bit strange about the vagueness around this, but then, that's where I'm at with this whole business, so sooner is better than later, right?

Chipped in, good luck.

And please include US healthcare in a sideways-f*cking threesome with cancer.

Good luck with raising the necessary funds.

ian, this is crazy news and I wish you luck and strength, but I must say with statements like this

ianunderhill wrote:

Ah, Churchill. All up in my bowels.

you seem to have the best possible attitude to a tough situation.

"You've got a cancer, and this is crazy, but get its number and punch its face in."

[size=6]Sorry, had to be done. :>[/size]

Good thoughts your way man.

This is crazy. Best of luck to you, ian.

Sending good thoughts your way.

Chipped in. Keep up the great attitude while we keep sending the positive vibes.