2012/13 Soccer Thread

For my next attempt to influence the world of football.

"Lionel Messi, you really fancy playing for Man City. And you can't wait to try meat pie and chips, with proper gravy."

Speaking of Messi, he was in some weird all-star game on Fox Soccer today called the Mayan World Cup. It looked like a playground scrimmage except when he would break for the goal and dribble around multiple defenders. And then kick the ball right at the goal keeper.

Still, despite the half-heartedness of the whole game, there was some fantastic ball handling at times.

Upon reviewing my previous advice to van Marwijk, allow me to make another suggestion.

Take off Huntelaar and put a lamppost on. Same amount of movement, same ability to trap the ball, but the lamppost stays on its feet better. How a player who does so well in the Bundesliga can look so awful at this tournament is beyond me...though not beyond Robben, who is at it too.

Don't understand why Holland went so gung-ho once they'd scored...they needed a 2-0 result by the end of the game, not in the first 20 minutes. Bombing forward against a team with this much speed is suicidal, and van der Wiel and Willems are getting a right chasing. Through ball for the equaliser was a classic, Vlaar just switched off for a microsecond and Showpony was through.

Roke wrote:

Van Bommel is out for van der Vaart apparently so we'll get a look at what dave said they should do.

And good lord it's not pretty. Holland are damned lucky to go into the second half with 1-1.

During half time they counted how long Gomez had been in posession his 2 matches so far. They came to 24.35 seconds, for the 24 times he touched the ball. Longest one was 8 seconds during a counter run.

Wife watching some chick flick on our only TV, but I realized I could watch live on ESPN.com. Rooting for the Danes, no particular reason. Seems like Germany is favored.

Do other cultures (outside the US) tend to support the less favored side as well?

Portugal properly did for Holland then, and played in a very disciplined team fashion. As usual, the Dutch played like individuals who despise each other (and probably do), and offered nothing apart from a couple of VdV long shots, one of which went in and the other hit the post.

Portugal v Czechs and Greece v Germany - that's Portugal and Germany in the semis then.

Fedaykin98 wrote:

Do other cultures (outside the US) tend to support the less favored side as well?

Yep. That's pretty much universal human trait, I think.

Holland has been... I'm looking for adjectives and not coming up with anything grave enough.

Germans are not setting the world on fire, but they're still my favourites, on par with Spain. Another good team performance. And if we learned anything from the Dutch, it's the team that matters, first and foremost.

UCRC wrote:

Holland has been... I'm looking for adjectives and not coming up with anything grave enough.

..like Wolves, only less successful. There, that should do.

As NDJ said, for a lot of that team, Euro 2012 was probably the last go around - European teams rarely do well in South America, so Brazil 2014 would be a bit of a stretch as far as trophies go. I never knew that Sneijder and RVP hate each other (though they are both Dutch, so the odds were higher than normal..), apparently have done since they were in the Dutch youth systems.

Bet the plane ride back to their Polish base is a right bundle of laughs...

davet010 wrote:
UCRC wrote:

Holland has been... I'm looking for adjectives and not coming up with anything grave enough.

..like Wolves, only less successful. :)

That's damn near hate speech.

Nicky Bendtner has been suspended for a match and fined 100,000 euros for showing off his sponsored undies.

The Russian FA was fined $37,800 for "improper fan behavior".

EDIT: Ah, the $37,800 was in addition to another $150K fine. Still though.

That's part of what 150k was for:

Real charmers.

Question from a dumb American: According to ESPN, the current results hold Italy wins group C. How does that work? Italy and Spain would both have identical records and they tied each other. I thought the next tiebreaker was goal differential but Spain would be at +4 while Italy would only be at +1. How is Italy ahead of Croatia if they all end up with five points and Italy only has a +1 differential?

iaintgotnopants wrote:

Question from a dumb American: According to ESPN, the current results hold Italy wins group C. How does that work? Italy and Spain would both have identical records and they tied each other. I thought the next tiebreaker was goal differential but Spain would be at +4 while Italy would only be at +1. How is Italy ahead of Croatia if they all end up with five points and Italy only has a +1 differential?

Apparently, the decider goes to a calculated mini-league between the 3 involved teams, and Italy have scored one more goal.

No, I don't know which berk came up with it.

Considering the closeness of it all, these last two games have been garbage. I also can't believe how Spain are playing given that one Croatia goal sees Spain off home.

Jeesus, Busquets was lucky the ref didn't see him pull Corluka at that corner.

And Spain score...but with better finishing, this lot are beatable. How Piqué made this squad is difficult to fathom, for a big bloke he's soft as sh1te and has the positional sense of a jelly.

Yea spains 0 striker lets sit on this draw was perplexing. Croatia can't get a call either. Tough luck for the Croatians. Looked like they could of played spoiler if they could of got into the knock out stage.

Not quite sure what sweet, gentle Mario was trying to communicate to the coach (I assume), but I think his teammate did him a big favour.

davet010 wrote:

Not quite sure what sweet, gentle Mario was trying to communicate to the coach (I assume), but I think his teammate did him a big favour.

I think he was pointing to the entire crowd, as they were booing him when he came on the pitch.

dejanzie wrote:
davet010 wrote:

Not quite sure what sweet, gentle Mario was trying to communicate to the coach (I assume), but I think his teammate did him a big favour.

I think he was pointing to the entire crowd, as they were booing him when he came on the pitch.

Did them a lot of good then, didn't it. No wonder the Irish fans like getting pissed, you'd need to be hammered to pay money to watch a load of brownshoe cloggers from Premiership no-mark clubs play at the bottom of your road, let alone hundreds of miles from home.

That's why Roy Keane's remarks are so nonsensical (apart from the fact he's a dick, which is a given). What true talents are in that squad ? What talents could Trappatoni have taken to the tournament but chose not to ? This is not a golden generation of Irish footballers, and all Trap could do was to emphasise teamwork and spirit. Now anyone with an IQ over 80 (so not Roy) knows that while that might get you through qualification, when you are drawn in a group with 3 nations whose players mostly play in the world's top leagues, those qualities will not get you through to the next round without huge slices of luck. Ireland compounded their ordinariness by constantly making mistakes and giving away possession, and that's a killer at this level.

I'd love Keane to get the job, then play back his comments to him in 2 years time (assuming he's not run off again like a little girl as he's done at both his last 2 jobs...if I remember correctly, he resigned from Sunderland by texting Niall Quinn). See what he has to say for himself then.

davet010 wrote:

For my next attempt to influence the world of football.

"Lionel Messi, you really fancy playing for Man City. And you can't wait to try meat pie and chips, with proper gravy."

Really not so bad. During the 3 months I've spent in England, the best pie I've had was coincidentally in Manchester too. Indian food is definitely better in london though.

Verdickt is in: 80k fine for racism against Balotelli by Croatian fans. That were some expensive bananas, but still a 20% discount from showing a sponsor on your undies. I wonder how much they charge for racism against a black sponsor ...

dejanzie wrote:

Verdickt is in: 80k fine for racism against Balotelli by Croatian fans. That were some expensive bananas, but still a 20% discount from showing a sponsor on your undies. I wonder how much they charge for racism against a black sponsor ...

Just imagine how big the fine would have been if UEFA had an official bookmaking sponsor (I don't think they do at present, presumably because off-track bookmaking isn't legal in all countries). Bendtner would no doubt have had to make a video apology and advert for the UEFA bookmaker, before being ritually beheaded in the centre circle.

UEFA will never be serious about racism because there are no 'darkies' to give votes. FIFA is the best example of that - the African national associations vote for that Swiss tw8t, and he makes sure some splashes from the pork barrel go to them. He's not even arsed if it's 'diverted' into various pockets other than those who it is meant to aid.

Don't believe me ? Two words for you.

Jack Warner.

Good lord, England are only saved by one piece of good fortune. Ukraine are even more sh1te.

Wayne Rooney, world class ? At what, because it surely can't be football.

Midfield is about as flexible as a cast iron pan.

Ashley Young has broken the laws of mathematics. How can someone give away the ball more times than he has actually touched it ?

Bet Spain and Italy are putting together their elaborate game plans

"Pass ball to our own players, if lose ball wait ten seconds because England will pass it back, attack down left as Johnson is crap and Milner doesn't seem to be helping him, run at CB's, wind up that fat troll with the sh*t hair and he'll get a red card, bish-bash-bosh goals a plenty."

That was one of the worst goals I have ever seen.

How the f*ck didn't that referee see that the ball was over the line? He was right there!

Seriously, how can top level games not have adopted video cameras by now?

See its all because England are white and he couldn't tell the difference between a foot and a ball, you know it just looked like a big football.

I want to know who is paying Blatter et al to continually block a move into the 20th century with goal line tech.

As glad as I am that England are winning I would much rather that:

1. It wasn't Rooney who had got on the end of that incredibly lucky cross. His undeserved reputation will now be enhanced by his 4 goal in 20 national games. Cracking rate for a star striker. (Incidentally, his head now looks like an over large spud with moss growing on it).

2. It wasn't that human filth Terry who saved our bacon by not actually saving our bacon.

Also, I cannot believe that the idiot commentator on ITV suggested that a Ukraine victory would be as important as the fall of USSR control. At that point, I adopted my father's strategy of turning off the TV audio and listening to the DAB feed from 5Live (the analogue feed makes you prescient, since it runs ahead of the digital TV signal!)

Alien Love Gardener wrote:

How the f*ck didn't that referee see that the ball was over the line? He was right there!

Seriously, how can top level games not have adopted video cameras by now?

Because the corrupt Swiss bastard and his French catamite do not think they are required. The official explanation is that not every country could afford it, so the game would not be the same everywhere. Fair enough, but surely FIFA could take a holiday from making corrupt TV deals and imposing sh*tty beer on Brazilian stadia with ludicrous tax breaks to equip two or three stadia in every FIFA member country.

As for what the extra officials on the line are meant to be doing, your guess is as good as mine.

Clive Tyledsley, watches every game through Man U goggles. Doesn't stop to wonder why the Man U front three didn't manage to generate a single chance.

If you ever want to get plastered, watch any Champs League game and have a swig every time he mentions that 'magical night in Barcelona'. Take two if either Man U or Barca are actually involved.

At least France doesn't have to worry about hurting Mexes' feelings when they tell him he's benched for the next game...

Now come on, which of you won't be cheering sweet, gentle Mario on against the Human Sewer at the weekend. Hopefully he's also persuading Daniele di Rossi that a Roma player is allowed to wear sky blue, and that pastie and chips is the pinnacle of pre-match dietary discipline.

Never did me any harm when I was on me way to Maine Rd or the Etihad.