...or, What's On My TiVo, and why do I watch so much TV?

I realized today that we're getting very close to premier season, and that I should open up the TiVo and really take stock. You know, dust out the nooks and crannies, examine all those little nicknacks sitting on the shelves. Of the... metaphorical... shelves of my... TiVo.

Right.

Anyways, there are a CRAP TON of new shows, decent looking ones, and so I thought I'd examine a few of them and see if I can't find a place for them on my schedule. So, without further ado, my TiVo schedule for Fall 2007.

("B" denotes "broadcast" and "C" denotes "cable." Gotta love the dual tuner. Also, bolded shows are new this season.)

Mondays: How My Hero Banged Your Chuck

8:00pm-8:30pm (B) - How I Met Your Mother (CBS) - Best Comedy on TV.

8:30pm-9:00pm (B) - Big Bang Theory (CBS) - Two nerds use their smarts to get a hot chick to like one of them. You see, the title's a play on words. Anyways, I'll give this show one episode like I did The Class last year, and I'll probably watch the same amount of said episode (10 minutes) before I take it off my TiVo.

8:00pm-9:00pm (C) - Chuck (NBC) - Got to watch the pilot on an NBC preview DVD through Blockbuster, and it. was. awesome. Nerd has 1000s of government secrets downloaded into his brain and now has to juggle his real life, the hot CIA agent trying to protect whatever's in his head, and the NSA agent (Adam Baldwin!) who wants to take it by force. Potential to be best new show of the season.

9:00pm-10:00pm (B) - Heroes (NBC) - They damn near lost me with that season finale, but come on. It's Heroes.

10:00pm-11:00pm (B) - Journeyman (NBC) - Guy involuntarily travels back in time to help people, and is not Scott Bakula. Despite that fact (or maybe because of it) the pilot was decent, so this gets a trial period.

Tuesdays: Victim/Patient/Client of the Week Shows ARE TOO Good!

8:00pm-9:00pm - Bones (Fox)

9:00pm-10:00pm - House (Fox)

10:00pm-11:00pm (B) - Boston Legal (ABC) - Denny Crane. Enough said.

10:00pm-11:00pm (C) - (Until October 30th) - Cane (CBS) - If I told you we were going to watch a show about being an executive in a sugar cane company, you'd probably punch me. But if I told you that executive was Jimmy Smits, well then... you'd probably still want to punch me. But maybe not as hard.

10:00pm-11:00pm (C) - (After October 30th) - Nip/Tuck (F/X)

Left Off But Easily Found At Another Time: Damages (F/X)

Wednesdays: This Is The Night We Put All Of Our New Shows. Please Get Hooked Before Lost Comes Back.

8:00pm-9:00pm (B) - Pushing Daisies (ABC) - A man has the power to bring people back from the dead. He uses this power to wake up corpses, ask who killed them, re-kill them, and then go collect the reward money. Created by Bryan Fuller (Wonderfalls) so it should be quirky fun right up until it gets cancelled.

9:00pm-10:00pm (B) - Private Practice (ABC) - This, the spinoff of Grey's Anatomy in which the hot redhead OB/GYN doctor gets to examine HER feelings and get HERSELF in wacky situations, looks really bad. Only on my TiVo until I can find something to replace it.

9:00pm-10:00pm (C) - Bionic Woman (NBC) - Come on guys. Hot chick (Michelle Ryan, who coincidentally played "hot chick" on the BBC's Jekyll) becomes Bionic Woman and fights Katee Sackhoff (Battlestar). How can you NOT watch it?

10:00pm-11:00pm (B) - Dirty Sexy Money (ABC) - Might have potential. Lawyer (Peter Krause from Six Feet Under, whom I love) takes care of his rich family of clients (Donald Sutherland, Billy Baldwin, etc.) Look for it to be replaced in November with "Dancing with the Bachelor 911."

10:00pm-11:00pm (C) - Life (NBC) - Another from the preview DVD. A cop is wrongfully imprisoned for 12 years. When he gets out, besides a gigantic settlement, he asks for his job back. Also, he's a liiiiitle crazy. Good pilot, though.

Thursdays: Decisions, Decisions.

8:00pm-8:30pm (B) - My Name Is Earl (NBC)

8:30pm-9:00pm (B) - 30 Rock (NBC)

8:00pm-9:00pm (C) - Ugly Betty (ABC) - I like it. Sue me.

9:00pm-10:00pm (B) - Grey's Anatomy (ABC) - I like it. Sue me.

9:00pm-9:30pm (C) - The Office (NBC)

9:30pm-10:00pm (C) - Scrubs (NBC) - Can they manage to make the last season (no seriously you guys, this is the last one, we promise) closer to the first three seasons or crappy like the last three?

10:00pm-11:00pm (B) - Big Shots (ABC) - In which a bunch of guys you like (Dylan McDermott, The Practice; Josh Molina, West Wing; Michael Vartan, Alias; Christopher Titus, Titus) get together and somehow make a show that will probably end up not being good.

10:00pm-11:00pm (C) - ER (NBC) - As fun as it is to scream "Stamos!" and shake my fist whenever he comes on screen, I actually think the show's gotten better than the past few years since he's been on.

Left Off But Easily Found At Another Time: It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia (F/X), Mad Men (AMC)

Fridays:

9:00pm-10:00pm (B) - Moonlight (CBS) - This show looks really bad, but it's about a vampire detective (I guess "detective vampire" is more correct) so I'm legally obligated to at least TRY it.

9:00pm-10:00pm (C) - Friday Night Lights (NBC) - Woah. It's actually on Friday. My brain hurts. Still, just an all around good show from start to finish last season.

10:00pm-11:00pm (B) - Las Vegas (NBC) - It's gotten so over the top over the last couple seasons that pretty soon we're gonna find out that Mary's an alien and that this is all going on in the mind of a 3 year old. I can't wait to be there when that happens.

Sundays:

8:00pm-10:00pm - My Tivo tries to record The Simpsons/Family Guy/American Dad but instead gets 25 minutes of Terry, Howie, and God Knows Who Else followed by clipped versions of all your favorite Fox cartoons. "Did anyone see the first 4 minutes of American Dad last night? I bet the rest of the episode was funny."

8:00pm-9:00pm (B) - Viva Laughlin (CBS) - Man pursues American Dream by opening a casino in sunny (and shady) Laughlin, Nevada. Based on Viva Blackpool, which was on the BBC and therefore was probably good, hopefully this show will take a cue from "The Office" and not "Coupling," transfer-wise.

Anything missing I have to watch? Oh, who am I kidding, you're not still reading.