As is normal, I got up around 7:30am this morning cranky and generally crotchety all around because I hate my job like most everyone else. We've got one of those special massaging shower heads on a cord-sort-of-thing that you can detach from the mount and make handheld. These things are really handy for shaving. All was going according to plan and I had my razor and can of shaving cream picked up and ready to go. Then I reached up to disconnect the shower head and well...that's where the wheels came off the wagon.

As it turns out, this shower head which appeared to be fairly well made is just another cheap Made In China piece of junk. Upon pulling on the unit to disconnect it from its mount, the tiny little paper-thin plastic corner clips that hold shower head to the cord-sort-of-thing (seriously, you should see how useless these are) all snap and the thing comes...nay, blasts right off. At this point, I get a huge blast of water in my face (my eyes were open and looking right at the thing) and proceed to drop my can of shaving cream and razor. The can lands on my right big toe and the razor lands on my left foot, the new blades taking a nice slice out of it. At the same time, what I can only describe as a blast of water strong enough to put down a cavalcade of protesting students is blasting into the painted drywall ceiling over my shower.

After screaming enough obscenities to turn the water blue, I bang my head into the wall while blindly trying to turn off the shower as my eyes are still stinging from the hot water that was blasted into them, hence more obscenities. I then had to stop my foot from bleeding and bandage it up, towel off the ceiling so it doesn't rot and analyze just how much I'm going to look like a douche to my customers today because when I don't shave, I get the facial appearance of the hobos you see riding in train cars on television. I was about 20 minutes late to my first call and all I had the brainpower to come up with as an excuse was traffic. But anyone who lives in Ottawa knows that at 8:30am, there's no traffic when you're driving from Gloucester to Kanata. Needless to say I've also been getting raised eyebrows from my girlfriend all evening when I told her about this.

I don't know what made me want to share this with everyone but you know...well...yeah.