What's your best tip for making women happy?
Friday, August 18th, 2006 - 7:40pm
Just wondering. Since most of you guys are married, you're supposed to know women more than the average dude (that being me).
I mean, I date them, but I don't get to live for years with them and know whether they pass gas when they're asleep (oh god).
So what's the best tip that you can think of that will make any woman's eyes (and heart) light up?
In my experience, flowers(bouquets, delivered to their job or school or anyplace real public), but I almost never do that. At the very least, they'll be really, really thankful. At worst, they'll turn stalkerish. And it's really simple.
So... you?
The man wears a bucket of KFC on his head. I wouldn't expect anything less. - Pred
Interestingly enough making them something like a handmade card personalized for them does fairly well I have found. That or diamonds. heh heh heh
Dante: I'll smoke it with ya bro, we'll go to the loony bin together. I don't give a f*ck.
Things zero says that make me happy: "you are beautiful" and "I love you." Doesn't take much to keep me happy.
Ouch, I have lost myself again
Last.fm
Goin' downtown on demand, no matter how much you don't feel like doing it.
"Men like sex, thus boobies! Oogaba!" - dejanzie
"If ads put your sanity to the test
come on down to Rat Boy's nest!
light up a stogie, and soon you'll see
how rock can be commercial-free!
'I'd hit it!'" - HP Lovesauce
I was thinking of something that you could do for anyone, anyplace, anytime... women in general.. maybe even your mother... But... I guess the US is a more liberal place than here.
The man wears a bucket of KFC on his head. I wouldn't expect anything less. - Pred
Shouldn't we be asking you this, not the other way around?
XBox Live|Tshirts|My Music|GameFly|xfire
I know some things that work sometimes, but I'm curious as to what you guys think =)
The man wears a bucket of KFC on his head. I wouldn't expect anything less. - Pred
Small, unexpected acts of altruism that demonstrate deliberate premeditation and specific consideration for the target individual.
i.e. Surprise her with a small, relevant gift that shows you were thinking about her.
Variable -> Veeble -> vbl
"Nice boys, guys." - Swampy
Well, you should have said so, silly. Uh...watching a chick flick with them on demand, no matter how much you don't feel like doing it. That better?
"Men like sex, thus boobies! Oogaba!" - dejanzie
"If ads put your sanity to the test
come on down to Rat Boy's nest!
light up a stogie, and soon you'll see
how rock can be commercial-free!
'I'd hit it!'" - HP Lovesauce
Getting their favorite dessert, or drink, or treat and keeping it on hand for when they need a pick-me-up or just a pleasant surprise.
Taking off their shoes and giving them a foot massage when they (or both of you) get back from being somewhere on their feet. (who cares if stinky foot syndrome kicks in; you can fake a visit to the bathroom and wash your hands if it bothers you that much
)
Random hugs, or kisses, or compliments - thoughtful compliments, put more thought into it than just "you're pretty!" Complimenting something you really find alluring or wonderful about them; it's much more meaningful and obviously from the heart when you pick something that you genuinely enjoy about them.
Run a towel in the dryer for a couple minutes while they're in the shower, so they have a nice warm towel at hand when they're done.
Smile at them for no reason at all. It's contagious.
A card with a handwritten note inside.
Don't just send roses (but sometimes they really do want roses, so don't never send them!). Pick something unique or different at least, that shows you put thought into it, such as a Christmas bonsai or a spring bouquet of varied meadow flowers.
Let's say she looks like Natalie Portman or something, and you want to compliment her looks. Don't say "hey, you remind me of Natalie Portman!" Instead, say "hey, I saw a picture of Natalie Portman, and she reminded me of you!" Subtle, but meaningful, difference. Hey, you're seeing her, not stalking Portman, right? So who's really the one you're more attracted to?
Write a poem. Just don't start it with "Roses are red, violets are blue" and end it with "and so are you!"
Note that this is just a short list to get you started (and yes, these are all things I've done). Also note that most of these cost no money, or very little.
Tongue exercises. Up, down, left, right! Up, down, left, right! Faster! Harder!
We shall grapple with the ineffable, and see if we may not eff it after all.
Really listen to her, even if it is about something that does not interest you.
Xbox LIVE: oldman GWJ
"I might have gotten away with it if it wasn't for a damningly tenacious clinger." - Crouton on a childhood excrement escapade
B, A, start, select?
neither lesbian nor kitten!
Not interacting with them at all.
Danjo Olivaw Lives
Small gifts, actually showing an interest in what they have to say, calling just to talk, home cooked meal where they don't have to do anything, watch what they want to watch, telling them something that you are embarassed about even if the rest of the world doesn't think it's a big deal, random candlelight, picnic in the park under the sun (unless she is allergic), there are probably other things. I'm not that experienced as I've only ever had one real girlfriend and it lasted 11 months (Chronicled here on Gamers With Jobs!).
McChuck wrote:
Do the dishes without being asked.
Listen.
Being fangoriously devoured by a gelatinous monster.
I have no idea, my relationships go like this, except for the end
ThePolypusher
WAR - Dolz
*groan* Oh man, can't I just buy them some damn diamonds or somethin'?
The man wears a bucket of KFC on his head. I wouldn't expect anything less. - Pred
Mostly it's independent of gender--just treat her the way you'd treat anyone with whom you're going to have to be in close contact for a very long time. That is, respect her as a separate person and remember that she, like all people, is a complex amalgam of memories, tendencies, expectations, etc. that is is subject to constant adaptation...in short, don't get bent out of shape if she doesn't react to a given situation in the way you thought she would. People are processes, not entities, you know?
Having said that, in my experience there are some general differences in the way men and women approach things. Many women feel the need to talk out their problems, running through all the possible positive and negative outcomes, and this includes "problems" in your relationship. It doesn't mean that they really think everything they're talking about is going to happen, and it doesn't mean they're presenting a problem for you to fix. They just want you to listen. So do it.
That, and be considerate in the sack. If a woman doesn't "get there" at least once before your pants come off, you're just being a lazy bastard. Not that you need such advice from what I've read here Mex, that's advice for all the lesser mortals
"Come, amigo, throw away your mind." --Malcolm Lowry, Under the Volcano
First I'd like to say to never listen to any of Danjo's advice when it comes to having girlfriends. I'm going to throw something at him one of these days when he mocks me and Chiggie or shudders at something we do.
Things Chiggie does that are excellent:
- Making it a point to come see what I'm up every once in a while if we're in the house but not doing something together
- Random kisses
- Coming to bed at the same time no matter how much he wants to stay up and play whatever new game he just bought
- Ceased talking about daedric greaves on the dren plantation
- Sneakily buying me books and other surprises that will divert my attention when he wants more gaming time
- Letting me win at DOA
- Running my shower in the morning
- Trying to include me in gaming despite my horrible button mashing and his horror at me abusing the controller and/or any other piece of equipment he hands me. Yep, on Wednesdays if I shoot you in Halo that is pure accident on my part and I squeal gleefully.
- Telling me I always look good to him and he loves me
Offer them a pap smear . . . Or am I the only one who does that?
Depends. Does their health plan cover it?
"Men like sex, thus boobies! Oogaba!" - dejanzie
"If ads put your sanity to the test
come on down to Rat Boy's nest!
light up a stogie, and soon you'll see
how rock can be commercial-free!
'I'd hit it!'" - HP Lovesauce
You just have to add some of your special kind of weird to every thread on the board don't you?
As for roses, I've always hated the value women tend to place on them. Mostly because I'm allergic to the damned things. If they're even in the same house I'm in I start sneezing, my eyes water, and I get a nice runny nose. It's like instant-cold coupled with instant sinus pressure headaches. Wee!
*Edit to add a question for the womenfolk*
If I'm allergic to roses, but I suck it up and hand said hypothetical female a bouqet of roses anyway, does it mean more to her? Or is she just mildly grossed out because she knows I'll be sick all night long?
I'm not sure I care to find out. Flower delivery services for the win.
XBLive: Thin J
PSN: Thin_J
I don't imagine master craftsmen leaping away from completed projects and shouting "Done, motherf*ckers! - 1Dgaf
Mine does. It's all part of the mandatory health inspection I require before I date a woman.
Ah, but it'd add more meaning if you gave those as a gift, knowing that you'd be suffering the whole time, wouldn't it?
"Men like sex, thus boobies! Oogaba!" - dejanzie
"If ads put your sanity to the test
come on down to Rat Boy's nest!
light up a stogie, and soon you'll see
how rock can be commercial-free!
'I'd hit it!'" - HP Lovesauce
Just to set the stage, I don't do many long term monogamous relationships (I'm still not ready to be tied down); but I do have a couple girls who are trying to capture the title.
Let her do things for you. I know it sounds counter-intuitive; but it works. I think it has something to do with turning on those maternal instincts.
Be good in bed and willing to try new things.
Listen and pay attention. Yeah I know it can be hard; but thankfully a little can often go a long way. One of my favorites is to make a note of when she ways she's getting her hair cut or something like that. I add it to my electronic calendar with a reminder so that I remember to compliment her on her hair or whatever that day. She'll be thrilled if you notice that she got her hair done.
Have things delivered to work. I know it's already been mentioned; but it has to be said again due to its effectiveness. Women love to be able to brag about you without actually having to say anything. A big bouquet that will sit on her desk all day is just the ticket. Make it original though, there's nothing worse than her getting the exact same thing that a coworker recently received.
Make her feel safe whenever she's with you.
Don't be indecisive. If she ever says, "what do you want to eat/do/etc" the next words out of your mouth better not be, "I don't know, what do you want to do". She's asking you for a reason.
Cuddle, lots. Not just in bed either. This may not work for all women; but it works with the ones I'm attracted to.
Semper Delectatio
Xbox Live - Cannibal GWJ XFire - cannibalcrowley
http://cannibalcrowley.blogspot.com/
I totally typed that question in an edit while you were posting it.
GET OUT OF MY MIND!
XBLive: Thin J
PSN: Thin_J
I don't imagine master craftsmen leaping away from completed projects and shouting "Done, motherf*ckers! - 1Dgaf
- Tell her you love her. Often. Mean it.
- Tell her she's beautiful. Every day.
- Open and hold the door for her. Always. (Car door too).
- When you give her a gift, it helps if it's something that she's maybe mentioned wanting in the past. Pay attention throughout the year..she'll build her Christmas/B-Day/Anniversary list herself. Just listen, and make a mental note. When she opens the gift, you get appreciated twice: once for the gift, and another for paying attention to her.
I could go on, but I've got work to do:)
Neither this thread nor my reply were specifically directed at girlfriends.
Danjo Olivaw Lives
Burn them. It's the only way to be sure.
...
Seriously now, I'd agree with a lot of what CannibalCrowley said. A lot of people here have good ideas. However no matter how much you make them happy don't forget yourself. I don't mean in a selfish way, but make sure they make you happy and that they understand men are more than just dumb animals who like food and the act of procreation. Never do too much to please them and forget your own needs. Of course I am currently single, so feel free to be cynical of my perspective.
1)Listen. No, _really_ listen.
2)Flowers. Make up an occasion. Second Tuesday of the 5th month? Flowers. Even if she _says_ she doesn't like flowers because she doesn't want to have plants killed just for her, she's lying. She loves cut flowers and she loves it when you get them for no apparent reason other than you love her.
3)Space. Give her room to breathe. Her own "cave" just like you have your gaming space, give her her own space. No, the kitchen doesn't count, nor does the vast walk-in closet.
4)Chocolate. Best delivered by you with the flowers from 2. Just because. If you can find a real chocolatier in your town, so much the better. Yes, a $50 box of chocolate half the size of the Whitman's $10 variety pack seems like pure insanity, but there's a difference. No, you probably can't taste the difference, but you probably can't taste the difference in a $3 bottle of Boone's farm and a $20 bottle of Turning Leaf.
5)Shut up. See 1.
6) Yeah, this one's a movie quote, I don't care. "The woman is always right." Even when she's not right, she's right. The woman is always right. Do #1, apply #5, and say "I'm sorry". Be a man, swallow some pride and move on. There's bigger sh*t to worry about than who took your last beer out of the fridge to make room for the chicken.
I've got a lot more, but (2+4) + (1+3+5+6) = Blackjack.
Edit: Also, try "making a woman happy". A seeming subtle difference, but an important one, nonetheless.
"And my son, too, thinks everything is a launchpad, every bug a meal, and every sunny day a reason to take all your clothes off and roll around in the grass." - rabbit