Lying salesmen.
Just had a salesman (well, it was the tech working with the saleslady - but close enough) tell a bold-faced lie. Guy was trying to tell my boss that he and I had a conference call at 09:20 today.
As I'd already fully debriefed my boss, he knew it was bs. Only thing that was supposed to happen, was the tech and the saleslady were each supposed to mail me stuff (which they *didn't*). Well, I just got something from the saleslady (24 hours after the fact), but it's not what I was waiting for.
What's more, my boss told the lying asshat that I was unavailable today. And what do we get 5 minutes later - said asshat calls the office trying to hunt me down.
Needless to say, even if their product *did* do what we needed it to (it doesn't), they still just lost a $10,000+ sale.
So, to make this a more particapatory thread, anyone else have any tales of nefarious sales folk?
No nefariety, just a quick comment.
Did you tell them that? It''s probably worth at least a little entertainment to call the salesman (and maybe his boss) and let him know that his asshattery was expensive...
Don't you understand, Cliff? We put a chainsaw on a machine gun! That's it! It doesn't get more awesome than that! We've peaked, man! We've peaked! - ctrl-alt-del on Gears of War 2
Are there any other type BUT Nedarious asshat sales folk?
Edit: GWJers are the exception I''m sure!
WOW: Bounce
I once had a car salesman switch the 1 that was in the ""thousands"" place with the 3 that was in the ""hundreds"" place on the agreed price of a car, therefore increasing the price to two grand *above sticker*. Being young, naive, and relatively stupid at the time (overworked and not paying much attention to live outside of it), it took me 2 days after getting the car home to realize what had happened.
Car sales people are abslolutely the frigging scum of the earth. Just because people *can* be taken advantage of, doesn''t mean that they should. Everyone who works in that industry deserves the sh*tty jobs that they have. I have *never* met one who wouldn''t take his mother to the friggen cleaners on a deal.
I feel much better now:)
-Fan
Not yet, though I''m sure my boss will get around to it. He *likes* to watch people squirm. Especially sales people. I consider it not worth my time to deal with them further.
Joedeth
Ironjoe
Oh man, I *wish* the slimeball sales people that infiltrate my building would get fried on a stick. Instead, they dupe management out of millions and play golf while we get to deal with the aftermath.
I generated a virtual world in the toilet bowl this morning.
-- Podunk on the PS3's mystical, magical abilities
I have cable internet, but no cable TV (I do not own a TV set). My cable company kept insisting they I purchase their TV offerings as well, as a combo with my internet service. So, approximately once a month, I''d get a phone call from my cable company trying to sell me the ""hottest and latest deal,"" all over again.
For quite some time I got a real kick out of it. You see... these people that call you do not deserve a designation of people. That would be an insult to the human race. On top of that, they deserve to be replaced with the phone-sex talking computers as the level of intelligence and actual work is about equal. So, what they''d do is establish that they are speaking to me. Then they''d procede to read me some sales pitch. You can tell that they are reading rather than trying to actually convince me of it. Then they would start with the obligatory ""agree with me"" mind games. Of course, I''d play along.
...
Sales person: ""Don''t you think this is a good deal?""
Me: ""Yes I do.""
Sales person: ""So, can I sign you up?""
Me: ""Nope.""
Sales person*emboldened by my following of the script: ""Can I ask you why not?""
Me*coldly*: ""Because I don''t have a TV.""
Sales person: *obligatory 5-7 second silence as they are 1) dumbstruck, 2) atempt to process what I''ve just said but fail, 3) try to recover by quickly skimming the FAQ they have before them, which gives them all possible answers I could give them and their required retorts to them, 4) realize they cannot find my answer there, 5) attempt one more time, 6) fail one more time, 7) sit there, staring at a screen realizing that for the first time since they got that job they must actually act like a human being*
Me: *patiently waits for them to reconnect the brain fuse they blew and getting seriously amused by each passing second*
Sales person: ""Uhhh... Ok. Goodbye."" *hang up before I could actually say bye back*
(@)
I''ve had a fricken life insurance salesman calling me at work for the past 3 weeks. He keeps trying to set up appointments to meet with me. I finally told him that I get insurance through my company (a University) for far cheaper and better coverage than he could offer. He calls me the next day to say he''s reviewed my policy with the University and that he could beat it. I found that pretty amusing, considering that information is confidential, and told him to go f*ck himself. I put up with pestering me at work, but when he outright lies to me to try and trick me into meeting with him to discuss his crap insurance policies it crossed the line.
Fan, I feel your pain too. I bought a new car right after I graduated and got raked over the coals by the salesman too. I''ll never buy a new car again, and hopefully never buy anything from a car dealer again either.
"Shop smart. Shop S Mart!"
-- Ash, Housewares
Ok. I am a bit confused by all this. Someone somewhere hasn''t had a sales person lie to them? Really? I have at least 4 or 5 major projects, current or past, that had some major ""mis-communication"" with a sales person. The key is if it was intentional or not. For what ever reason, some vendors fib more than others.
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Mythos Player ID: cejansen
""Errors? No those are called Features""
WOW: Bounce
Yep. Heard that one along with ""You know, it worked in the lab.""
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Mythos Player ID: cejansen
I have Jehovah''s Witnesses come to my house and try and sell me on their whole, ""Salvation"" schtick. My roommate usually puts on his Danzig skull shirt, plays Danzig really loud, and gets the dog to bark at them. They leave for some reason. So much for faith.
And remember, the Japanese aren't commercially whaling. They're conducting "research". Like "researching how delicious this whale is". - Paleocon
I''m a service tech, who has the dubious honour of being the guy that fronts up to customers and delivers the news that no, this thing can''t do that, sorry.
Don''t start me on Sales reps lol. Me go crazy!
XBL: GooRoo71
Awww, that''s weak.
Now my brother, he answers the door holding a copy of The Koran.
They turn and run. Scared. Often without saying a word.
Gaming / PC Tech Blog: Blast Processing - www.blastprocessing.net
Xbox Live: Legion SB | PSN: Legion_SB
"Damn, your comedic timing is awesome." -- Spaz, *Legion* Fan #1437
We had one of our business partners sell the Mac version of our product to a district down in the states. This wouldn''t have a bad thing, if we had had a Mac product at the time... Tech support got weekly calls about where their Mac software was. Oy vey...
Don't you understand, Cliff? We put a chainsaw on a machine gun! That's it! It doesn't get more awesome than that! We've peaked, man! We've peaked! - ctrl-alt-del on Gears of War 2
My only exchange with a JW door knocker was when I was in my teens. I asked why they were called Jehovah Witnesses and the guy replies, ""Well God''s name is Jehovah.""
I say, ""Yeah right. His name is really Jehovah.""
""No it is"", he say and then opens his bible to a passage and reads it out.
""Wow, so when I get to heaven, (assuming I''m one of the 144,000 or whatver it is) I''m not really going to be able to say ''Hey Jehovah'' or something along those lines right? I mean he''s probably big on tradition and ''the way things ought to be''.""
The guy just looked at me.
I say, ""I''m not really interested, but thanks anyway.""
I think every JW I''ve met since then (about 5) has been pretty cool.
Do you ever walk alone like a drifter in the dark?
Wow, people who actually answer the door for a JW. We usually spot ''em down the street and just turn the hose on ''em when they try to come in the yard.
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Hey! I''m in Sales and I represent...er...resent everything that was said in this thread. If those in support would actually give us the product, we could sell it, but management asks us to sell it and we do our jobs. Not our fault that the actual product that was presented to us doesn''t actually exist.
In all seriousness, its'' hard to be a salesman with all of the stereotypes and ""used car"" guys out there. The reason I am successful is that I am honest, and I will flat out tell you what our service can and cannot do. The hardest aspect of selling is making sure you understand what your customer is looking to do, and matching a product to his need. If the customer does not provide adequate information, it leads down the paths mentioned above. When there is open, honest, and productive dialogue between sales and customer, there are no issues. I can''t remember my last complaint......everyone needs to communicate better, especially us sales-people.
"When will then be now?"
GWJ FF 2004 CHAMPION!
Uh-oh. They''re going to kick Fredster out of the salesman''s union now
.
Joedeth
Ironjoe
I did that once wearing only a towel. Funniest facial reaction ever.
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We have a lot of Mormons where I live. Every once in a while they stop by. My mom used to be able to see them coming and would run around the house quietly informing everyone ""Get down, the mormons are here"". We literally had to duck behind things and not move until they went away.
McChuck wrote:
/agreed
I don't think I've ever said this sentence before, but man would I love to hump that butterfly.-- KrazyTaco
One phone call and you're melting like butter over my kettle pop. -- Edwin to Mex
2005 GWJFFL2 Champion
I''ve been known to answer the door to Jehovah''s Witnesses wearing nothing buy my AR-15. Once it was a couple of fairly hot chicks, and it almost got me some.
Unfortunately, if I slash my wrist with my lightsaber it cauterizes instantly. - PurEvil on emo Star Wars plots.
If you say it was 2, it would make the story better!
I don't think I've ever said this sentence before, but man would I love to hump that butterfly.-- KrazyTaco
One phone call and you're melting like butter over my kettle pop. -- Edwin to Mex
2005 GWJFFL2 Champion
I think you misquoted me
Unfortunately, if I slash my wrist with my lightsaber it cauterizes instantly. - PurEvil on emo Star Wars plots.
As a developer, I''m usually bitching about our sales team for selling vapourware, then the services teams for letting it into the scope document and only telling us two weeks in advance. But that''s probably snafu for most of us
Personally, my favourite is credit card companies who call to ""confirm"" my personal details before sending me their card. It only takes about fives times to convince them that I like living within my means. Now, if only my alma mater would stop sending me credit cards offers.
Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit. - Oscar Wilde
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur. (Whatever is said in Latin sounds profound.) - Roedy Green
As a sales person (not really I am more technical sales which means someone asks me a question on what they need to fix their instrument and I sell them the product to fix it), I will say it helps to be honest and not lie ten times more than it does to get one sale by dishonesty. Why?? Here is an example:
I was helping a customer find a replacement part for their instrument.. unfortunately we never got it for anyone before so I had to research it and contact the company that makes it. The company would not give us any pricing on said item except retail (which we would have to mark up and screw the customer). So I just told the customer that the supplier is not giving us distributor pricing and that it would be better for him to contact the other company directly and gave him the contact info.
The 3 contacts that this customer gave me through recommendations/word of mouth + the repeat business fully justified the act. If you get a good/bad reputation people react to it.
Playing WoW as: Vilius (70 NE Druid)
But... but it DOES work in the lab!!!
Fedaykin98 wrote:
Aperture Science wrote:
My worst job experience ever:
I was sent along with a sales guy and a (supposedly) knowledgeable analyst type guy to meet with...40 freaking actuaries in a hotel in Chicago to talk about the huge datasets of healthcare stuff they bought from us. I''m along just in case there are questions the two of them can''t handle. I have prepared nothing, because I''m not making the presentation. They actually paid us for this presentation.
About an hour into I see that our analyst guy is a doofus who has prepared about an hours worth of stuff for a four hour presentation. Then the questions start, and only I know the answers. And then the questions turn to what our recently booted VP of sales promised these people. At this point the sales guy and analyst have done a duck and cover and it''s just me. So for the next two hours I have to explain all of the stuff we can''t do, to forty very particular and pissed off actuaries (not cheerful people, really).
The great kicker was while we''re having lunch the two guys tell me they''re out of material and these folks have paid to be talked to for another hour. So while they ate, I prepared an hours worth of fabulous bullsh*t, and by this time most people in the room were clued into the fact that we were really done and knew I was winging it.
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