Articles

GWJ Conference Call Episode 179

Gamers With Jobs — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 00:30:42 -0400

Episode 179 - March 17th, 2010
Final Fantasy XIII, Bad Company 2, Scrap Metal, What If Crazy Things Happened?, Your Emails and more!

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(A Hypothetical 44.7 megs, 1:18:05)

This week we gaze into our crystal ball (rabbit's head) and see what the industry would be like if things like the 1983 video games market crash never happened. Spoiler: Nolan Bushnell becomes emperor. If you want to submit a question or comment call in to our voicemail line at (612) 284-4563.

Coming to Terms With UbiSoft

Elysium — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 11:27:41 -0500

I have an insane theory about the airline industry — I think they genuinely want me to stop flying on their airplanes.

I think that when major air-carriers tuck into their silk sheets at night, they dream of a hyper-efficient fleet filled with steely-eyed business class flyers with practiced methods of travel and corporate expense accounts. Never again would they be burdened with a bunch of pesky amateur flyers with screaming kids and an over-inflated sense of entitlement just because the family managed to scrounge up a few hundred dollars to fly to Omaha.

Were I to write to Delta airlines and tell them of how I chose to spend three days driving across the country with my two boys rather than endure ten hours under their thumb, would the response be a curt but genuine, “Thank you?”

Sometimes it very much seems like certain companies are entirely comfortable with the idea of just annoying a certain segment of consumers away. You know, companies like Ubisoft.

Daydream Believer: OnLive

wordsmythe — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 12:33:52 -0400

It's interesting how quickly countervailing opinions become prevailing opinions these days. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that the Internet is so good at challenging every belief I would care to share (and a few that I should probably keep to myself). It's good to question your beliefs and ideas, and it's good to have voices that tell me not to pin my hopes, dreams and livelihood to a falling star. I'm sure my wife appreciates all the naysayers who've stopped me from chasing daydreams that would lead me away from my fairly secure job with steady paycheck and reliable insurance benefits. But few dreams become reality on accident, and well entrenched cynicism will never stop me from daydreaming.

A lot of ears pricked up when companies started murmuring about streaming high-res games over the internet. Wild, crazy rumors about a world where we wouldn't need to struggle to keep pace in the PC-hardware arms race. A new world where we'd almost automatically keep up with both new system requirements and the Joneses. Next thing, I was thinking about jet-pack commutes and sex-worker AIs that downloaded right into your high-tech pants at the blink of an eye.

But I can count on the Internet to challenge those daydreams. Maybe OnLive's game-streaming service wouldn't be quite as shiny without the studio lighting and lens effects. Maybe that jet pack would turn out to be a gas-guzzler, or the AI sexbot would download and start up while I was in the middle of weaving through jet-pack traffic, and even then it'd be all pixelated and awkward. But a jet pack would still be pretty cool, even if it wouldn't get a reasonable price point and the kinks worked out until iJet 3.0. And maybe, like my purchase of the original Kindle, buying iJet 1.0 could be a small vote of confidence in the potential of the technology.

Fathers and Sons

Elysium — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 12:01:11 -0500

My six-year-old is wheeled back into pre-op wiping fresh tears from his eyes with hands noticeably shaking. I was not expecting to see him nearly so soon. In fact I didn’t expect to see him again for several hours yet. To the best of my knowledge, getting your tonsils out takes substantially longer than three or four minutes. Something has definitely gone wrong.

“We had a melt down,” my wife says with forced calm that tells its own story. “When they tried to put the mask on, he just …” she doesn’t say “lost it” and she doesn’t have to. I know what that panic looks like. I’ve seen it during enough blood draws by now to recognize that it’s an electric thing that takes on a life of its own. The anesthesiologist smiles from behind the elaborate gurney, frustration buried deep behind a practiced expression.

“We’re going to give him a sedative. It might help his nerves. Also, the medicine we’ll use will probably let him forget what goes on once it takes effect.” There’s a hidden message there that every adult in the room understands. If we have to hold him down next time we take him in for surgery, the message says, at least he won’t remember it.

“I just couldn’t do it, Daddy.” Fresh tears threaten to spill onto his cheek. I nod in what I think is a fatherly way, but I don’t understand and I’m terrified that he will see the horrible hint of disappointment that I am working so hard to hide.

Babies Dream of Dead Worlds

Pyroman[FO] — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 10:41:42 -0400

The laws of physics are the ultimate ruleset. Gravity and momentum have been used for centuries to help create the rules of a game, from sports to dice to racing. One of the more exciting features of video games is that we can now change these fundamental rules of physics. Momentum doesn't have to exert any force at all, or gravity no longer has to point down.

Babies Dream of Dead Worlds is a platformer where gravity pulls you towards the vertical center of the level. If you're towards the top of the level, you get pulled down. If you're towards the bottom of the level, you get pulled up. You can still jump and move about in the air using the arrow keys, just like a normal platformer. However, you can also use the reconfiguration of gravity to your advantage by pushing up when above the center and pushing down when below, slingshotting your way to increased momentum.

The altered physics here provide ample opportunities for strange but satisfying level design. Throw in several teleporting vortexes and oddly shaped platforms, and it just becomes fun to jump around the level. Of course, there is a goal to each level. There are 3 goals, in fact: One set of levels has you collecting coins, one has you racing for time towards the goal, and one has you exploring the level and talking to people. Each set of levels follows a different character.

The art style is just as odd as the physics. Each character is represented by what looks like a flying dong with wings. It's really hard to tell, because all the art looks like it was done in MS Paint. It manages to work though, creating a weird, vaguely-detailed world that is full off-kilter-looking things. The music is just as odd: It's several short, sparse tracks on a constant loop throughout the level. The entire game gives an eerie vibe of quiet unease.

The story is very interesting, and it's worth your while to finish the short game; however, discussing anything about it will likely ruin it, as it's a story designed to reveal itself over the course of the game. I'd highly recommend finishing the game, as it only takes about 15-20 minutes.

Why You Should Check This Out: Babies Dream of Dead Worlds is a platformer with unique physics where instead of just jumping you're mostly riding gravity to where you want to go. A unique but vaguely disturbing art style is paired with some quiet, haunting music to give a constant sense of tension as the story unfolds throughout the game. It's a game that reveals itself as you play through its short 15-20 minute length.

Play Now

GWJ Store Has Launched!

Certis — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:46:02 -0500

People have been asking us for years when we’d be getting shirts and other cool stuff out the door so they can represent their love for our awesome community. The time has finally come to unveil the new store and we’re excited to have both the original Gamers With Jobs t-shirt along with the first winner from our design contest back in … wow, that’s a long time ago.

One of our absolute favorites was one of many designs submitted by community member Fredrik Skarstedt (Fredrik_S). He had a bunch of awesome ideas but his Friend Me Up graphic design was particularly inspired. We’re very pleased to offer a regular t-shirt in multiple colors and babydoll versions for the ladies!

This is only the beginning. Over the next few months we plan to release new stuff based on what you guys want and some of our other winning designs. Big thanks to Cleveland Printwear for making our awesome swag!

*note* We have folks outside the US and Canada covered too, check out the international order form on the site.

Oh Sh*t, I've Grown Up

Certis — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:23:14 -0500

I’ve been staring at this screenshot from the original Everquest for what feels like hours. The graphics are dated, of course, since the game has been out for a decade, but that’s not what has me so transfixed. This screenshot is like looking through a wormhole into my past and seeing a younger, less hairy me slumped in his dingy computer chair and trying to retrieve his corpse before sunup.

It was a time when I was still single and jobless. Aside from phoning it in on some computer classes, I didn’t have a whole lot going on in my life. I was 18 years old, living in the big city in a house full of crazy people, and my only real concerns were leveling-up my Wizard and whether I was going to eat Subway or McDonald's for lunch. It was an existence devoid of any lasting meaning or direction.

It sucked, but it was awesome.

Metro 2033 - First Impressions

Elysium — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 12:28:50 -0400

I am safe for the moment behind the bulwark, as dust and smoke linger on the bullet-ridden dead, some human and some very much not, that have fallen on ragged concrete just beyond the sandbags. In the distance a curious fire flickers conjuring ragged shadows that reach like nightmare corpse fingers toward us. The great and rotting underground tunnels that tower to either side are filled with the directionless sound of movement and malice.

As I triple-check the charge of my flashlight, my companion explains through a thick Eastern European accent that I am to make my way into the dark and collapse the tunnel with explosives that I will find on what is presumed to be a dead soldier lost somewhere in the black. If am overwhelmed by the creatures that stalk the darkness, then I am to lead them back to this outpost and the arsenal of soldiers who will wait here armed for my unlikely return. As I listen to the instructions, I can not get past the idea that I will be sent out into the twisting shadows alone.

I ignite my flashlight and the anemic illumination slices a minor wound into the darkness, enough just to bring focus and clarity to the bloodied dead that initially block my way. My gaze lingers on a creature, and its dead-eye seems to consider me with equal gravity. I reload my already fully loaded shotgun, and despair at how little ammo I have.

Somewhere in the darkness I have faith I will find more shells. Somewhere in the darkness I am certain I will come face to face with the lurking malevolence that waits in shadow. Somewhere in the darkness, in the suffocating onyx of underground night, far down the puncture wound of this subway tunnel, I will lay my ordinance at the nest of these creatures, and I will run pursued by fire and teeth.

This is Metro 2033.

March 15 - March 19

Elysium — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 13:36:39 -0400

God of War 3. As if I weren't lusting after this particular game enough already, the endless praise from the enthusiast press has only cemented my need for this game. Both previous games exist as prime examples of pure, unadulterated fun, and my enthusiasm for a third trip into the murderous realm of Kratos can not be measured on mortal scales.

What is interesting about this week, however, is the also rans. This is not a week to be too quickly dismissed as all about GoW3. Metro 2033, for example, tempts me with promises of moody gunplay in the fascinating setting the Moscow underground. Developer 4A Games describes this game as a love-letter to PC gamers, which is a phrase that instantly endears me.

I haven't even gotten to Dragon Age: Origin - Awakening yet, about which I know relatively little except that it is more Dragon Age, and thus is sure to be a hit. More Pokemon on the DS means the rich get richer and the addicted get their digital methadone hit one more time, and last but not least, the once might Command and Conquer franchise slinks onto the PC for a fourth iteration .

This is the paragraph where I point out what a busy November it is, but of course, we're not in the middle of the Christmas rush. This is March, people! Honestly, I have no idea what's going on anymore.

Talk Silently

Clemenstation — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:27:44 -0500

Final Fantasy XIII arrives tomorrow, and I am ambivalent.

It's not a case of console envy. I don't mind that my machine of choice won't be able to render individual reflections on Cactuar needles, or whatever. I'm sure I'll be able to endure these supposed visual abominations without therapy.

It's not the silly protagonist names either. Lightning, Snow, B.A. Baracus: these are the characters I’ve learned to expect and embrace since first exchanging promise rings with the Final Fantasy franchise in middle school.

It’s not the characters. It’s their voices I can’t stand.