
Pyro went and hopped on a plane at the last minute this morning, waving happily and saying something about "suckers." In a panic, I found e7.
Now, I'm not mad at Allen "PyromanFO" Cook for ditching us. In fact, it gave me a chance to play a game that is delightfully like jumping on a water bed full of Jell-O, or one of those cartoon naked women from Monty Python cartoons. (No, I'm not going to link them here.) See, as a child, I didn't really get to hang around much with the types of people who had water beds, and e7 gives me a chance to combine my lifelong fantasy of jumping on a water bed with my other fantasy of hurling myself through the air at robots to make them explode.
You push arrow keys to either side to slide along and hold down to stretch the squishy ground until you release and sail haphazardly through the air. There's with some sort of narrative to it about seeking out and destroying a bomb pointed at Earth. (Sure, that makes it sound more like a rocket than a bomb, and sure, you'd think that we earthlings could come up with something better than an unarmed hockey puck to save our planet) But I wasn't there to save anything. I was there to bounce.
And it was delightful.
Up until section 14G, that is. There's a massive difficulty spike there, and rather than keep battling the robot phallus you see in the screengrab, I figured I'd let you all try it out, at least to get a shot at the fun mechanics before the work day ends.
Why You Should Check This Out: I know there's a story and stuff, and the art's neat and there's some atmosphere, but it's also a fun little mechanic that could as easily be repackaged as Hockey Puck's Adventures In Spongy Trampoline Land. That would be a much less frustrating game, I bet, too.
Anyway, you Goodjers are probably all better at platform and jumping mechanics than I am, so maybe you can play it and tell me how great the story is when you easily beat it. Doesn't that sound fun?